Friends六人行 第八季英文剧本(141-150页)

in Ross’ apartment)
Chandler: Oh, great. We have to watch him do yoga in his underwear, but for this he closes the drapes!
Monica: Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? It’s here.
Chandler: Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it: don’t watch it.
Rachel: Why? You saw it? Is it scary?
Chandler: Well, let’s just say it’s ironic how footage of someone being born can make you want to kill yourself.
Rachel: Well, now, wait. Now I’m all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watch it with me.
Monica: No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!
Rachel: C’mon, seriously, you guys, you’re not going to make me watch this alone!
Monica: She’s right…of course not. Honey, get the tape.
Chandler: (with his arm all the way under the cushion, moving it around) This reminds me of a very specific part of the tape. (Chandler puts the tape in, and they all sit down) Okay, here we go.
Rachel: Okay. (watching the tape) Ooh, my! (Rachel jumps when the woman starts screaming) Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
Chandler: Why have I seen this thing three times?!
Monica: It’s…still beautiful.
Rachel: Uh! It’s horrible!
Monica: I know! I know, I’m so sorry for you!
Rachel: Oh, my God!
(Monica and Rachel both cover their eyes)
Chandler: Wait, you guys, look!
Rachel: What? Did her ass explode?!
Chandler: No, the baby’s out! Look, look!
Monica: Oh, look at those little fingers and toes!
Chandler: And look how happy the mom is now!
Monica: Oh…Rach!
Rachel: Oh, screw you guys, you don’t have to do it!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is getting coffee as Joey comes from…God knows where! Some back area of Central Perk around the corner that we’ve never seen! Weeeiiirrrddd….]
Ross: Hey, hey, man!
Joey: Hey, what’s up?
Ross: Uh…Mona just dumped me.
Joey: Oh, man, I’m sorry. Why?
Ross: Well, with everything that’s been going on lately, I haven’t exactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didn’t tell her I got Rachel pregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then I lied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for not breaking up with me sooner, you know?
Joey: Still, that really sucks, man. Especially on Valentine’s Day.
Ross: Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a date on Valentine’s Day? What’s going on, huh? Girl trouble?
Joey: Sort of.
Ross: Really?!
Joey: You don’t have to seem so happy about it.
Ross: Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.
Joey: Oh, I…I d—
Ross: Hey, whatever it is, I am sure it has happened to me. Y’know, actually once—once I got dumped during sex.
(Two girls sitting at a table next to them look up in disgust, and Ross and Joey move away)
Ross: Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?
Joey: Forget about it. It’s no big deal.
Ross: C’mon! Joey! What is it?
Joey: It’s nothing.
Ross: Hey, hey, it’s me. Why can’t you tell me?
Joey: Okay, uh…sit down. (they do) Um… there’s this woman that I like. A lot. But, uh…it can’t happen.
Ross: She’s not a Tribbiani?
Joey: No!
Ross: I knew it. So, is she someone from work?
Joey: Yes.
Ross: Well, uh, does she like you?
Joey: Sometimes I think maybe she could. But it doesn’t matter, because I can’t do anything about it.
Ross: Why not?
Joey: Well, it’s complicated. She’s with this other guy. For a long time. Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because we’re really good friends.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh… is he still in love with her?
Joey: No. I don’t think so.
Ross: Okay. Um… is he a good guy?
Joey: Yeah, he’s the best.
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Joey: Oh, I don’t know.
Ross: Joey, it’s worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
Joey: I do! So much! I can’t stop thinking about her! I can’t sleep, I—
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself.
Gunther: (placing a cup in front of Ross) Here’s your warm milk.
Ross: I’m going to…uh…I’m going to, um, put the bourbon in it at home.
Joey: Oh, yeah.
Ross: Anyway… seriously, uh…just…just talk to the guy, okay? And tell me how it goes. (walks towards the door until…)
Joey: It’s Rachel.
(Ross just stands in the doorway, for like a minute…Ahh! What’s going to happen next??!!! I can’t make it all the way through the Olympics!!!)
Closing Credits
[Scene: Ross and Rachel’s. Rachel is standing in front of the TV holding a video.]
Rachel: (thinking) You’re going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. Now, you’re going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it! (Rachel puts the tape in the VCR)
Woman on TV: I came to the big city to become a star! I’ll do…anything to make that happen!
Man on TV: Anything?
(Music starts playing…yes…you know what kind of music…)
Rachel: (thinking) Hmm…maybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.
End

