AntZ

                         BARBATUS
               Over the TOOOOOOOOOOOOO-OP!!!

     Z is swept along and up the side of the stump as thousands of
     ants invade the colony through every possible entrance.
     Up...over the lip of the stump...and down inside, to the very
     middle of the termite colony...

     Into a disquietingly peaceful scene.   They're in the middle
     of the hollowed-out trunk, and ants keep pouring in -- but
     there's not a termite to be seen.  Barbatus looks around
     suspiciously.

                         BARBATUS
               It's too damn quiet.

     Then we hear a strange tapping noise.  Barbatus looks over,
     and sees that Z's teeth are chattering with fear.

                         BARBATUS
               Don't be scared, kid.  Barbatus's
               got yer back.

                         Z
                      (petrified)
               Maybe they went out for the evening.
               Let's leave them a message and head
               home.

                         COLONEL
                      (ignoring him)
               Light it up!

     A nearby soldier ant take a firefly out of his knapsack and
     pinches him.  The firefly, yelling "Yipe!  Yipe!  Yipe!",
     shoots into the air like a flare, lighting up the interior of
     the stump with eery, shifting luminescence.

     Then we notice, hollowed into the inside of the stump like
     innumerable pockmarks, termite holes staring out upon the
     stump...and, with an unearthly ROAR, we see the first of
     hundreds of termites emerging to pour into the center of the
     tree, right onto the ant army.

                         COLONEL
               They're here!!!

                         BARBATUS
                      (to Z)
               Keep your head down!

     Within moments, Z finds himself in the middle of a
     BLOODBATH.  The ants have broken into the colony, but are
     taking heavy losses from the gigantic, blind, acid-spewing
     termites.  The battle scene is as sprawling and chaotic as
     something out of Braveheart. In a few QUICK SHOTS from Z's
     perspective, we see:

     -- A squad of ants rushes towards a termite soldier, but are
     literally melted into smoking heaps of flesh by a jet of acid
     from its forehead...

     -- A termite warrior is overwhelmed by a crowd of ants and is
     pulled to pieces with hideous ripping sounds...

     -- Another termite warrior takes on an ant soldier one on one
     and slowly crushes his head in his huge jaws...

                         Z
                      (looking around)
               Guys!  Guys!  It isn't too late for
               all of us to just talk this over!

     Just then, a termite burst up from the ground and turns to
     face Z.  Z is dwarfed by this hulking, roaring, drooling
     monstrosity.

                         Z
               Wait!  Please!  Acid makes me come
               out in spots!  -- Could I just say I
               have always had the greatest respect
               for your species?  I mean, eating
               wood -- why didn't I think of that?
               I --

     The termite rears, getting ready to melt Z, when OOF! he's
     knocked backwards by...

                         Z
               BARBATUS!  You -- you saved my life!

                         BARBATUS
               Don't get all sappy about it!

     As Barbatus and some other soldiers kill the termite, the
     Colonel strides up to Z, puffing on a cigar.

                         COLONEL
               I love the smell of formic acid in
               the morning.

                         Z
               Look out!

     A stream of termite acid engulfs the colonel, instantly
     burning him to a cinder clutching a still-burning cigar; Z's
     paratroop buddies turn in terror to see a herd of termites
     rumbling towards them.  Z, terrified, dives into the hole
     that the huge termite made...

     INT. TERMITE TUNNEL - NIGHT

     ...and tumbles headlong into a corridor of the termite mound.
     The corridors here are primitive, caveman-like, pocked with
     jagged access holes.

     No sooner has Z landed in the tunnel than a termite comes
     burrowing out from one of the side walls, snapping at Z's
     head.  Z just avoids getting decapitated, and digs straight
     through the wall in order to escape...

     INT. TERMITE QUEEN'S CHAMBER - NIGHT

     ...straight into the hub of the entire termite complex -- the
     Queen's chamber.  This is nothing like the civilized court of
     the ant colony -- it's a huge, stinking, fetid dungeon whose
     walls are held up by one massive (to Z) column of piled
     stones.

     The termite queen, a repulsive, slimy, squirming, foot-long
     monster, is attended by a crew of diminutive, blind termite
     nurses.  The queen turns to look Z right in the eye.

                         Z
               Excuse me.  I seem to be lost, and I
               was wondering if you could give me --

     Before Z can say, "directions", the queen gives out a
     piercing, blood-curdling shriek.  The nurses start shrieking
     too.

                         Z
                      (backing away)
               I'll let myself out.

     But the queen's shriek has summoned a soldier termite -- the
     biggest one we've seen yet -- who is charging headlong at Z,
     jaws snapping open and shut like huge scissors.

                         Z
                      (backing away)
               Shoo! -- Torro!  Torro!

     At the last moment, Z jumps out of the way -- and the termite
     runs headfirst into the supporting column of the chamber.  As
     if on a spring release, the termite's jaws clamp shut -- and
     shatter the base of the column.  The walls of the room begin
     to rumble...

     The termite turns to eat Z...but is crushed by a stone
     falling from the ceiling, which gives a final shudder and
     collapses, raining earth and stones down on the queen.

