An American Werewolf in Paris

IN THE ALLEY

Terrence's zombie jerks with sudden pain.

TERRENCE

Oh shit! No! Andy, don't let them take me back there!

andy

The ADM! Quickly! Where is it?!

TERRENCE'S ROOM

ZZT! They zap him again.

IN THE BACK ALLEY

andy

Where is it! Please!

TERRENCE

AHHH!! The wine cellar!! In a bottle of Chateau Margaux. A metal cylinder... Don't... Don't- AAAAH!

Another zap. The undead Terrence twists his face in pain. In the background, Serafine appears at the mouth of the alley. Terrence croaks out a few last words.

TERRENCE

Lies! All lies! Ahhhh!!!

Andy turns towards Serafine, then back to his uncle, but Terrence is gone.

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM

Terrence's face is contorted with pain. The EKG monitor shows a weak but regular heartbeat. The doctor pulls off his mask and wipes his brow. The other technicians congratulate him.

IN THE ALLEY

Serafine approaches. Andy runs up to join her.

andy

I saw him. Just before those bastards zapped him back. The ADM is in the wine cellar, in a bottle of Chateau Margaux.

serafine

I didn't know he had a wine cellar.

andy

Guess that's why he hid it there. Let's go.

They run out of the alley and see GASTON jump on his hopped-up Kawasaki enduro.

serafine

Oh shit! He must have heard us.

Gaston sees them, gives them the finger and tears off down the street.

andy

Dammit! C'mon!

They run to Serafine's Vespa- the tires are slashed. Enraged, she kicks it over.

serafine

That bastard! Fuck!

Andy looks around desperately. A GUY pulls his motorcycle out of its parking spot and starts up the street towards Andy. Andy jumps out in front of the accelerating bike and grabs the handlebars, stopping it short, sending the rider tumbling forward, o ver Andy. He lands on his butt in the street and starts yelling at Andy, who climbs on the bike.

andy

Sorry... I'll bring it back.

Serafine hops on the back and they burn rubber down the street after Gaston. Music cue: CCR's "Bad Moon on the Rise". They screech around the corner onto

SAINT GERMAIN BOULEVARD

It's red lights as far as the eye can see. Andy grits his teeth and accelerates towards the cluster of traffic stopped at the first light.

serafine

Oh merde!

She shuts her eyes as Andy zooms between the rows of stopped cars and roars through the red light. SCREECH!! Crossing cars slam on their brakes and swerve to avoid the speeding bike. Andy bears down on the next red light.

serafine

Are you crazy!?

andy

Before Hemingway, there was Starsky and Hutch.

Andy speeds through more stopped cars and runs the next red light. SCREECH!! More swerving cars. Andy has to swerve himself to avoid one. He bears down on the next light. Meanwhile...

GASTON

is stopped on his bike, casually talking on a cellular phone, two red lights ahead of Andy and Serafine. He hears their bike and turns to see them zoom through the intersection in back of him. Gaston curses, puts the phone in his pocket and twists his throttle, accelerating through the red light.

ANDY AND SERAFINE

gain on Gaston. They're seventy five yards behind him.

GASTON

pulls a pistol and aims over his shoulder. BANG! He fires back at them.

SERAFINE

pulls her pistol out. Both bikes roar through another red light.

A POLICE CAR pulls out onto the boulevard and turns on its flashing lights and siren and pursues the bikes. The traffic lights turn green.

Gaston leads by fifty yards. The cop car pulls alongside Andy and Serafine. She discreetly pockets her gun. The COP in the passenger seat aims his gun at Andy.

cop

(French)

Pull over! Now!

andy

Shit!

There's no choice. They pull over. GASTON speeds safely away, looking back at them and laughing. The cop car stops ahead of them and the COPS get out, guns drawn.

FIRsT Cop

(French)

Hands in the air! Now!

Andy and Serafine put up their hands. The first cop goes back to check the police radio, which is beeping. The second cop keeps his gun aimed at Andy's head. He's furious.

second cop

(French)

Hot shot huh? You know how many officers die in high speed chases?

serafine

(French)

Moron! The guy ahead of us has a gun! He's the one you should stop!

second cop

Shut up! I don't need you to tell me my job. It's always "the other guy"!

serafine

He's going to kill people you ignorant shithead!

second cop

Okay! That's it! You're under arrest! Maybe you'll learn some respect in jail!

Serafine curses again. Andy tries to calm her down. The arguing escalates... In the car, the first cop is talking on the radio.

first cop

Really?

He turns, looks out his window and sees

RENE AND FRANCOIS

parked in their unmarked car. Rene is talking with him on the radio. Francois waves.

THE SECOND COP

is trying to put handcuffs on Serafine. She's still screaming at him. He's incensed. The first cop gets out of the car and walks up to them.

first cop

(to Andy and Serafine)

You can go.

His partner looks at him, incredulous, red-faced.

second cop

(French- to first cop)

WHAT!?

first cop

(ignores 2nd cop)

Drive safely.

andy

Merci.

Serafine smiles at the second cop. Andy peels out, races through the red light and disappears down the boulevard. The cops watch them go, then turn to each other. The second cop is apoplectic- about to explode.

INT. UNMARKED CAR

Rene and Francois speed off to keep pace with Andy. Rene is dialing his cellular phone. As they pass the other police car, we glimpse the two cops in an angry shoving match against the car. Rene's call goes through.

INT. SAINT SEVERIN CHURCH

Leduc is on the balcony, studying the stained glass panels and consulting an old book. The cellular phone in his coat pocket rings. An OLD PRIEST nearby frowns at him.

leduc

(French- into phone)

Hello.

