剧本《矮子当道》-Get.Shorty
Get Shorty (1995)
by Scott Frank.
Based on the novel by Elmore Leonard.
More info about this movie on imdb.com
BLACK
MAN'S VOICE
Looks fuckin' cold out there.
EXT. VESUVIO'S RESTAURANT -- MIAMI DAY
It is cold. People walk by hugging themselves, pulling up
their collars, etc.
INT. VESUVIO'S RESTAURANT -- SAME TIME
CHILI PALMER, late thirties, sits in a booth with TOMMY
CARLO, a low level mob type. Chili smokes a cigarette,
stares out the window at the people on the street.
TOMMY
Guy on the radio said it's gonna get down to thirty-four.
Chili watches a woman on the sidewalk pause to tighten the
scarf around her neck . . . She looks in the window, sees
Chili looking out.
TOMMY
Thirty-four -- that's freezing, for Christ sake.
(then)
Yo, Chili, you're spacin'.
Chili turns and studies Tommy a moment, then . . .
CHILI
They're closing the Granview. You know, theater down on
Biscayne?
TOMMY
Yeah, the guy owes Momo a few G's.
CHILI
What I'm thinkin' is maybe Momo could buy it.
Tommy looks at him.
CHILI
Momo could buy it, I could run it for him. Show some Cagney
films.
TOMMY
What's Momo gonna want with an old place, shows old movies
people don't care about no more. Outside of maybe turnin' it
into a porno house, I don't think he's gonna give much of a
fuck. And you already got a job.
Chili looks back out the window again.
CHILI
Yeah.
We hear LAUGHTER O. S. and then FOCUS on the window so that
Chili can now see a GROUP OF MEN reflected there, sitting at
a table nearby. We hear MORE LAUGHTER and now Chili turns
and looks over at . . .
RAY "BONES" BARBONI
Mob guy
tall, loud suit with lots of jewelry. As he gets up from the
table, the other men around the table follow his lead as he
finishes up some jokes . . .
MOB GUY
. . . so the guy says, I'm not the tailor, I'm the
undertaker.
The men laugh again, more out of respect than appreciation.
Ray Bones turns, sees . . .
CHILI and Tommy sitting in their booth. Tommy, sucking on a
toothpick, waves.
TOMMY
Ray. How you doing?
RAY BONES
Okay, Tommy. You?
TOMMY
Okay.
Bones focuses on Chili, waits for acknowledgement. But Chili
turns back to the window. Always the peacemaker, Tommy
smiles at Bones again . . .
TOMMY
You believe this weather, Ray? Miami Beach, for Christ's
sake.
RAY BONES
(ignoring him)
Chili Palmer.
(smiles)
Chilly outside. Chili inside. It's a regular fuckin'
chili-fest. Hey, waiter -- give Mr. Chili Pepper a big
fuckin' bowl of chili!
Again the men all laugh respectfully at Ray Bone's stupid
joke. Chili smiles the best he can at the idiot . . .
CHILI
Good to see you, Ray.
He turns back to the window, watches Ray Bones in the
reflection, still cracking up as he and his men head for the
front of the restaurant. Tommy looks at Chili for a moment,
then stands up . . .
TOMMY
You done starin' out the window, I'll see you back at the
office.
Chili nods, but still doesn't turn from the window. He
merely watches in the glass as Tommy turns up his collar and
steps out into the cold Miami day.
TOMMY
Jesus. It's freezin'!
Chili then puts out the cigarette, nods to the waiter who
comes over with the check.
INT. RESTAURANT COATROOM -- A FEW MINUTES LATER
From inside the tiny room. A couple of ratty rain coats and
an old flight jacket hang to one side in immediate f.g. as
Chili steps into the doorway and freezes. He looks o.s. and
whistles . . .
CHILI
Hey.
A moment later the MANAGER, an old Italian guy in a black
suit, joins him in the doorway.
CHILI
What happened to my coat?
The Manager peers into the room . . .
MANAGER
It's not one of these?
CHILI
You see a black leather jacket, fingertip length, like the
one Pacino wore in Serpico? You don't, you owe me three
seventy-nine.
MANAGER
Maybe you don't see my sign?
The manager points to a sign on the wall
'WE CANNOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR LOST ARTICLES.'
CHILI
Look, I didn't come down to sunny Florida to freeze my ass.
You follow me? You get the coat back or you give me the
three seventy-nine my ex-wife paid for it at Alexander's.
The Manager looks o.s., and begins speaking in Italian.
Chili reacts as we hear the name RAY BARBONI mentioned a
couple of times.
MANAGER
Explain to him how Mr. Barboni borrow the coat.
A WAITER joins Chili and the Manager in the doorway.
CHILI
Ray Bones took my coat? Just now?
WAITER
He didn't take it. He borrow it. See, someone took his coat,
you know . . .
(indicates flight jacket)
. . . leave this old one. So Mr. Barboni, he put on this
other coat that fit him pretty good.
CHILI
You mean my coat.
WAITER
He was wearing it, you know, to go home. He wasn't gonna
keep it.
CHILI
My car keys were in that coat.
MANAGER
We call you a taxi.
CHILI
Lemme get this straight. You aren't responsible for any lost
articles like an expensive coat of mine, but you're gonna
find Ray Bones' coat or get him a new one? Is that what
you're telling me?
MANAGER
Mr. Barboni a good customer.
(making sure to add)
Works for Jimmy Capp.
CHILI
I know who he works for. Where's your phone.
INT. TOMMY CARLO'S CAR -- DAY
Tommy drives. Chili stares straight ahead, rubs his hands
together, tries to stay warm . . .
