The Princess Bride

MAN IN BLACK

You've done nothing but study swordplay?

INIGO

More pursuit than study lately. You see, I cannot find him. It's been twenty years now. I am starting to lose confidence. I just work for Vizzini to pay the bills. There's not a lot of money in revenge.

MAN IN BLACK

(handing back the great sword, starting to rise)

Well, I certainly hope you find him, someday.

INIGO

You are ready, then?

MAN IN BLACK

Whether I am or not, you've been more than fair.

INIGO

You seem a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.

MAN IN BLACK

(walking away a few paces, unsheathing his sword)

You seem a decent fellow. I hate to die.

INIGO

Begin!

And on that word –
 

CUT TO:

THE TWO OF THEM

And what we are starting now is one of the two greatest sword fights in modern movies (the other one happens later on), and right from the beginning it looks different.

Because they aren't close to each other – none of the swords-crossing "en garde" garbage.

No, what we have here is two men, two athletes, and they look to be too faraway to damage each other, but each time one makes even the tiniest feint, the other counters, and there is silence, and as they start to circle –

CUT TO:

THE SIX-FINGERED SWORD

Feinting here, feinting there and –
 

CUT TO:

THE TWO MEN

Finished teasing, begin to duel in earnest.

Their swords cross, then again, again, and the sound comes so fast it's almost continual. Inigo presses on, the Man In Black retreating up a rocky incline.

INIGO
(thrilled)

You're using Bonetti's defense against me, ah?

MAN IN BLACK

I thought it fitting, considering the rocky terrain –

INIGO

Naturally, you must expect me to attack with Capo Ferro –

And he shifts his style now.

MAN IN BLACK

(coping as best he can)

Naturally –

(suddenly shifting again)

– but I find Thibault cancels out Capo Ferro, don't you?

The Man In Black is now perched at the edge of the elevated castle ruin. No where to go, he jumps to the sand. Inigo stares down at him.

INIGO

Unless the enemy has studied his Agrippa –

And now, with the grace of an Olympian, Inigo flies off the perch, somersaults clean over the Man In Black's head, and lands facing his opponent.

INIGO

– which I have.

The two men are almost flying across the rocky terrain, never losing balance, never coming close to stumbling; the battle rages with incredible finesse, first one and then the other gaining the advantage, and by now, it's clear that this isn't just two athletes going at it, it's a lot more that that. This is two legendary swashbucklers and they're in their prime, it's Burt Lancaster in "The Crimson Pirate" battling Errol Flynn in "Robin Hood" and then, incredibly, the action begins going even faster than before as we

CUT TO:

INIGO

And behind him now, drawing closer all the time, is the deadly edge of the Cliffs of Insanity. Inigo fights and ducks and feints and slashes and it all works, but not for long, as gradually the Man In Black keeps the advantage, keeps forcing Inigo back, closer and closer to death.

INIGO

(happy as a clam)

You are wonderful!

MAN IN BLACK

Thank you – I've worked hard to become so.

The Cliff edge is very close now. Inigo is continually being forced toward it.

INIGO

I admit it – you are better than I am.

MAN IN BLACK

Then why are you smiling?

Inches from defeat, Inigo is, in fact, all smiles.

INIGO

Because I know something you don't know.

MAN IN BLACK

And what is that?

INIGO

I am not left-handed.

And he throws the six-fingered sword into his right hand and immediately, the tide of battle turns.

CUT TO:

THE MAN IN BLACK

Stunned, doing everything be can to keep Inigo by the Cliff edge. But no use. Slowly at first, he begins to retreat. Now faster, Inigo is in control and the Man In Black is desperate.

CUT TO:

INIGO

And the six-fingered sword is all but invisible now, as he increases his attack, then suddenly switches styles again.

CUT TO:

A ROCKY STAIRCASE

Leading to a turret-shaped plateau, and the Man In Black is retreating like mad up the steps and he can't stop Inigo – nothing can stop Inigo – and in a frenzy, the Man In Black makes every feint, tries every thrust, lets go with all he has left. But he fails. Everything fails. He tries one or two final desperate moves but they are nothing.

MAN IN BLACK

You're amazing!

INIGO

I ought to be after twenty years.

And now the Man In Black is smashed into a stone pillar, pinned there under the six fingered sword.

MAN IN BLACK

(hollering it out)

There's something I ought to tell you.

INIGO

Tell me.

MAN IN BLACK

I am not left-handed either.

And now he changes hands, and at last, the battle is fully joined.

CUT TO:

INIGO

And to his amazement, he is being forced back down the steps. He tries one style, another, but it all comes down to the same thing – the Man In Black seems to be in control. And before Inigo knows it, the six-fingered sword is knocked clear out of his hand.

Inigo retreats, dives from the stairs to a moss-covered bar suspended over the archway. He swings out, lands, and scrambles to his sword and we

CUT TO:

THE MAN IN BLACK

Who watches Inigo, then casually tosses his sword to the landing where it sticks in perfectly. Then the Man In Black copies Inigo. Not copies exactly, improves. He dives to the bar, swings completely over it like a circus performer and dismounts with a 9.7 backflip.