(Pause)

I'll meet you there in ten minutes.

He hangs up. The priest is still frowning at him. Leduc shrugs gruffly- "what do you want from me?" and turns back to the stained glass.

As the church bells sound ten o'clock we cut to different panels: Several scenes of werewolves terrorizing people. A scene where some people mix potions and dump a strange flower into a cauldron. Another shows an evil looking man shaking his arm defian tly at a frowning sun- though he is human his raised arm is the enlarged, hairy limb of a werewolf. Another shows a saint throwing the strange flower into a fire in the town square.

leduc

(French)

Thank God for Saint Severin.

The bells strike ten. Leduc checks his watch, closes his book and hurries off.

EXT. TERRENCE'S APT. BUILDING

Music cue: "Evil" by Howlin' Wolf. Gaston stops, jumps off his bike, and runs into the court yard.

ANDY AND SERAFINE

speed along on the bike, weaving through narrow side streets.

GASTON

riding the wire cage elevator in the apartment building down to the basement. He gets out and walks down the dank hallway, past several padlocked doors. He stops at one with a MCDERMOTT nameplate. He's about to shoot it off, then looking around, thinks again. He grabs the lock and, grimacing with the effort, twists it off with his bare hands.

ANDY AND SERAFINE

stuck behind a garbage truck on a narrow street. Andy hops the curb and races down the sidewalk, scattering pedestrians.

GASTON

flicks on the light switch in the wine cellar. There are six large racks of wine bottles. He walks past them, scanning the bottles. He stops at the third rack and removes a bottle. The label reads "Chateau Margaux". He tries to peer inside, but it's to o hard to see. Instead, he hurls it at the wall- SMASH!! Wine sprays everywhere, but no metal cylinder. He grabs another bottle. SMASH!! Just wine. He grabs another...

ANDY AND SERAFINE

arrive in front of the apartment and hop off their bike. Serafine eyes GASTON'S BIKE hatefully. Andy pulls her along.

serafine

Wait a second...

She pulls out her gun. BLAM! BLAM! She blasts the gas tank- WOOF! The bike goes up in a fireball. Serafine nods, satisfied. Andy looks at her like she's nuts. They rush into the courtyard.

GASTON

throws another bottle. SMASH! Just wine. The floor is awash in the pricey Burgundy. He throws another bottle. SMASH! Nothing. He licks his fingers. He's enjoying this...

SERAFINE AND ANDY

In the elevator, going down, maddeningly slowly. Through the window they can see the full moon in the sky. Andy checks his watch. They look at each other nervously.

GASTON

Throws another- SMASH! A small METAL CYLINDER clinks as it bounces on the floor. Gaston picks it up and smiles. BANG! A gunshot hits Gaston in the arm- he drops the cylinder. Serafine and Andy stand in the doorway.

serafine

Dirty bastard...

Serafine fires again- BANG! The shot misses as Gaston hits the deck and draws his gun in one very fast motion, taking aim at Andy who's rushing towards him.

gaston

That's far enough!

Andy stops, Gaston's gun aimed at his chest. Serafine steps slowly towards Gaston, her gun aimed at him.

gaston

(to Serafine)

Another step and he's dead!

andy

Go ahead Serafine. Blow him away.

Serafine stops. The three of them stand there in a close triangle, the metal cylinder on the floor between them. It's a Mexican standoff... in Paris. Then...

claude (O.S.)

Drop the gun!

Claude is in the doorway holding a pistol. Serafine sees him and turns back to Gaston, smiling.

serafine

(to Gaston)

You heard him. Do it!

Gaston just smiles back at her. Claude steps forwards and cocks his gun against Serafine's head.

claude

I said drop the gun.

Serafine's expression turns confused, horrified. Andy is shocked. She drops the gun. Claude picks it up and pockets it, keeping his gun on Serafine, who stares at him, aghast.

andy

You bastard! God! I should've known. You wanted the cure all for yourself!

gaston

Cure!? Ha-ha-ha!

Andy and Serafine react with confusion to Gaston's outburst. Claude picks up the metal cylinder and unscrews its cap with his free hand. He slides out a vial filled with amber fluid and holds it to up to the light. He smiles.

claude

No, it's no cure. It's something much more interesting.

serafine

You fucking liar!

claude

(with mock alarm)

Oh, did I hurt the little girl's feelings? Well excusez moi...

(CONTINUED...)

CLAUDE (Cont'd)

I confess my desire for ADM is quite "intense". So I deceived you and our poor friend Terry- a competent technician, but let's face it, a bit naive. "The great cure for lycanthropy!" Hmph. He didn't have the vision to grasp the potential of ADAM, until it was too late. And even then, he came rushing down to tell me, as if I would be just as shocked! Ha.

He pockets the vial, pulls out the white "cyanide" tablet and pops it in his mouth. Andy reacts with shock.

claude

(off Andy's look, crunching up tablet in his mouth)

Oh this? Rolaids. I had a midnight snack that... disagreed with me.

Serafine's been doing a slow burn. She explodes and lunges at Claude, knocking his gun out of his hand.

serafine

Fucking traitor!

She picks Claude up and hurls him across the room. CRASH!! Claude smashes into a rack of wine bottles. Serafine jumps after him and dives on top of him pummeling him in a blind rage. Andy looks at her, agog.

andy

Wait a second...

He and Gaston notice Claude's gun at the same time. They both dive for it. Andy grabs it but Gaston steps on his hand and aims his gun down at him.

gaston

You want to be cured?