TOMMY
You sure it was Ray Bones took the coat?
CHILI
That's what the guy said.
TOMMY
(nervous now)
Tomorrow, I see on the TV weather, it's gonna be nice and
warm. You won't need the coat.
Chili points out the window.
CHILI
This is it.
EXT. VICTOR HOTEL -- DAY
As Tommy pulls up out front.
INT. CAR -- SAME TIME
Tommy looks up at the hotel as Chili takes a pair of leather
gloves from top of the dash, opens the door. Tommy looks
over at him.
TOMMY
Hey, Chili.
(Chili pauses)
Get your coat, but don't piss the guy off, okay? It could
get complicated and we'd have to call Momo to straighten it
out. Then Momo gets pissed for wasting his time and we don't
need that.
CHILI
Don't worry about it. I won't say any more than I have to,
if that.
EXT. STAIRS -- DAY
Chili pulls on the gloves as he goes up the stairs to the
third floor.
EXT. DOOR -- DAY
As Chili knocks on the door three times. He waits, pulls the
right-hand glove on tight, so that when RAY BONES opens the
door, Chili nails him. One punch. No need to throw the left.
RAY BONES
Jesus . . . Oh, God . . .
Chili then steps over him into the room and grabs his coat
from a chair. He looks over at Ray Bones bent over, blood
running from his nose and mouth, blood all over his hands,
his shirt.
RAY BONES
Fuck, man . . .
Chili walks out. Doesn't say one word to Ray Bones.
EXT. BARBER SHOP -- DAY
A warmer day. The sun is shining. All is quiet.
INT. BARBER SHOP -- SAME TIME
The place is empty except for FRED and ED, the two old
barbers sitting in the chairs, reading newspapers.
ED
You been there, haven't you?
INT. BARBER SHOP BACKROOM -- SAME TIME
A room Tommy and Chili use as an office. Chili sits at the
desk making entries in the collection book. We can hear the
two old barbers talling o.s. . .
FRED O.S.
Paris? Yeah, I been there plenty times. It's right offa
Seventy-nine.
ED (O.S.)
Hell it is. It's on Sixty-eight. Seventeen miles from
Lexington.
FRED O.S.
What're you talking about, Paris, Kentucky, or Paris,
Tennessee?
Silence. No answer to the question. Chili look up from the
collection book, listens a moment to nothing.
He opens the desk drawer and pulls out a .38. He aims the
gun at the open doorway . . .
OVER CHILI'S SHOULDER
As Ray Bones, a bandage on his nose, appears in the back
hall, then the doorway to the office, his face showing
surprise to see a gun aimed at him . . .
Ray Bones begins firing the big Colt auto in his hand, maybe
before he's ready, the gun making an awful racket, when
Chili pulls the trigger, shooting Ray Bones along the top of
his head, creasing him from hairline to crown.
Chili calmly gets to his feet. Aims once more -- probably
lower this time -- but doesn't fire as Ray Bones grabs his
head and stumbles out of there.
RAY BONES (O.S.)
Somebody call 9 fucking 111.
EXT. MIAMI HARBOR -- DAY
Ray Bones, a bandage on his head now as well as his nose,
sits on a cigarette boat with his boss, JIMMY CAP and two
bikini clad BABES, both of whom rub lotion on Jimmy.
JIMMY
Whatta you want me to do Ray? Go to war over a fuckin coat?
You're lucky the guy didn't kill you. The coat was a
Christmas present for Christ's sake.
RAY BONES
You gotta do somethin', Jimmy. This man's got no respect for
us.
JIMMY
He's got no respect for you, and I don't gotta do shit.
Chili Palmer don't work for me, he works for Momo up in
Brooklyn. So as long as Momo's around, nothing happens to
Chili Palmer. You understand?
As an angry Ray Bones sits back, we . . .
FADE TO BLACK
EXT. BROOKLYN STREET -- NIGHT
We TILT DOWN to REVEAL a dark Brooklyn street as a black
Cadillac pulls to a stop in front of an older building.
VOICE
Momo. We're here.
Two big guys, BODYGUARDS, get out of the car. One of them
opens the back door for a huge man, MOMO, who gets out of
the car and looks up at the dark building . . .
MOMO
You check this place out good? If I'm going up alone, I
don't want no surprises.
BODYGUARD
I checked it out, boss.
INT. BROOKLYN TENEMENT BUILDING -- NIGHT
Momo eyes the bodyguards -- both nervous -- then starts up
the steps. We follow Momo as he enters the building, goes up
the dark stairwell . . . up one flight . . . we're behind
him the whole time . . .
When he gets to the top floor, Momo pauses to catch his
breath, before moving on down the hall to a door. Momo
knocks.
VOICE
Yeah?
MOMO
It's Momo.
VOICE
Come in.
Momo slowly opens the door . . . when, suddenly, the
apartment is FLOODED WITH LIGHT so that we see a room full
of PEOPLE, a banner on the back wall reading 'HAPPY
SIXTY-FIFTH, MOMO!'
EVERYONE
Surprise!
Silence as Momo drops to his knees, gurgles something we
can't understand and falls over. Suddenly a dozen faces are
looking down on us as we then . . .
CUT TO
EXT. BARBER SHOP -- DAY
A beautiful day in Miami.
CHILI (V.O.)
So what're you tellin' me, you're never gonna go to sleep
again?
INT. BARBER SHOP -- DAY
Chili and Tommy each sit in a barber chair, reading the
newspaper while Fred and Ed sit nearby playing checkers.
TOMMY
No, I said I'm never goin' to bed. There's a difference.
