PLEASANTVILLE

     He stops wiping for a moment, holding the towel in his hand.

                         MR. JOHNSON (CONT)
               I didn't know what to do.

     He stares at the rag a little troubled.

                         DAVID
               What's wrong?

                         MR. JOHNSON
               Well--I always wipe down the counter and
               then you set out the napkins and glasses
               and then I make the french fries ...

                         DAVID
                    (confused)
               Yeah ...

                         MR. JOHNSON
               But you didn't come so I kept on wiping.

     He looks down at the towel clearly disturbed. David pauses
     for a moment then starts toward him.

                         DAVID
               I'm sorry.

     He crosses to Mr. Johnson who has polished one section of the
     counter right down to the wood. David takes the towel out of
     his hand and folds it neatly in front of him.

                         DAVID (CONT)
                    (gently)
               You know, if this ever happens again,
               you can make the fries even if I haven't
               put out the napkins yet.

                         MR. JOHNSON
               I'm so glad you're here.

                         DAVID
               I understand.

     EXT. PARKER HOUSE. NIGHT.

     Biff's convertible rolls up to the curb with Pat Boone
     playing on the radio. He runs a comb through his short blonde
     hair before grabbing the bouquet of flowers next to him and
     heading up the walk. Biff rings the doorbell and, a moment
     later, Jennifer's silhouette appears in the doorway ...

                         BIFF
               Oh. Mary Sue ...

     EXT. SODA SHOP. NIGHT.

     The place is really hopping now. All the spots in the parking
     lot are filled with vintage "jalopies" and several patrons
     are streaming through the door. The SAME JOHNNY MATHIS SONG
     is still PLAYING on the juke box, and the neon ice cream soda
     sign blinks against the sky.

     INT. SODA SHOP.

     David is trapped behind the counter, furiously working to
     keep up with the load. Several clean cut teenagers pepper him
     with orders while he yanks at the pumps and spiggots. It's
     clear he isn't used to this.

                         DAVID
                    (frazzled)
               Peppermint shake, chocolate soda, two
               orders of fries and a split?

                         TEEN AGE GIRL
               Peppermint soda, two chocolate shakes,
               order of fries, and we'll split it.

     David nods quickly, wiping some sweat from his brow. He
     scoops some ice cream into the metal blender as Mr. Johnson
     comes up beside him.

                         MR. JOHNSON
               There aren't any cheeseburgers.

                         DAVID
                    (turning)
               What?

                         MR. JOHNSON
               Well, usually I put out the burger and
               then you finish with the lettuce ...

                         DAVID
               Listen to me!

     Mr. Johnson recoils slightly.

                         DAVID (CONT)
               Do you have the lettuce?

                         MR. JOHNSON
               ... Yeah.

                         DAVID
               Have you cooked the burgers?

                         MR. JOHNSON
                    (quieter)
               Yes.

                         DAVID
               Well you can just put on the lettuce,
               finish the burger and pretend it was me
               doing it all along.

     Mr. Johnson stares at him.

                         DAVID (CONT)
               Really. It's fine.

     DIFFERENT ANGLE. SODA SHOP ENTRANCE.

     The screen door swings open and is held there by the end of a
     Letterman's sweater. A moment later, Jennifer sashays
     through, parading her new Jane Russell profile. Her
     "girlfriends" TITTER from the comer as Biff rushes up to a
     table, and pulls out a chair. She sashays into it, brushing
     against him as she goes.

     ANGLE. DAVID.

     He stares motionless at the spectacle--concerned and
     apprehensive. David holds a hot fudge sundae under the soda
     spiggot and jerks back on the lever blowing ice cream all
     over his chest.

     FULL SHOT. TABLE.

     Biff stares across the table at Jennifer with the wholesome
     devotion of a labrador retriever. He looks like a cross
     between Troy Donahue and a mannequin.

                         BIFF
                    (haltingly)
               I sure am glad you said you'd come out
               with me tonight Mary Sue.

                         JENNIFER
                    (full blown "Mary Sue")
               Well "gee whizz" Biff. I sure am glad
               you asked me.

     He guffaws for a moment or two before speaking again.

                         BIFF
               I don't know if I ever said this to you
               before, but, well ... I think you're
               just about the keenest girl in the whole
               school ...

                         JENNIFER
               Really Biff? The keenest?

                         BIFF
               Oh yeah.

                         JENNIFER
                    (all sarcasm)
               Gosh. I hardly know what to say.

                         DAVID (OS)
               What can I get you two?

     WIDER.

     He stands at their table holding a little white pad of paper
     and a pencil. Jennifer looks up at her brother and almost
     bursts out laughing. He wears his soda jerk hat at a jaunty
     angle with large white apron tied around his neck.

                         BIFF
               Oh, I dunno Bud. Guess I'll have my
               usual cheeseburger and a cherry coke.

     More goony laughs. David turns to Jennifer who puts on the
     same dopey countenance.

                         JENNIFER
               Oh, I dunno Bud. Guess I'll just have a
               salad and an Evian Water.

