Friends六人行 第三季英文剧本(41-50页)

Chandler: What's going on?
Monica: He's retiling my floor. (they both run to the bathroom)
Chandler: Yo!! Spackel boy! Get up!
Monica: Ah-ah-ah, now you started this, you will finish it.
Chandler: He started mine first!
Phoebe: Build the unit Cinderelly, lay the tile Cinderelly.
[Scene: Phoebe's, Phoebe and Frank are watching TV.]
Frank: Whoa! Big octopus.
Phoebe: Yeah. (phone rings and Phoebe answers it) 'Hello. (listens) Oh my God, I totally forgot! (listens) Well can't someone else do it. (listens) But, I have company. (listens) Yeah, no look, that's all right I'll come in.' (hangs up phone) Um, Frank, I'm really sorry but I have to go to work. It's-it's one of my regulars and he's insisting that I do 'um.
Frank: Hey, what kind of work do you do?
Phoebe: Oh! I'm a masseuse. I give people massages and stuff.
Frank: You-you work at one of those massage parlors?
Phoebe: Well, y'know we don't call it that, but yeah!
Frank: (starts laughing) Wow! That's wild! No, I had no idea.
Phoebe: All righty. I'll be back in-in a little bit. Unless you wanna come with me?
Frank: You mean like watch?
Phoebe: No, no, you can get one yourself. It'll be on the house! Y'know what are big sisters for?
Frank: Well, I don't think this, y'know.
Phoebe: No, no, no, I wouldn't do you myself, I mean that would be weird. Yeah, no, I'll get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun! Hey! Are you excited?
Frank: Yeah! Hey, do Monica and Rachel work there?
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's bathroom, Joey and Monica are admiring the new floor.]
Monica: It's beautiful! It's like the first bathroom floor there ever was. (Chandler tries to go to the bathroom) Whoa! Are you going in there for?
Chandler: What, like a number?
Ross: (entering) Hey!
Chandler: Hi! Bye! (runs to the bathroom)
Ross: Okay, I'm done with my choices, these are final. (holds up a little card)
Rachel: Well, it's about time.
Joey: Ooh, very official.
Ross: Oh, yeah, well y'know Chandler printed it up on his computer.
Monica: And who laminated it?
Ross: That would be me.
Rachel: All right let me see. (grabs the card) Uma Thurman, Winona Ryder, Elizabeth Hurely, Michelle Pfieffer, and Dorothy Hammel?
Ross: Hey, it's my list.
Rachel: Okay honey, you do realize she only spins like that on ice.
[Scene: Healing Hands Inc. (Phoebe's work) , Frank is being ushered in, by the arm, to the room Phoebe is in by another girl.]
Frank: Ow!-Ow!-Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Y'know, ow!
Phoebe: Hey!-Hey! What's going on?
Frank: She broke my arm.
Girl: He touched my fanny.
Frank: No, she touched mine first!
Girl: That's my job!
Frank: So wait, what's the deal here, I can have sex with you, but I can't touch you?
Phoebe and Girl: Ewww!!!
Phoebe: You can't have sex with her!
Girl: What'd you think I was, a hooker?
Frank: No, your a masseuse, it's cool, I'm not a cop.
Phoebe: Okay, Jasmine, can you, can you ask Mr. Whiffler if he can wait for like five minutes.
Jasmine: Fine. (starts to leave, and points at Frank) I don't like you!! (leaves)
Phoebe: (turns around and hits Frank) So that's what you thought I did!! God! That's not what I do!
Frank: Wait that's-that's, what that's not what you do?
Phoebe: Nooo! Why would you think that?
Frank: I don't know, I mean, y'know, this is the city y'know, I just, I mean, I don't know.
Phoebe: Whatever, it's the perfect end to the perfect weekend anyways.
Frank: Oh, wait, no your right, no it was perfect and I can't believe that I screwed it up so bad.
Phoebe: You really thought it was perfect?
Frank: Well, no, maybe-maybe it wasn't perfect, but y'know it was pretty cool, y'know, 'cause we had all those great talks y'know.
Phoebe: Yeah, um, which ones in particular were great for you?
Frank: Well y'know about the tongue thing, y'know, and how I told you about my likes and my dislikes...
Phoebe: I don't....
Frank: How-how I like to melt stuff, and how I dislike stuff that doesn't melt.
Phoebe: Right, okay, um-mm.
Frank: Yeah, y'know I feel like I can really talk to you 'cause y'know you're my sister, y'know.
Phoebe: Yeah, I guess I do, yeah.
Frank: Then I go feel your friend up and make you mad at me.
Phoebe: Well, I-I wasn't hopping mad, y'know.
Frank: You hopped a little bit. Yeah, I really sorry.
Phoebe: Okay. All right, this is my favourite part of the weekend, right now, this.
Frank: This?
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Frank: Oh come on we went, we went to Time Square, we found ninja stars, I almost got arm broken by a hooker...
Phoebe: She wasn't a hooker.
Frank: Well, when I tell my friends about her she will be.
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, everyone is there, helping to lift the entertainment center into place]
Chandler: Okay, on three. One....Two....
Joey: Why don't we just go on two.
Chandler: Why two?
Joey: Because it's faster.
Chandler: Yeah, I coulda counted to three like four times without all this 'two' talk.
Rachel: Oh!
Joey: All right, but in the future...
Ross: Okay!! Okay!!
Rachel: Come on!
Ross: Heavy thing, not getting lighter!
Chandler: Okay, one...two...
Joey: So we are going on two?