See, the article says most people die in their beds. I
figure long as I stay outta bed, I'm safe.
CHILI
That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Where do you sleep?
TOMMY
In an armchair. Or I go to a coffee shop, sleep there. Sit
in a booth, pull my hat down.
A car pulls up. Chili's no longer listening to Tommy, but
now watching as Ray Bones and a BLACK GUY get out of the
car.
TOMMY
How many people you hear ever die in a coffee shop?
Tommy looks over as Ray Bones -- smaller bandage on the top
of his head -- and his man enter the shop.
RAY BONES
You cut straight hair in this place, or just fags?
CHILI
Hey, Bones, looks like you're gonna have a nice scar up
there. Maybe these guys can fit you with a rug, cover it up
for ya.
Ray Bones eyes Chili, then nods to Fred and Ed.
RAY BONES
Why don't you geezers take your game over to the park.
The two guys leave as the Black Guy steps up to Chili . . .
BLACK GUY
This man is the man, you understand what I'm saying? He's
Mr. Bones, you speak to him from now on.
Chili exchanges a look with Tommy, watches as 'Mr. Bones'
goes down the hall into the back office, then turns to the
black guy . . .
CHILI
You can do better'n him.
BLACK GUY
Not these days. Not less you can talk Spanish.
Ray Bones comes out with the collection book open, looking
at all of the names of who owes what.
RAY BONES
You got a miss. Leo Devoe. Guy's six weeks over.
CHILI
He died.
RAY BONES
How'd you know he died, he tell you?
Ray Bones checks his man to get some appreciation, but the
guy's too busy looking at the hair rinses and shit on the
connter.
CHILI
Yeah, he told me.
RAY BONES
Personally?
CHILI
Yeah, Ray, he personally told me he got killed in that Get
Away Airlines' jet went down last month.
RAY BONES
What Get Away jet?
CHILI
It was in the Herald.
RAY BONES
Yeah, well, maybe the guy took out flight insurance. Check
with the wife.
CHILI
Hey, it's your book now. You want to check it out, go ahead.
He's got a dry cleaning business out on Federal Highway.
Tommy gives Chili a look as the Black Guy comes over to
Chili, stands next to him. Ray Bones steps over to Chili . .
.
RAY BONES
Momo's dead. Which means anything was his now belongs to
Jimmy Capp, including you.
Tommy watches as the Black Guy picks up a pair of scissors,
runs his hand along the edge . . .
RAY BONES
Which also means when I speak, I'm speakin' for Jimmy. So
e.g. as of now, you start affording me the proper respect.
CHILI
'e.g.' means 'for example', Ray. I think what you wanna say
is 'i.e.'
RAY BONES
Bullshit. E.g. is short for 'ergo'.
CHILI
Ask your man here.
Ray Bones looks at the Black Guy.
BLACK GUY
Best a my knowledge, e.g. means 'for example.'
RAY BONES
E.g., i.e., fuck you. The point is, I say jump, you say
okay. Okay?
TOMMY
(for Chili)
Yeah, Ray. Okay.
Ray Bones then nods to his man who grabs Chili, holds the
point of the scissors to Chili's throat . . .
RAY BONES
You owe me the dry cleaner's fifteen grand plus the juice
which is what another, uhh . . .
CHILI
Twenty seven hundred.
RAY BONES
Exactly. You either get it from the wife or out of your own
pocket, I don't give a fuck. You don't ever hand me a book
with a miss in it.
Ray throws the book at Chili and walks out, his man right
behind him. Chili looks over at Tommy.
TOMMY
I told you not to --
CHILI
Don't say a fuckin' word.
EXT. FAY DEVOE'S BACKYARD -- DUSK
Where Chili sits with FAY DEVOE -- thirties, attractive, in
a sundress -- on her patio. They each have a drink . . .
FAY
I hate the dry cleaning business. I hate being inside all
day, around all those machines.
CHILI
Must be hot.
FAY
You have no idea how hot it is.
She looks at him. Touches her drink to the side of her face.
Chili finishes his drink, sets it down.
CHILI
I was wondering, Fay, if Leo had any life insurance.
FAY
I don't know of any.
They sit there in silence a moment. Fay reaches over, puts a
hand on his leg . . .
FAY
I trust you, Chili. I think you're a decent type of man,
even if you are a crook.
CHILI
Thank you Fay.
She finally looks at Chili . . .
FAY
I wish he really was dead, the son of a bitch.
EXT. LAS VEGAS -- NIGHT
The strip. Mesas Casino.
CUT TO
CLOSE UP OF PHOTOGRAPH
Leo Devoe. Standing with Fay at Epcot Center.
DICK (V.O.)
That's him all right.
PULL BACK TO REVEAL INT. DICK ALLEN'S OFFICE -- NIGHT
A sign on the door reads "DICK ALLEN, CUSTOMER RELATIONS." A
bank of video monitors show the floor of the casino. Chili
sits across the desk from DICK ALLEN -- lots of jewelry, a
giant NEON COWGIRL out the window behind him.
DICK
Called himself Larry DeMille. Hit on every showgirl in town.
Would tell 'em he was the 'Martinizing King of Miami'. What
a moron.
He returns the snapshot to Chili.
DICK
Anyway, you want this guy, he's in L.A. We put him on a
flight after he spanked one a my cocktail girls in the Keno
room.
CHILI
Leo spanked a waitress?
DICK
Apparently, way it went, he invited her to come to Santa
Anita to play the ponies with him. She told him what to do
with that and he gave her one on the tush. My guess, he's by
his lonesome at the track right now.
Chili nods.
DICK
Hey, Chil? Since you're goin' out to L.A. anyway.