     He shoots her a dirty look. Jennifer just smiles at him.

                         JENNIFER (CONT)
               Cheeseburger it is.

     ANGLE. FOLLOWING DAVID.

     He glowers at her all the way back to the counter. David
     posts the order in the little carousel clip board, keeping an
     eye on the table the entire time ...

     RESUME. TABLE.

     Biff gazes across the table at Jennifer with an adoring look
     on his face. His hands are properly folded in front of him.
     She's still trying to do her best "Mary Sue."

                         BIFF
               See the whole time we were in civics
               together, I really wanted to sit next to
               you--but you were always sitting between
               Peggy Jane and Lisa Anne.

     There is some TITTERING behind her. Jennifer doesn't respond.

                         BIFF (CONT)
               ... And you always seemed so smart and
               everything. Like that report you did on
               "Our Town Hall." Gosh. I didn't know
               what I'd talk to you about.

                         JENNIFER
               Well, sometimes talking's over-rated.
               Don't you think?

                         BIFF
               Hunh?
                    (goony laugh)
               Oh, right ...

     He still doesn't understand. Biff GUFFAWS for a moment or two
     then glances down at the table top. There is a momentary
     break in the Music as Johnny Mathis' "MISTY" starts up all
     over again. It's enough to make you shoot yourself.

                         BIFF (CONT)
               So I know I haven't been steady with
               anybody, but I just don't want to rush
               it. You don't want to make a mistake
               with something that important.

                         JENNIFER
               Oh, gosh no.

                         BIFF
               I mean, there's kids that are even
               holding hands already but I figure
               there's plenty of time for that kind of
               thing later on. Don't you?

                         JENNIFER
               Oh you bet.
                    (beat)
               Will you excuse me for a sec?

     Jennifer gets up in a daze and heads toward the bathroom.

     ANGLE. DAVID.

     He freezes behind the counter and watches as his sister
     practically stumbles through the bathroom door.

     INT. BATHROOM.

     Of course there aren't any toilets. Jennifer gropes her way
     to the sink and leans against the counter.

                         JENNIFER
               Jesus Chirist ...

     She turns and sits against the sink for a moment with a
     dumbstruck look on her face. Jennifer shakes her head for a
     moment or two, when the door to the bathroom bursts open.

                         GIRL'S VOICES
                    (overlapping)
               "Did he give it to you ... Did he give
               it to you ... I bet he gave it to her
               ... Did he give it to you?"

                         JENNIFER
                    (straight ahead)
               I don't think he knows how.

     They TITTER away, even though they don't get it either. It
     sounds like an aviary.

                         LISA ANNE
               I bet he's gonna take her to Lover's
               Lane.

                         PEGGY JANE
               I bet he is. I bet he is.

                         BETTY JEAN
               I bet he's even gonna hold her hand!

     They TITTER some more as Jennifer shakes her head.

     INT. SODA SHOP.

     David is standing beside their table as she retums from the
     bathroom.

                         DAVID
                    (chipper)
               Couple of cheeseburgers and two cherry
               cokes.
                    (pointedly)
               If you need anything, I'll be right over
               there.

                         JENNIFER
                    (Mary Sue)
               Gee whiz "Bud", what could we possibly
               need when we have each other?

     She flashes him a "sweet" smile then reaches out and TOUCHES
     BIFF'S HAND. Both boys jump slightly as Jennifer gives her
     brother a venomous grin then suddenly waves "bye bye." David
     just stares at her panicked as he moves haltingly back to the
     Soda fountain.

                         BIFF
                    (befuddled)
               Anyhow ... I really wanted to come over
               and sit next to you in civics but ...

                         JENNIFER
               You want to get out of here?

                         BIFF
               What?

                         JENNIFER
               You wanna get out of here? You wanna
               leave?

                         BIFF
                    (confused)
               But where would we go?

                         JENNIFER
                    (shrugging)
               ... Lover's Lane.

                         BIFF
                    (swallow)
               Lover's Lane!

     There is an audible GASP from the booth behind them. Jennifer
     ignores it.

                         JENNIFER
               Yeah. Lover's Lane. You up for it?

     CLOSE UP. BIFF.

     He just stares at her with his mouth open ...

     WIDER.

     Jennifer reaches forward grabbing his hand.

                         JENNIFER
               C'mon. Let's go.

     FULL SHOT. SODA FOUNTAIN.

     David is in the middle of making a hot fudge sundae when he
     sees Jennifer leading Biff by the hand into the parking lot.
     Everyone at the counter is enjoying their dessert, when David
     lets out a blood curdling scream.

                         DAVID
               NOOOOOO!

     He vaults over the counter making a bee-line for the door.
     Everyone turns and stares as he races toward the entrance ...

     EXT. SODA SHOP.

     Biff's car is just pulling onto the street when David sprints
     into the parking lot. He takes off after the car, sprinting
     down the street.

                         DAVID
               YOU CAN'T DO THIS JENNIFER! HE DOESN'T
               EXIST! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO SOMEONE WHO
               DOESN'T EXIST!