     As the walls of the chamber crumble, melees of ants and
     termites pour into the room from the corridors around and
     above...they keep struggling until...

                         ANT OFFICER
                      (points at Z)
               He's killed their Queen!

                         Z
               Hey, I'm sorry, it was a mistake --

                         ANT OFFICER
               VICTORY!!!

     We can see that the termite warriors, deprived of their
     leader, are suddenly confused and directionless, easy prey
     for the ants.

                         Z
                      (facetious)
               This is terrific!   Let's exact
               crippling war reparations!  Let's set
               up a puppet government!

                         ANT OFFICER
               Let's slaughter them all!

     The ants set about killing the disoriented termites when...we
     hear another rumble coming from the outside...the ants look
     up confusedly...

     ...And a (from the ant's point of view) five-hundred foot
     long tongue bursts through the top of the chamber with a
     CRASH.  The ten or so ants standing directly below are
     smashed by the tongue, which squirts out a spray of saliva
     around the crater.  As quick as it appeared, the tongue
     retracts, with a hideous SLUUURPING sound.  We can now see
     the end of the snout of an ant-eater poking through a hole in
     the ceiling high above...

                         ANT OFFICER
               INCOMING!

     The tongue comes down again, smashing some more ants, whose
     bodies are slurped up by the tongue...the ants scatter, but
     to no avail, as the tongue comes smashing down again and
     again...

     Z heads into a side corridor as the tongue smashes down
     again, barely missing him!

     Z retreats along the corridor as the tongue searches for him,
     across the tunnel from intersecting access-tunnels, getting
     closer and closer to Z, dragging more and more screaming ants
     and struggling termites...

     ....Then the tongue disappears.  Silence.  Z wipes his brow...

     And we hear a thunderous SNIFFING noise as the anteater
     searches for more prey... and the tongue starts rumbling down
     the corridor right towards Z, the tip squirming as it
     ricochets along the walls!

     Z gets up and runs, the tongue lapping towards him,
     reminiscent of the stone sphere that nearly crushed Indiana
     Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark!  The walls disintegrate
     under the pressure of the tongue, which gets closer to
     Z...closer...

     ...and just misses him as Z tumbles out of the stump and down
     to the ground...Z sits there, dazed, as we see the huge form
     of the anteater withdraw its tongue and, with a final
     contented burp, shuffle off into the distance.

     EXT. TERMITE STUMP - MORNING

     Z makes his way across the corpse-strewn battlefield, an
     expression of horror on his face.

                         BARBATUS (O.S.)
               Z!  Over here!

                         Z
                      (hopeful)
               Barbatus?

     Z looks down at his feet, where Barbatus's still-living,
     decapitated head is looking up at him.

                         Z
                      (shocked)
               Barbatus!

                         BARBATUS
               Be honest, kid -- am I hurt bad?

                         Z
               No, no, you're...lookin' good.
               You've got good color in your cheeks.

                         BARBATUS
               No -- I can see it in your eyes.  I'm
               a goner.  It's alright, Z.  In this
               ant's army, a soldier's life ain't
               worth a sack of fungus.
                      (he winces)
               I can't feel my legs...

                         Z
               Hang in there, buddy!  You can make
               it!  Just -- take deep breaths, I'll
               try and find your body -- it's gotta
               be around here somewhere!

                         BARBATUS
                      (gasping)
               I wonder...what...was it all...for...

                         Z
               Barbatus, hang on -- Barbatus!!

                         BARBATUS
               Don't make my mistake, kid...
               don't...be a grunt...your whole
               life...

     Barbatus dies, leaving Z heartbroken.

                                              CUT TO:

     INT. EARLY MEGA-TUNNEL - DAY

     Weaver is "passing" as a worker, working alongside much
     smaller worker ants.  He actually loves the work.  He's
     throwing up dirt like a bulldozer.  He's so enthusiastic, he
     scoops up a WHOLE ANT in his shovel and tosses him aside.
     Azteca, who's standing next to him in line, is shocked by,
     and a little attracted to, this turbo-worker.

                         AZTECA
               Hey, slow it down, big boy.  You're
               making the rest of us look bad...How
               come I haven't seen you around here
               before?

                         WEAVER
                      (covering)
               I'm new...I was born yesterday.

                         AZTECA
               Tell me about it.

                         WEAVER
               Nobody told me digging was so much
               fun!  You pick up the dirt, you move
               it, you pick it up again, you move it
               again -- lots of repetitions, you
               exercise the forceps, and the
               pincers --

                         AZTECA
                      (ogling him)
               Mmm, yes, I see what you mean...

     While Azteca is checking out the hunky new worker, work has
     effectively stopped...clods are piling up behind Weaver.  A
     Foreman comes striding down the line, furious.

                         FOREMAN
               What's the holdup here?!

     Weaver whips his shovel up to his shoulder and salutes, as if
     he's dealing with a superior officer.

                         WEAVER
               Sorry, sir -- I was just having a
               little chat with my friend --