CHILI
What've you got?
DICK
Guy owes us a hundred and fifty grand, sixty days over; a
movie producer.
CHILI
Movie producer? Yeah, why not.
As Dick Allen reaches for a pad of paper, we hear THE SOUND
OF AN AIRPLANE OVER. . . .
EXT. LAX RENTAL CAR LOT -- NIGHT
It's raining as we TILT DOWN from a LANDING AIRPLANE to a
National Car Rental BUS arriving next to a tan MINIVAN.
Chili eyes the car a moment, then turns to the driver.
CHILI
What is this?
ATTENDANT
An Oldsmobile Silhouette.
CHILI
I reserved a Cadillac.
ATTENDANT
Yeah, well, this one's the Cadillac of minivans.
CHILI
You're kidding me, right?
ATTENDANT
Hey, you want La Tierra Rent-A-Car just over there, but I
think all they got are Rabbit convertibles.
Chili gives the driver a look then gets out of the bus,
standing there in the rain, his seat getting wet, nowhere to
go. He turns and stares at the minivan . . .
EXT. KAREN FLORES' HOUSE -- NIGHT
All the lights are out, save the BLUE GLOW of a television
coming from one of the downstairs rooms . . .
WOMAN'S VOICE
(loud whisper)
Harry?
INT. KAREN FLORES' BEDROOM -- NIGHT
As KAREN FLORES, pretty, endowed, sits up in bed wearing a
Lakers T-shirt, nothing else. She looks at the big shape
lying under the covers beside her.
KAREN
Harry.
The shape deesn't move. She shakes it.
KAREN
Harry, God damn it, somebody's downstairs.
The shape stirs, rolls over, and we see HARRY ZIMM, balding,
overweight; a movie producer. He sits up.
HARRY
What's wrong?
KAREN
Be quiet and listen.
HARRY
I don't hear anything.
We hear VOICES downstairs.
KAREN
Shhh -- there.
And now LAUGHTER . . .
HARRY
Sounds like the television.
She looks at him . . .
KAREN
When I came upstairs, you stayed to finish your drink. I
told you to turn off the TV when you were through.
(an afterthought)
Come to think of it, I also told you you could sleep in the
maid's room.
HARRY
Yeah, well I turned off the set. I used the remote control
thing and laid it on the floor. You know what could've
happened? The dog came in and stepped on it, turned the TV
back on.
KAREN
I don't have a dog.
HARRY
You don't? What happened to Muff?
KAREN
Harry, are you going down, or you want me to?
He grunts, gets out of bed. Starts looking around the room
for his clothes. Harry looks out the window . . .
HARRY
Anyone skim the pool? It needs it.
KAREN
Harry --
HARRY
I'm going.
INT. HALLWAY -- SAME TIME
The MONOTONE VOICES become louder and more distinct as Harry
moves down the curved staircase in his shirt and boxer
shorts. One of the voices is familiar . . .
We can see this is a nice place as Harry crosses the entry
hall to a doorway, the FLICKERING LIGHT of the television
emitting from inside the room.
Harry listens at the door. Yeah, it's David Letterman.
INT. KAREN'S STUDY -- SAME TIME
Harry moves into the glow of the big Sony, the rest of the
room dark. On the tube, Dave is interviewing actor Martin
Weir when suddenly the screen goes black and the desk lamp
comes on. Harry jumps . . .
HARRY
Jesus Christ!
Chili leans into the light, keeps his tone quiet,
controlled.
CHILI
Harry Zimm, how you doing? I'm Chili Palmer.
Harry presses a hand against his chest.
HARRY
Jesus, if I have a heart attack, I hope you know what to do.
CHILI
Where you been, Harry?
Harry lets his hand slide down over his belly, taking his
time, wanting to show that he has it together now.
HARRY
Have we met? I don't recall.
CHILI
We just did. I told you my name's Chili Palmer.
Harry stares back, trying to figure out who this guy is.
HARRY
You're in pictures, right?
Chili smiles. Doesn't say anything.
HARRY
Did you stop to think what if I had a heart attack?
CHILI
You look okay to me, Harry. Come over here and sit down.
Tell me what you been up to.
Harry takes one of the canvas director's chairs by the desk.
He looks at a bottle of Dewars sitting there, runs a hand
through his hair, thinks about a drink . . .
CHILI
Harry, look at me.
Harry brings his hand down.
HARRY
I'm looking at you.
CHILI
I want you to keep looking right here, okay?
HARRY
That's what I'm doing.
CHILI
You know Dick Allen, Mesa's Casino?
HARRY
Dick Allen's a very dear friend of mine. How far you want to
go with this?
CHILI
We're there, Harry. You signed markers for a hundred and a
half, you're over sixty days past due and you haven't told
anybody what the problem is.
Harry looks at Chili.
HARRY
Jesus Christ, what're you, a collector for a fucking casino?
You come in here, walk in the house in the middle of the
fucking night? I thought you were an actor, auditioning, for
Christ's sake.
Chili nods, almost smiles . . .
CHILI
Is that right? That's interesting. You thought I was acting,
huh?
Harry pushes out of the chair, looks down at Chili.
HARRY
We'll see about this . . .
Harry grabs the phone, punches the 'O'.
HARRY
Operator, how do I get Las Vegas Information?
CHILI
Harry, lemme give you some advice.
Chili leans forward, hangs up the phone with his index
finger, casually reaches for the rereiver . . .
CHILI
You don't want to act like a hard-on, you're standing there
in your undies. You know what I'm saying? What you want to
do is sit down and talk to me.
Harry sits down. Chili hangs up the phone.