CUT TO:

INIGO

Staring in awe.

INIGO

Who are you?!

MAN IN BLACK

No one of consequence.

INIGO

I must know.

MAN IN BLACK

Get used to disappointment.

INIGO

Okay.

CUT TO:

INIGO

Moving like lightning, and he thrusts forward, slashes, darts back, all in almost a single movement and –
 

CUT TO:

THE MAN IN BLACK

Dodging, blocking, and again he thrusts forward, faster even than before, and again he slashes but –
 

CUT TO:

INIGO

And there is never a move anyone makes he doesn't remember, and this time he blocks the slash, slashes out himself with the six-fingered sword.

On it goes, back and forth across the rocky terrain, Inigo's feet moving with the grace and speed of a great improvisational dancer.

CUT TO:

THE SIX-FINGERED SWORD

As it is knocked free, arching up into the air, and –
 

CUT TO:

INIGO

Catching it again. And something terrible is written behind his eyes: he has given his all, done everything man can do, tried every style, made every maneuver, but it wasn't enough, and on his face for all to see is the realization that he, Inigo Montoya of Spain, is going to lose.

CUT TO:

THE MAN IN BLACK

Moving in for the end now, blocking everything, muzzling everything and...

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THE SIX-FINGERED SWORD

Sent flying from Inigo's grip. He stands helpless only a moment. Then be drops to his knees, bows his head, shuts his eyes.

INIGO

Kill me quickly.

MAN IN BLACK

I would as soon destroy a stained glass window as an artist like yourself. However, since I can't have you following me either –

And he dunks Inigo's head with his heavy sword handle. Inigo pitches forward unconscious.

MAN IN BLACK

Please understand, I hold you in the highest respect.

He grabs his scabbard and takes off after the Princess and we...
 

CUT TO:

CLOSE UP – VIZZINI

VIZZINI

Inconceivable!

PULL BACK TO REVEAL

Vizzini, staring down from a narrow mountain path, as far below the Man In Black can be seen running. Fezzik, carrying the Princess, stands alongside. It's a little later in the morning.

VIZZINI

Give her to me.

(grabs Buttercup starts off)

Catch up with us quickly.

FEZZIK

(starting to panic)

What do I do?

VIZZINI

Finish him, finish him. Your way.

FEZZIK

Oh, good, my way. Thank you, Vizzini.

(little pause)

Which way is my way?

CUT TO:

A COUPLE OF ROCKS

Nothing gigantic. Vizzini points to them. There is a large boulder nearby.

VIZZINI

Pick up one of those rocks, get behind the boulder, and in a few minutes, the Man in Black will come running around the bend. The minute his head is in view, hit it with the rock!

As Vizzini and Buttercup hurry away.

FEZZIK

(little frown; softly)

My way's not very sportsmanlike.

He grabs one of the rocks and plods behind the boulder and we –
 

DISSOLVE TO:

THE MAN IN BLACK

Racing up the mountain trail. Ahead is a bend in the trail. He sees it, slows. Then he stops, listening.

Satisfied by the silence, he starts forward again and as he rounds the bend – a rock flies INTO FRAME, shattering on a boulder inches in front of him.

CUT TO:

FEZZIK

He moves into the mountain path. He has picked up another rock and holds it lightly.

FEZZIK

I did that on purpose. I don't have to miss.

MAN IN BLACK

I believe you – So what happens now?

FEZZIK

We face each other as God intended. Sportsmanlike. No tricks, no weapons, skill against skill alone.

MAN IN BLACK

You mean, you'll put down your rock and I'll put down my sword, and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people?

FEZZIK

(gently)

I could kill you now.

He gets set to throw, but the Man In Black shakes his head, takes off his sword and scabard, begins the approach toward the Giant.

MAN IN BLACK

Frankly, I think the odds are slightly in your favor at hand fighting.

FEZZIK

It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercise.

He flips the rock away.

CUT TO:

THE MOUNTAIN PATH AND THE TWO MEN

The Man In Black is not now and has never been a shrimp. But it's like he wasn't even there, Fezzik towers over him so much.

There is a moment's pause, and then the Man In Black dives at Fezzik's chest, slams him several tremendous blows in the stomach, twists his arm severely, slips skillfully into a beautifully applied bear hug, and in general makes any number of terrific wrestling moves.

Fezzik just stands there, kind of taking in the scenery. Finally the Man In Black pushes himself away, stares up at the Giant.

MAN IN BLACK
Look are you just fiddling around with me or what?

FEZZIK

I just want you to feel you're doing well. I hate for people to die embarrassed.

They get set to begin again. Then suddenly –
 

CUT TO:

FEZZIK

As he jumps forward with stunning speed for anyone his size and reaches for the Man In Black who drops to his knees, spins loose, and slips between the Giant's legs.

FEZZIK

You're quick.

MAN IN BLACK

And a good thing too.

FEZZIK

(getting set for another onslaught)

Why do you wear a mask? Were you burned by acid, or something like that?

MAN IN BLACK

Oh no. It's just that they're terribly comfortable. I think everyone will be wearing them in the future.