     The tail lights recede in the distance as David slows to a
     jog and then finally a walk. He pauses, winded, in the
     street, then looks up toward Heaven with a pissed off look on
     his face.

                         DAVID (CONT)
                    (to God)
               Thanks a lot.

                                                       CUT TO:

     EXT. LOVER'S LANE. NIGHT.

     It is a beautiful tree-lined pond with a lush willow tree in
     the foreground. The moonlight glistens silver across the
     water. Several cars are parked in a row with their occupants
     HOLDING HANDS. Biff's convertible is parked at the end.

     SHOT. BIFF'S CAR.

     He sits stiffly at the wheel staring straight ahead. Jennifer
     is draped languidly across the seat beside him, making the
     most of her mohair sweater. She stares at Biff in a not-so-
     Pleasantville-kind-of-way. He glances over at her and
     swallows.

                         BIFF
               Sure is pretty.

                         JENNIFER
                    (staring at him)
               Oh yeah ... Gorgeous.

                         BIFF
               To be honest Mary Sue. I didn't think
               you'd want to come here until we'd been
               pinned for a little while.

                         JENNIFER
               Oh, Biff. You can "pin" me any time you
               want to.

     She leans back a liftle more, draping her arm across the top
     of the seat. Her tits point toward the sky.

                         JENNIFER (CONT)
                    (breathy)
               Or maybe I should just "pin" you.

     He looks over at her a little confused, then breaks into his
     goony laugh.

                         BIFF
               Oh, that's silly Mary Sue. How could you
               possibly pin me?

     CLOSE UP. BIFF.

     He is still guffawing when he looks over at Jennifer and
     suddenly freezes. Biff's eyes widen ...

                                                       CUT TO:

     EXT. PARKER HOUSE. NIGHT.

     David comes sprinting up to the porch, then doubles over
     catching his breath. He clings onto the porch swing when the
     door opens behind him.

                         BETTY
               Bud?

     WIDER.

     His "mother" and "father" come out onto the porch. David
     catches his breath then forces a smile.

                         GEORGE
               Son, what's wrong?

                         DAVID
               Have you seen Mary Sue?

                         BETTY
               Why no. She's still on her date with
               Biff ... is something the matter?

                         DAVID
                    (still panting a little)
               No, I ... I was just ... worried about
               her.

     His mother and father exchange a "knowing" look. George rests
     a hand on his shoulder.

                         GEORGE
                    (oppressively paternal)
               Bud, your sister's a little older now
               and she's naturally going to start going
               out with boys.
                    (beat)
               ... In fact pretty soon--she's even
               going to get married and make someone a
               good little home-maker like your mother
               here.
                    (smiles at Betty/
                    inside joke)
               That's IF she can learn to bake.

                         BETTY
               Oh, George ...

                         GEORGE
               But your sister is a fine young woman
               and she would never do anything for us
               to be concerned about.

                                                       CUT TO:

     EXT. LOVER'S LANE. NIGHT.

     The low gutteral MOANS of two coupling animals drifts out
     over the evening air. It is raw and primitive and desperate.
     The CAMERA begins to TRACK behind all the other cars--their
     occupants primly holding hands in a tender sillouhette. It
     finally COMES TO REST on a convertible at the end, with a
     girl's leg sticking out the window.

     CLOSER.

     A Letterman's sweater hangs over the door. The windshield is
     completely fogged. Jennifer's sweater is draped over the
     backseat. The car is rocking.

     INT. CAR.

     They are clenched in a mad embrace: all arms and hair. Biff
     pulls back for a moment, GASPING for air. His face is covered
     with lipstick and there is a crazy look in his eye. He's
     stuck somewhere between passion and fear as he clings
     desperately to the steering wheel.

                         BIFF
                    (some terror)
               I think I better go home now Mary Sue ...

     She holds onto his shirt as her knee rubs the dashboard.

                         JENNIFER
                    (breathless)
               ... Why?

                         BIFF
                    (more terror)
               I think ... I might be ill ...

     He glances down at his lap a little confused.

                         BIFF (CONT)
                    (a whisper)
               I think something's happening to me.

     He looks at his crotch then back at Jennifer. She reaches up
     and grabs a handful of his hair.

                         JENNIFER
               It's s'posed to happen, Biff.

                         BIFF
               It is?

                         JENNIFER
               Trust me ...

     He looks at her completely confused as she pulls back down,
     and OUT OF FRAME ...

                                                       CUT TO:
     EXT. PARKER HOUSE. NIGHT.

     A single light is burning in the kitchen window.

                         BETTY (OS)
               Do you want some more cookies?

     INT. KITCHEN.

     David is at the kitchen table with a nauseated look on his
     face. There are three empty bottles of milk and cookie crumbs
     all over the table.

                         DAVID
                    (sick)
               Oh no ... I'm fine.

                         BETTY
               How 'bout some Marshmallow Rice Squares?

                         DAVID
               I'm fine.

     There is a knock behind them at the door. David springs up.

                         BETTY
               Now who could that be.

     FOLLOWING DAVID.