CHILI
A marker's like a check, Harry.
HARRY
I know what a marker is.
CHILI
They don't want to deposit yours and have it bounce. That
annoys them. So your dear friend Dick Allen's been calling,
leaving messages on your machine, but you never get back to
him. I happen to be in Vegas on another matter, and Dick
asks me as a favor would I look you up. I follow you over
here, see you in the window with this woman, looks a lot
like that actress Karen Flores, was in Grotesque, except
she's not blond anymore . . .
Harry's gaze moves to the bottle of scotch on the desk . . .
CHILI
You're not looking at me, Harry.
HARRY
Why do I have to keep looking at you?
CHILI
I want you to.
HARRY
You gonna get rough now, threaten me? I make good by
tomorrow or get my legs broken?
CHILI
Come on, Harry -- Mesas? The worst they might do is get a
judgment against you, uttering a bad check. I can't imagine
you want that to happen, man in your position.
HARRY
Fuckin' basketball game.
Harry reaches for the bottle of scotch and pours himself
drink.
HARRY
Tell Dick Allen I'll cover the markers in the next sixty
days at the most. He doesn't like it, that's his problem.
The prick.
Harry starts to take another drink, looks at Chili, not
moving.
HARRY
So, you want me to call you a cab?
Chili shakes his head, keeps staring at Harry, but with a
different expression now, more thoughtful, curious.
CHILI
You make movies, huh?
HARRY
I produce feature motion pictures, no TV. You mentioned
Grotesque, that happened to be Grotesque Part II that Karen
Flores was in. She starred in all three of my Slime
Creatures releases you might have seen.
Chili nods, leans forward on the desk.
CHILI
I think I got an idea for a movie.
INT. KAREN FLORES' BEDROOM -- NIGHT
Karen is sitting up in bed, listening. We hear the muffled
sonuds of Chili and Harry talking downstairs. She gets out
of bed . . .
INT. HALLWAY -- SAME TIME
Chili and Harry's conversation gets louder as Karen descends
the stairs. She peers into the study, but they're not in
there . . .
INT. KITCHEN -- SAME TIME
Chili sits with Harry at a butcher block table, a bottle of
Dewars and a couple of glasses now between them.
CHILI
Yeah, Leo wore these little plaid hats -- Miami, middle of
the summer, this guy thinks no one's gonna notice he's
balding, he wears a fuckin' hat.
Harry looks up past Chili, smiles.
HARRY
Karen?
Chili turns aronud and sees her standing in the doorway now,
her arms folded across that chest, the Lakers T-shirt coming
down just past her crotch.
HARRY
Karen, say hello to Chili Palmer. Chili, this is Karen
Flores.
CHILI
Karen, it's a pleasure. How you doing?
KAREN
How did you get in the house?
HARRY
He's telling me an idea for a movie. It's not bad so far.
(motions with his glass)
Sit down, have a drink.
(to Chili)
Tell Karen, let's see what she thinks.
KAREN
Maybe you didn't hear me.
CHILI
The door from the patio, in back.
KAREN
You broke in?
CHILI
No, it was open. It wasn't locked.
KAREN
What if it was?
Chili doesn't say anything, just watches her, likes the way
she's handling it.
HARRY
You want to hear this idea? It's about a dry cleaner who
scams an airline out of three hundred grand. Go on, tell
her.
CHILI
You just did.
HARRY
I mean, the way you told it to me. Start at the beginning,
we see how the story line develops.
Chili looks at Karen. She leans in the doorway.
CHILI
Well, basically, this guy owes a shylock fifteen thousand,
plus he's a few weeks behind on the vig, the interest you
have to pay.
KAREN
I know what a vig is.
HARRY
It's the kind of situation, you don't pay, you get your legs
broken.
CHILI
Or the guy thinks he could get 'em broken. You have to
understand the loan shark's in business the same as anybody
else. He isn't in it to hurt people. He's in it to make
money.
EXT. LEO DEVOE'S HOUSE -- DAY
As we see Chili talking to Fay on the front porch.
CHILI (V.O.)
But the dry cleaner, we'll call him Leo, he's scared,
doesn't know any better, so he takes off --
INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN -- NIGHT
As Harry jumps in . . .
HARRY
That's Miami. He's going to Vegas. He's got a few bucks and
he's thinking it's his only chance.
INT. AIRPLANE -- DAY
We see a fidgety LEO DEVOE, a little guy in a crummy suit
and a little green hat sitting there in coach, looking
around.
CHILI (V.O.)
Leo gets on a plane, ready to go, but the plane sits there
at the gate, doesn't move.
Behind Leo sits a BRAT with his MOM and DAD. The parents are
trying to entertain the kid with the G.I. Joes, other stuff
they've brought along, but the kid spots Leo's hat as Leo
looks up to listen to an announcement . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
They annonnce over the PA there's some kind of mechanical
problem, they'll be there maybe an hour, but keep your seats
in case they get it fixed sooner.
Leo gets really uncomfortable now . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
The guy's nervous, in no shape to just sit there, sweat it
out. So he gets off the plane . . .
As Leo gets up from his seat, the kid knocks off Leo's
little green hat, and we . . .
CUT TO
INT. MIAMI AIRPORT COCKTAIL LOUNGE -- DAY
As Leo downs a drink, looks around for the waitress . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
Goes in the cocktail lounge and starts throwing 'em down,
one after the other.
He 's motioning to her for another, when we see a PLANE taxi
past the window in the b.g . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
When the plane pulls away from the gate.
INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN -- NIGHT
As Harry interrupts.
HARRY
Without him. The guy's so out of it he doesn't even know
it's gone.