All: All right!! (they lift it into place, however there is one small problem, the unit is so long that it blocks some of both of their bedroom doors.)
Chandler: Oh, good job Joe.
Joey: Wow, it's big!
Chandler: Yeah-yeah, so big that it actually makes our doors look smaller!
Joey: Maybe, my ruler's wrong.
Phoebe: Maybe all the rulers are wrong.
Joey: Look it's not that bad. So what, it blocks a little of your door, a little of my door.
Chandler: Yeah, y'know what I got a better idea. How-how 'bout it blocks none of mine door and a lot of yours? (throws his shoulder into the center to try and move it, but it doesn't move.)
Joey: Yeah, listen, before I forget that side is still wet.
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel is serving some guy coffee.]
Rachel: Okay sir, um-mm, let see if I got this right. Ah, so this is a half-caf, double tall, easy hazel nut, non-fat, no foam, with whip, extra hot latte, right? (the guy nods) Okay, great. (she starts to walk away and under her breath) You freak.
(Isabella Rosselini enters)
Ross: (to Gunther) Thank you.
Isabella: (to Gunther) Um, coffee to go, please.
(Ross recognises her and goes over to the couch, mouthing 'Oh my God'
Ross: Isabella Rosselini. (points to her)
Monica: Are you serious? (they all look) Oh my God.
Ross: Damn! I can't believe I took her off my list.
Monica: Why? 'Cause otherwise you'd go for it?
Ross: Yeah, maybe.
Rachel: Oh-oh, you lie.
Ross: What you don't think I'd go up to her?
Rachel: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
Ross: Yeah, well missy, you better be glad that list is laminated.
Rachel: You know what honey, you go ahead, we'll call her an alternate.
Ross: Okay, hold my crawler.
Rachel: Okay.
Monica: Rach, are you really gonna let him do this?
Rachel: Honey, he's about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. I'm just sorry we don't got popcorn.
Ross: (to Isabella) Hi! Hi, I'm Ross, you don't know me, but I'm a big, big fan of yours. I mean, Blue Velvet, woo-oo hoo! Um, I was wondering if I could um, maybe buy you a cup of coffee? (Gunther hands her change) Or maybe reimburse you for that one?
Isabella: Aren't you with that girl over there? (points at Rachel, who waves back)
Ross: Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but that's okay, see we have an understanding, um, see we each have this list of five famous people, (gets his out) so I'm allowed to sleep with you. No, no, no, it's flattery.
Isabella: I'm sorry. (starts to leave)
Ross: Oh no, no, no, wait, wait, Isabella. Don't, don't just dismiss this so fast. I mean this is a once in a lifetime opportunity...
Isabella: Yeah, for you. Is that the list?
Ross: Um, yeah.
Isabella: May I see it?
Ross: Um, no.
Isabella: Come on! (grabs the list)
Ross: But, okay.
Isabella: (reading it) I'm not on the list!
Ross: Um, see, but that's not the final draft.
Isabella: It's laminated!
Ross: Yeah, um, okay see, you were, you were on the list but my friend, Chandler (Chandler waves) brought up the very good point that you are international, so I bumped you for Wynona Rider, local.
Isabella: Y'know it's ironic...
Ross: What?
Isabella: ...because I have a list of five goofy coffee house guys and yesterday I bumped you for that guy over there. (points at a guy and leaves)
Ross: (to the rest of the gang) We're just gonna be friends.
Closing Credits
[Scene: Chandler and Joey's, they are admiring the entertainment center]
Joey: Y'know what?
Chandler: Umm?
Joey: I bet 'ya ya I could fit in there. (points to a hole in the center)
Chandler: I've got five bucks says you can't.
Joey: Get out your checkbook, mister.
Chandler: Oh, I think I have the cash.
(Joey successfully enters the entertainment center, and Chandler closes the door on Joey.)
Joey: You are dogged man! I totally fit!
Chandler: Yeah, you got me. (picks up a 2x4 and puts it through the handles so that the doors won't open) I'm out five big ones! (puts the money in the crack between the door and frame) Here you go.
Joey: Thank you. Cha-ching! (Chandler starts to leave) Oh, well hello Mr. Lincoln. Better luck next time buddy. (Chandler leaves and closes the door) And the drinks are on me!
End

306 The One With The Flashback

[Scene: Central Perk, the whole gang is there including Janice.]
Janice: Janice has a question. Who of the six of you has sleep with the six of you?
Phoebe: Wow, it's like a dirty math problem.
Ross: I'm sorry the answer there would be...none of us.
Janice: Come on over the years none of you ever y'know, got drunk and stupid.
Joey: Well, that's really a different question.
Janice: I'm sorry I find it hard to believe that a group of people who spends as much time together as you guys do has never bumped uglies.
Joey: Well, there was that one time that Monica and Rachel got together.
Monica and Rachel: What?!!
Rachel: Excuse me, there was no time!
Joey: Okay, but let's say there was. How might that go?
Janice: Okay, okay, well then answer me this. Has any of you ever.... almost?
Rachel: Does anybody need more coffee?
Ross: Yeah, I'll take some.
Joey: Hey, there's a dog out there!
Opening Credits
[Scene: Monica and Phoebe's, three years earlier, Phoebe, Monica, and Ross are there]