Friends六人行 第二季英文剧本(281-290页)

RACHEL: Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could look at the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes.

CHANDLER: Well, actually just one birthday flan.

RACHEL: What?

CHANDLER: It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert...Look talk to Monica, she's on the food committee.

[Time lapse. Chandler runs out of the bathroom.]

CHANDLER: Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,' and stuck her tounge down my throat. I love this party.

JOEY: Quick volleyball question.

CHANDLER: Volleyball.

JOEY: Yeah, we set up a court in your room. Uh, you didn't really like that grey lamp, did you?

CHANDLER: Joey, a woman just stuck her tounge down my throat, I'm not even listening to you.

GIRL'S VOICE: Dennis.

CHANDLER: Ok, that's me. [runs back]

RACHEL: Listen honey, can you keep dad occupied, I'm gonna go talk to mom for a while.

ROSS: Ok, do you have any ideas for any openers?

RACHEL: Uhh, let's just stay clear of 'I'm the guy that's doing you daughter' and you should be ok.

[Back in Monica's party]

MONICA: Ok people, I want you to take a piece of paper, here you go, and write down your most embarassing memory. Oh, and I do ask that when you're not using the markers, you put the caps back on them because they will dry out.

[Back in Chandler and Joey's party]

ROSS: Hi Dr. Greene. So, uh, how's everything in the uh, vascular surgery....game?

MR. GREENE: It's not a game Ross, a woman died on my table today.

ROSS: I'm sorry. See that's the good thing about my job. All the dinosaurs on my table are already dead.

[Back in Monica's party]

MONICA: Listen you guys, I don't mean to be a pain about this but, um, I've noticed that some of you are just placing them on. You wanna push the caps until you hear them click. [she demonstrates, Gunther starts to walk to the door] Gunther, where're you going?

GUNTHER: I um, was sorta thinking about maybe...

MONICA: No. No you can't go. No this is fun. Come on we're just getting started. Here, here's your marker.

PHOEBE: Listen if you wanna go, just go.

GUNTER: No, she'll yell at me again.

PHOEBE: Alright, I can get you out.

GUNTHER: What?

PHOEBE: Shh. In a minute, I'm gonna create a diversion. When I do, walk quickly to the door and don't look back.

[Back at Chandler and Joey's party]

MR. GREENE: I think I need a drink.

ROSS: Oh, here, I, I'll get it for ya. Whad'ya want?

MR. GREENE: Scotch.

ROSS: Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in a glass.

MR. GREENE: Neat.

ROSS: Cool.

MR. GREENE: No no no, no no no, neat, as in no rocks.

ROSS: I know.

[Back at Monica's party]

MR. GREENE: Oh hello Ross, where have you been?

ROSS: Hi. Uh, I have been in the bathroom. Stay clear of the salmon mousse.

MRS. GREENE: Oh, scotch neat. Ya know, that's Rachel's father's drink.

ROSS: Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me? [walks out in the hallway, Mr. Greene is walking out of Chandler and Joey's apartment] Hey, hey, where you uh, sneakin off to mister?

MR. GREENE: I'm getting my cigarettes out of my jacket.

ROSS: No. no.

MR. GREENE: Whad'ya mean no?

ROSS: No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there, it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back in there and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.

MR. GREENE: Get my glasses too.

ROSS: All righty roo. [closes the door] What a great moment to say that for the first time. [goes to get the cigarettes and glasses]

MONICA: Ok, the first person's most embarassing memory is, 'Monica, your party sucks.' Very funny.

PHOEBE: Oh no, ooh, ooh, did somebody forget to use a coaster?

MONICA: What? [she runs over to where Phoebe is, Phoebe signals for Gunther to go] I don't see anything.

PHOEBE: Great, I'm seeing water rings again.

MRS. GELLER: Ross, whose glasses are those?

ROSS: Mine.

MRS. GREENE: You wear bi-focals?

ROSS: Um-hmm. [puts them on] I have a condition, apparently, that I require two different sets of focals.

MRS. GREENE: Did you know my husband has glasses just like that?

RACHEL: Well those are very popular frames.

ROSS: Neil Sedaka wears them.

GUY: [to Phoebe] I hear you can get people out of here.

MRS. GREENE: Rachel, you didn't tell me your boyfriend smoked.

RACHEL: Yeah, like a chimney.

ROSS: Ohh, big smoker. [Packs the cigarettes and flings one on Mrs. Greene in the process. Finally gets one in his mouth and it look really out of place] Big big smoker. In fact I'm gonna go ou into the hallway and fire up this bad boy. [as he walks into the hall, he comes face to face with Mr. Greene]

MR. GREENE: Are you wearing my glasses?

ROSS: Yes. [pulls them off and hands them to Mr. Greene] I was just warming up the earpieces for you.

MR. GREENE: Thank you. Is that one of my cigarettes?

ROSS: [pulls the cigarette off his upper lip and hands it to Mr. Greene] Yeah, yes it is, I was just moistening the tip.

[Back in Monica's party. Phoebe is talking to a guy and two girls at the party.]

PHOEBE: Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out of here but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.

GIRL 1: What about my friend Victor?

PHOEBE: No, only the three of you, any more than that and she'll get suspicious.

GIRL 1: Alright, let me just get my coat.

PHOEBE: There isn't time. You must leave everything. They'll take care of you next door.

GIRL 1: Is it true they have beer?

PHOEBE: Everything you've heard is true.

[Back at Chandler and Joey's party. Everyone is dancing and having fun.]

MONICA: Could you guys please try to keep it down, we're trying to start a Boggle tournament.

[Chandler and Joey stop dancing and laugh at her]

MONICA: You, and you, you're supposed to be at my party. And Gunther! What are you doing here?

GUNTHER: Um [gestures to dance floor]

PHOEBE: [enters with the three people she got out] Ok, welcome to the fu-oh.

MONICA: Phoebe.

PHOEBE: Alright, I'm sorry but these people needed me. They work hard all week, it's Saturday night, they deserve to have a little fun. Go.

MONICA: Ya know, my party is fun. I mean, maybe it's a little quieter, less obvious sorta fun but, you know, if people would just give it a chance... [volleyball hits her in the head from behind]

[Back at Monica's party]

RACHEL: You want me to see a therapist?

MRS. GREENE: Sweetheart, you obviously have a problem. You've chosen a boyfriend exactly like your father.

RACHEL: Ok mom, you know what, fine, I'll make an appointment ok, but you know what, right now, I gotta go, I gotta go do a thing.

[Chandler and Joey's party]

MR. GREENE: Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt like Gulliver around that place.