CHILI
That's right. As a matter of fact . . .
INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE -- DAY
A shit-faced Leo struggles to keep his head up as he watches
the waitress look out the window and gasp . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
He's still in the lounge when a plane blows up on the runway
. . .
We see a BIG FIREBALL in the b.g. as Leo's head hits the
table.
INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN -- NIGHT
As Chili lights a cigarette.
CHILI
So when the guy finds out it was his flight, he can't
believe it. If he'd stayed on that plane, he'd be dead.
Right then he knows his luck has changed. If everybody
thinks he's dead he won't have to pay back the fifteen or
what he owes on the vig, four and a half a week.
Chili offers the pack to Karen. Karen doesn't move.
KAREN
The interest is four hundred and fifty dollars a week on
fifteen thousand?
CHILI
That's right. Three percent.
KAREN
But a week. That's a hundred and fifty percent a year.
CHILI
A hundred and fifty-six. Some'll charge you more'n that, go
as high as six for five on a short-term loan. So three a
week's not too bad.
KAREN
A real bargain.
She shakes her head, keeps her arms folded. Chili watches
her, likes the way she's giving it to him.
HARRY
Keep going.
CHILI
Well, since Leo's name was on the passenger list . . .
INT. AIRPORT HANGER -- DAY
As an FFA OFFICIAL leads Fay, a black veil over her face,
amongst tables full of charred items . . .
CHILI (V.O.)
They bring his wife out to the airport where they're going
through personal effects, whatever wasn't burned up. Leo's
bags were on the plane, so the wife tells 'em what to look
for, things only she would know about.
FAY REACTS as the FFA guy points to a LITTLE GREEN HAT on
one of the tables. She grabs it, clutches it to her chest,
pretends to faint.
INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN -- NIGHT
As Karen finds herself listening, despite herself.
CHILI
A couple days ago by, people from the airliner come to see
his wife, tell her how sorry they are and all that their
plane exploded and offer her a settlement, the amount based
on what he would've earned operating the dry cleaner's the
rest of his life. Leo had some kind of trouble with his
kidneys, so they were giving him about ten years.
KAREN
How much is the wife offered?
Chili starts to speak, but Harry cuts him off.
HARRY
Three hundred grand, and they take it, money in hand, babe.
The guy has his wife cash the check and he takes off for Las
Vegas with the dough. Gets there, he's supposed to call her,
tell her when to come out. But she never hears from him
again.
Meanwhile, the guy's hot, runs the three hundred up to half
a million . . .
CHILI
He comes to L.A. . . .
Harry raises his hand to stop Chili. He's rolling, turns to
Karen now . . .
HARRY
It drives the guy nuts, he's winning but can't tell anybody
who he is. You show in a back story his motivation, his
desire to be famous, you know, pal around with celebrities,
the headliners doing the big rooms. Now he's got the dough
to buy his way in, mix with celebs and he can't resist . . .
Harry then turns back to Chili.
HARRY
So he comes to L.A. . . .
CHILI
I don't know about his wanting to meet celebrities, that's
something new. But, yeah, he comes to L.A. Then after that,
I don't know what happens.
Chili looks at Karen. Patient. Not moving.
HARRY
That's it? That's your movie?
CHILI
I said I had an idea, that's all.
HARRY
That's half a movie, with holes in it. Maybe forty minutes
of screen time. You don't even have a girl, a female lead,
and on top of that, there's no one to sympathize with, you
don't have a good guy.
CHILI
The shylock's the good guy.
HARRY
The shylock? He's barely mentioned. And it's not believable
the wife would get a settlement that fast.
KAREN
Harry doesn't realize it's a true story.
They both look at her now.
KAREN
That Miami flight that went down, it was on the news every
day for about a week. Harry must've been busy.
HARRY
That's where you got the idea?
CHILI
Part of it, yeah.
HARRY
Wait a minute, you're not the guy, are you? The dry cleaner?
CHILI
You mean, Leo?
HARRY
You wouldn't be talking to me if you were.
CHILI
I'm not the guy, Harry.
HARRY
But you work for the casino?
CHILI
I'm out here looking for Leo. I just looked you up as a
favor to your dear friend, Dick Allen.
HARRY
So you don't work for the casino?
KAREN
Harry, for God's sake . . .
They both look at her.
KAREN
He's the shylock.
She's staring at Chili again. Harry turns to him.
HARRY
Is that right, that's what you do for a living?
CHILI
What I did till recently.
(looking at Karen)
After I get done here I'll think about what I'm gonna do
next.
KAREN
With your experience, you could always become an agent.
Right, Harry?
HARRY
Yeah, that's what we need. More agents.
KAREN
Well. I got an audition tomorrow.
HARRY
No problem. You go on off to bed.
Karen looks at the two of them sitting there. Not about to
move.
KAREN
What I'm saying, Harry, is I want you and your new buddy to
get out of my house.
HARRY
Oh, yeah, sure.
CHILI
Nice meeting you, Karen.
She just looks at him, turns and walks out. Chili watches
her go. Harry watches Chili, pours the last of the scotch
into Chili's glass . . .
HARRY
I imagine in your line of work, there were times you had to
get rough, you know, say one of your customers stopped
paying.
CHILI
They always paid.
Harry nods, thinks a moment, then . . .
HARRY
You pack a gun?
CHILI
Not really.
HARRY
What does that mean?
CHILI
Maybe a few times I have.
HARRY
Ever shot anybody.
CHILI
Once.
HARRY
Really? You ever been arrested?
CHILI
I've been picked up a couple times. Loan sharking.
Racketeering. But I was never convicted. I'm clean.