816 The One Where Joey Tells Rachel

Lisa Kudrow: (voiceover) Previously on Friends
[Scene: Central Perk, Joey is talking to Ross]
Joey: There’s this woman, that I like.  A lot.  Well, it’s complicated.  She’s with this other guy.  For a long time.  And I could never do that to the guy, y’know?  ’Ccause we’re really good friends.
Ross: So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh… is he a good guy?
Joey: Yeah, he’s the best.
Ross: Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
Joey: Oh, I don’t know.
Ross: Joey, it’s worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
Joey: I do! So much! I can’t stop thinking about her! I can’t sleep, I—
Ross: Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happen to you, huh? You owe it to yourself. (Walks towards the door until…)
Joey: It’s Rachel.
[Fade to Black, then fade in again with Ross stopped at the doorway.]
Ross: (closes the door) Did you um—I’m sorry, did you just say it’s Rachel?
Joey: Yes.
Ross: Um, you…you like Rachel?
Joey: Yes. I like Rachel.
Ross: Rachel?!
Joey: (startled) Yeah, okay but look, buy uh—Hey-hey, y’know, y’know who else I like? You! And it-it doesn’t get said enough. I like you Ross.
Ross: But R-R-Rachel-Rachel?!
Joey: Yeah, but it’s not a big deal.
Ross: It’s not a big deal? Oh, I’m sorry I just…um, I…what about all the stuff you-you just said? I mean how about, I like—you-you can’t stop thinking about her. Like how you can’t sleep?
Joey: I’m an actor, y’know? As-as a group, we tend to be over dramatic.
Ross: Rachel who’s carrying my baby? Rachel?
Joey: Look no, I-I know it’s bad, and I know it’s wrong. Okay? But-but it’s not like anything’s ever gonna happen. Y’know? These-these are just feelings, they’re gonna go away.
Ross: Y’know what? I-I gotta go. (Starts to leave.)
Joey: Oh come on Ross! Hey Ross-Ross don’t…
Ross: (stops) I just—y’know—I-I just have one—Rachel?!
(He exits and starts to walk away, passes a window, stops, and says "Rachel?!" again. Joey sighs and turns around to face Gunther.)
Gunther: Rachel?!!
Opening Credits
[Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Chandler are on the couch.]
Rachel: Oh-oh! Okay, she’s kicking!
Chandler: Oh! (Puts his hand on her belly.) She’s growing inside you.
Rachel: Whoa!!
Chandler: Oh! (Pulls his hand away.)
Rachel: Wow that was a big one.
Chandler: I think that’s the youngest girl ever to reject me.
Phoebe: (entering) Oh hey you guys!
Chandler: Oh hey!
Rachel: Hi!
Phoebe: Hey listen let me ask you, do you believe in soul mates?
Rachel: Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. That’s why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. He’ll find me.
Phoebe: Uh-huh, (To Chandler) and you?
Chandler: No. I mean I believe that uh, certain people are more suited for each other and I believe in falling in love, but soul mates, I don’t think they exist.
Phoebe: Okay, good.
Chandler: Why?
Phoebe: Well last night, I met Monica’s.
Chandler: What?
Phoebe: Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God, he is her other half.
Chandler: Come on, don’t be crazy. (To Rachel) You don’t think there’s someone out there better suited for Monica than me, do ya? (Rachel looks at him.)
Rachel: (To Phoebe) Well, what’s he like?!
Phoebe: Well he’s tall.
Rachel: Uh-huh.
Phoebe: He has brown hair.
Rachel: Of course, of course.
Chandler: A tall guy with hair similar to mine, oh unknowable universe!
Phoebe: He works with food!
Rachel: Oh sure. Older?
Phoebe: Obviously, and he’s British.
Rachel: Oh, I was just gonna ask!
Phoebe: Yeah? And, he’s-he’s so centered and mature and confident.
Rachel: Oh, it’s so sad they never had a chance to meet.
Chandler: Luckily, the guy she settled for can’t hear what you’re talking about.
Phoebe: Oh, I’m so sorry. Um, and maybe I’m wrong! I but—y’know I’m gonna go out with him again, I’ll find out more.
Chandler: You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and you’re still gonna date him?
Phoebe: Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girl’s gotta eat.
[Scene: Ross and Rachel's, Ross is opening the door to Monica.]
Monica: Hey.
Ross: Hey.
Monica: I just talked to Joey, I just—I want to see how you were.
Ross: Oh y’know, I still—I can’t believe it. Joey and Rachel I mean it’s… It’s like you and me going out, only weirder!
Monica: All right, I know you’re hurting, and-and I want to be supportive, but don’t say that again.
Ross: Oh my God! What if, what if they get married? Then he’d be the stepfather of my child.
Monica: Honey, I don’t think that’s something we need to worry about! First of all he’s-he’s never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even if he did you have no idea how she’d react.
Ross: Sure, because women never like Joey. Y’know, I think he’s a virgin.
Monica: Joey…he’s not even thinking about going after Rachel!
Ross: He’s not?
Monica: No! All he’s thinking about is how you’re taking this! I mean, listen it’s totally freaking him out. He’s talking about moving to Vermont.
Ross: Why?
Monica: He says he wants to leave the country. (Pause) He thinks you hate him.
Ross: Hate him? I… No, I don’t hate him. (Pause) It’s just it’s Rachel, y’know?
Monica: Honey I can’t even imagine how hard this must be for you. But, I don’t want you to lose Joey over it. And right now he just needs to know that you’re still his friend.
Ross: Okay. Okay, I’ll talk to him.
Monica: All right. Now do it soon, he just asked me how to convert his dollars into Vermont money.
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica and Chandler are on the couch as Phoebe enters with Monica’s soul mate.]
Phoebe: Oh! Hi!
Monica: Hi!
Phoebe: Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
Don: Oh, hello. (Shakes Chandler’s hand.) Hello. (Shakes Monica’s hand.)