Friends六人行 第二季英文剧本(261-270页)

RACHEL: We love you, we're here for you.

JOEY: Yeah good luck, good luck.

PHOEBE: Thanks. [gets out of the cab]

JOEY: Hey Rach, you uh, you want some sandwich?

RACHEL: Ohh, what is in that?

JOEY: Olive loaf and ham spread, no mayo.

RACHEL: No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross.

PHOEBE: [a little dog starts attacking her leg] Hey, hey, no, oh oh.

RACHEL: Run Phoebe run.

PHOEBE: No no no, doggie please. Oh, I do so wanna love all animals, please no.

JOEY: Get him a bone, get a bone. You gotta bone?

RACHEL: Are you kidding me?

PHOEBE: Look kibbles, bits. Oh God, alright, get the hell off my leg you yippity piece of crap. [Flings the dog off and jumps in the cab. The dog keeps jumping up to the window.] Ok, alright, we have a problem.

JOEY: Well why don't you just reach out and take his trampoline.

RACHEL: Ok, here, I know what we can do. [grabs Joey's sadwich and throws it out the window]

JOEY: Hey, hey, hey no.

RACHEL: Ok, doggie get the- aahhh. Ok go get the sandwich, get the sandwich doggie. [dog ignores the sandwich] Good doggie get the sandwich, get the...ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say?

JOEY: Well if he's not gonna eat it, I will.

PHOEBE: Are you crazy?

JOEY: Phoebs, he's just a little dog. [turns back to the car window and the dog is halfway through it.] Ahhh.

[Scene: Central Perk. Chandler and Ross are sitting at the couch.]

CHANDLER: Hey.

ROSS: What?

CHANDLER: Do you have to be a Century 21 real-estate agent to get to wear those really cool jackets?

ROSS: Do you say this stuff to girls?

BIG BULLY: Hehehehey, isn't that the guy who used to wear your hat?

LITTLE BULLY: And look where they're sitting.

ROSS: You're joking, right? You guys just walked through the door.

BIG BULLY: Maybe we didn't make it clear enough.

LITTLE BULLY: Yeah.

BIG BULLY: This couch belongs to us.

CHANDLER: Alright, I'll tell you what, you call the couch and then, and then we'll call the couch, and we'll see who it comes to.

BIG BULLY: You know what I keep wondering? Why you two are still sitting here.

ROSS: Alright, that's it. I've had enough of this, alright. Gunther, these guys are trying to take our seat.

GUNTHER: Fellas, these guys were here first.

BIG BULLY: Oh, sorry, I didn't realize.

LITTLE BULLY: Sorry.

GUNTHER: There you go.

ROSS: Thank you Gunther. We didn't want to have to go and do that.

LITTLE BULLY: He told on us?

BIG BULLY: You told on us?

ROSS: Well pal, you didn't give me much of a choice. [flicks the ends of the big bully's tie]

CHANDLER: Don't play with his things.

ROSS: I know.

BIG BULLY: Alright, let's take this outside.

ROSS: Let's, let's take this outside? Who talks like that?

BIG BULLY: The guy that's about to kick your ass talks like that.

CHANDLER: You had to ask.

ROSS: Yeah.

[the bullies grab the back of the couch that Ross and Chandler are sitting in and tip back]

ROSS: Ok, ok look, see, the thing is we're, we're not gonna fight you guys.

LITTLE BULLY: Well then here's the deal, you won't have to so long as never ever show your faces in this coffee house ever again.

CHANDLER: I think you played the Gunther card too soon.

[Scene: Back in the cab in front of Phoebe's dad's house.]

JOEY: Hey Phoeb's, I think you're good to go.

PHOEBE: Yeah, I don't know.

RACHEL: What's the matter?

PHOEBE: I just think that this was a really bad sign, ya know. I mean, like the beast at the threshold, you know. It's just like, I have no family left, ya know. I mean except for my grandmother, you know, but let's face it, she's not gonna be around forever, despite what she says. And I have a sister who I've barely spoken to since we like shared a womb. I don't know, this is my real father and I just, I want things to be like just right.

RACHEL: Yeah Phoebe, I completely understand.

JOEY: Yeah, whatever you need. Hey, you wanna go home?

PHOEBE: Ok, thanks. Sorry, again

[She starts the cab and pulls forward. We hear a squish and a dog yelp.]

PHOEBE: [innocently] What was that?

JOEY: Uhh, I'm guessing the threshold's clear now.

[Scene: Monica and Rachel's apartment. Joey is eating breakfast, Rachel has just gotten up, and Monica is on the phone.]

MONICA: I wanna buy 5 shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. C'mon time is money my friend. Thank you. Wooo.

RACHEL: Time is money my friend?

JOEY: Yeah, you missed, 'Takes money to make money,' and uh, 'Don't make me come down there and kick your wall street butt.'

MONICA: Hey, I made $17 before breakfast, what have you done?

JOEY: Well uh, I had breakfast here so technically I saved $3.50.

RACHEL: How did you make $17.

MONICA: Well, my financially challenged friends, I split my money and I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY.

JOEY: How come those?

MONICA: Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Eric Estrada. And ZXY becuase I think it sounds zexy.

RACHEL: What happened to uh, MEG.?

MONICA: MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto is get out before they go down.

JOEY: That is so not my motto.

PHOEBE: [enters] Hey.

RACHEL: Hey Phoebs. Oh hey, how's the dog?

PHOEBE: Ok, I talked to the vet, people are so nice upstate. Anyway, he said that the little fella's gonna be ok and I can pick him up tomorrow.

JOEY: Good.

RACHEL: Oh, thank God.

PHOEBE: Yeah, but he did have to have a bunch of stitches and he said that only once in a blue moon does a dog's ear grow back so...still hoping.

RACHEL: Ok, so Phoebe, now are you gonna call your dad and let him know that his dog is ok?

PHOEBE: I, I don't wanna meet my father over the phone. What am I gonna say, like 'Hi, I'm Phoebe, the daughter you abandoned. Oh, by the way, I broke your dog.'

JOEY: Hey Phoebs, if you want, I'll do it.

PHOEBE: Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. [goes over and grabs the phone that's sitting by Monica]

MONICA: DON'T...be too long with the phone.

RACHEL: She'll be a much better friend when the market closes.

JOEY: [dials the phone] It's a woman.

PHOEBE: So talk to her.

JOEY: [in a fake voice] Uhh, hello Miss Buffay. I know where your dog is. I want you to know that he'll be returned to you, almost as good as new, within, within 24 hours. Uh, goodbye. [hangs up]

RACHEL: Why the voice.

JOEY: [in the voice] Hard to say.

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's apartment. Ross is sitting at the bar, Chandler serves up two mugs of hot water.]

CHANDLER: Your cappucino sir.

ROSS: Thank you.

[they both pour in packets of cappucino mix]