HARRY
Racketeering, that covers a lot of ground, doesn't it?
Chili looks at him.
CHILI
Why don't you get to the point, Harry? You want me to do
something for you.
EXT. FAY DEVOE'S HOUSE -- MORNING
As a Cadillac Eldorado pulls up out front and Ray Bones and
his man get out, check out the neighborhood . . .
RAY BONES
Hi, I'm Ray, a friend of Chili Palmer's.
INT. FAY DEVOE'S HOUSE -- MORNING
Fay watches as Ray Bones and his man go through her things.
RAY BONES
Have your spoken to Mr. Palmer since your husband . . . you
know, blew up?
FAY
Maybe once or twice.
RAY BONES
(coming over)
What was it you talked about?
FAY
Oh, nothing really? This and that.
Ray Bones hits Fay Devoe in the face. She drops to her knees
and cries out. Ray Bones crouches down in front of her, puts
a hand in her hair.
RAY BONES
Fay . . .
(pulls her head up)
Fay.
She looks at him. Afraid now, her nose is bleeding. Ray
Bones smiles at her, strokes her hair.
RAY BONES
Fay, I want us to be friends. And friends don't hit each
other, 'less they have to.
(she nods)
So whatta you say we start all over and you tell me exactly
what the fuck is goin' on?
EXT. SUNSET BOULEVARD -- MORNING
As we BOOM DOWN from a massive billboard for the movie
Bonaparte starring Martin Weir as Napoleon and begin
tracking with Harry's eight-year-old, battered Mercedes . .
.
INT. HARRY'S CAR -- SAME TIME
Harry drives, all the while gesturing with a lit cigarette.
HARRY
These guys, my investors, they run a limo service, came to
me originally, put money in a few of my pictures and did
okay, they're happy. So they come in on another deal -- this
was back a few months ago when I was planning what would be
my next picture, about this band of killer circus freaks
that travel around the country leaving bodies in their wake.
The characters, there's this seven-hundred-pound fat lady
who has a way of seducing guys, gets them in her trailer --
CHILI
Harry, look at me.
Harry looks at him. Chili takes away his cigarette.
CHILI
You're trying to tell me how you fucked up without sounding
stupid, and that's hard to do. Let's just get to where
you're at, okay? You blew the two hundred grand the limo
guys gave you in Vegas on a basketball game and you haven't
told 'em about it. Why not?
HARRY
Because they're not the type of guys would take it with any
degree of understanding or restraint. The first thing they'd
do is break my legs.
CHILI
You got that on the brain, Harry. If you're so scared of 'em
why'd you take their money to Vegas to begin with?
HARRY
Because I need half a million to buy a script.
CHILI
For a movie?
HARRY
A blockbuster. But quality. No mutants or maniacs. This
one's gonna be my Driving Miss Daisy.
CHILI
What's it called?
HARRY
Mr. Lovejoy.
CHILI
Mr. Lovejoy? That's the title?
HARRY
It's not bad when you know what it's about.
Harry pulls to the curb, faces Chili . . .
HARRY
Murray Saffrin, guy who wrote it, did all my Grotesque
pictures, had it in a drawer for twenty years. He shows it
to me one day, tells me he's got a star interested, would I
produce it.
CHILI
Who's the star?
Harry points arross the street to the Cafe Med where we see
a RED FERRARI convertible parked out the front. We see
MARTIN WEIR and a WOMAN with jet-black hair sitting at a
table . . .
HARRY
Two time academy award nominee, Martin Weir.
CHILI
Martin Weir. He played the mob guy that turned snitch in The
Cyclone.
HARRY
One of his best parts.
CHILI
No, his best part was the cripple gay guy that climbed Mt.
Whitney.
HARRY
Ride the Clouds. Good picture.
They watch Martin and the girl a moment . . .
CHILI
She looks familiar.
HARRY
She's a rock star. Every day, same time, they come down here
and have breakfast. He has the egg white omelette; she has
the banana pancakes. He sits facing west so he can see his
billboard. She faces east so she has an excuse to wear the
shades.
Harry pulls out, starts driving again . . .
HARRY
Anyway, Murray has this shrink, who also happens to be
Martin's personal trainer's shrink. Murray gives the shrink
the script and the shrink gives it to Martin's trainer who
reads it to Martin while they work out, and Martin flips.
Loves it.
CHILI
So what's the problem?
HARRY
The problem is Murray. He and a few other blocked
screenwriters went river rafting down the Kern a few weeks
ago. Murray never made it back.
CHILI
He drown?
HARRY
Heart attack. Apparently they brought a couple hookers
along.
Chili nods, looks up at an ANGELYNE billboard . . .
HARRY
Doris, Murray's widow, finds out about this Martin Weir
thing and says since Murray and I never had any written
contract, she wants five hundred grand for the script.
CHILI
So you're thinking what if I was to put you next to my dry
cleaner. Ask him if he wants to invest his money in a movie.
HARRY
That, or I'm thinking what if some tragic accident were to
befall the widow Saffrin --
CHILI
I'm not gonna pop her, Harry.
HARRY
Just a thought.
CHILI
But I could talk to the limo guys. Tell 'em to leave you
alone for a while. Make the point in a way they'd understand
it.
HARRY
You don't even know these guys.
CHILI
Harry, I probably know 'em better than you do.
HARRY
What do you get out of this?
CHILI
Let's see how we get along.
EXT. PARKING LOT -- DAY
BO CATLETT, black, tall, put together in a tan outfit
suit, shirt, tie, lies on the hood of a BLACK STRETCH LIMO,
his back against the windshield, reading Daily Variety, a
headline proclaiming 'BONAPARTE STANDS TALL AT THE B. O.' We
hear the sonud of an AIRPLANE and he checks his watch.
He casually folds the newspaper as a 747 screams past
directly overhead and we . . .
PULL BACK TO REVEAL
LAX -- DAY
As Bo Catlett pounds twice on the fender . . .
BO CATLETT
That's us.
INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL -- DAY
Bo Catlett walks through the terminal. We hear the arrival
of the Miami flight annonnced over the PA as Catlett stops
at one of the gates.
We see a plane pulling into the gate through the glass as Bo
Catlett checks out the other people waiting to greet the
flight . . .
Like, for example, the YOUNG DUDE in jeans and a wool shirt
hanging out.
Bo Catlett studies him a moment, then sits down in one of
the chairs. He looks over at . . .
A BIG MAN, bearded, wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt, and
carrying a three-year-old GIRL in his arms. The girl licks
an ice-cream, spilling some on Daddy's shirt . . .
Bo Catlett looks over as disembarking PASSENGERS start
coming through the gate.
As a LATINO MAN gets off the plane and glances around. He
looks uncomfortable in the loose-fitting suit, like a
migrant dressed for Saturday night.
The Latino Man lays his TICKET ENVELOPE on top of the trash
container near the gateway . . .
INSERT -- TICKET ENVELOPE
The name Y. PORTILLO printed on the outside. The big man
with the little girl picks up the ticket and walks away.
As the LATINO MAN heads straight for Bo Catlett.
BO CATLETT
Don't say nothing to me. Sit down and act like you're
waiting for somebody supposed to meet you.
LATINO MAN
The fock you taking about . . .
Hitting the word hard, like Tony Montana in Scarface.
LATINO MAN
They nobody know me here, man. Give me the focking money.
BO CATLETT
Sit down. Now be looking. Man over to your right in the blue
wool shirt hanging out . . . the other way, derecho . . .
Bo Catlett hunches over to rest his arms on his thighs, so
that the Latino Man is now between him and the dude in the
wool shirt.
BO CATLETT
That's a federal officer, most likely DEA. He moves his leg
look for the bulge. You savvy bulge? That's his backup piece
. . . Hey. Try it without looking right at him if you can.
The Latino Man, trying to be cool about it, checks out the
dude in the wool shirt. Sure enough, there's a bulge down
near the guy's ankle.
BO CATLETT
What's your name?
LATINO MAN
(nervous now)
Yayo. Portillo.
BO CATLETT
Alright, Yayo, you know he's there, now forget about him.
Now I'm gonna get up. Soon as I'm gone, you sit down in this
same seat I'm in. You feel something under your ass it's the
key to a locker where your half a million is. Along with
some product we're returning
Nervous now, Yayo is staring at the guy with the wool shirt.
YAYO
You suppose to give me the focking money yourself.
Bo Catlett gets up, adjusts his suit jacket, smoothing the
long roll lapel.
BO CATLETT
Try to be cool Yahoo. I told you where it is. Do it how I
told you and have a safe trip home. Or as you all say, vaya
con Dios, motherfucker.
Bo Catlett walks off, leaving Yayo sitting there, confused
now, not quite sure what to do.
CLOSE ON HAND HOLDING TICKET ENVELOPE
The name Y. PORTILLO written on the jacket.
PULL BACK TO REVEAL
BAGGAGE CLAIM -- DAY
Where the Big Man in the Hawaiian shirt waits by the
carousel. His LITTLE GIRL HOLDS THE TICKET ENVELOPE. The man
grabs a case from the carousel and walks to the door. He
tears the baggage claim stub from the envelope and hands it
to the SECURITY GUARD.
EXT. BAGGAGE CLAIM -- DAY
As the Big Man and the little girl walk to the black stretch
parked at the curb, RONNIE WINGATE, an aging surfer in a
suede jacket and running shoes, holds the door open for
them.
RONNIE
Like fucking clockwork, eh Bear?
BEAR/BIG MAN
Don't cuss in front of Farrah.
The Bear hands the case to Bo Catlett who sits in the back
of the limo . . .
GIRL
Hi, Bo.
BO CATLETT
How you doing, sweetie?
As Ronnie gets in back with Bo Catlett, The Bear puts his
daughter in a toddler seat up front, then gets behind the
wheel.
GIRL
Here we go!
EXT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- DAY
Two stories, part of a block of white store fronts on Sunset
near La Cienega.
INT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- DAY
Light filters through venetian blinds, illuminating a desk
stacked with folders, magazines, scripts, papers, unopened
mail, hotel ashtrays, a brass lamp, a clock and two
telephones.
HARRY
I once asked this literary agent what type of writing
brought the most money and the agent says, 'Ransom notes.'
Chili stands looking over some of the old photographs as
Harry goes through the mess on the desk. There are some of
Karen, Harry with a much youger, blonde Karen. Harry with
giant bugs, Harry shaking hands with mutants and maniacs,
and so on.
HARRY
Here it is . . . Mr. Lovejoy.
Harry hands a script to Chili. Chili examines the cover, the
first time he's ever held a movie script. He opens it to the
middle . . .
CHILI
Lovejoy sits behind the wheel, watching the bar across the
street, getting his video camera ready for action . . .
(looks up)
What's he doing? Following a guy?
HARRY
Read it. It's a grabber.
Chili looks out the window as we see a long black stretch
limo pull up to the curb down on the street . . .
CHILI
Hey, Harry? I think your investors are here.
EXT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- SAME TIME
As the Bear opens the door for Bo Catlett and Ronnie . . .
INT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- SAME TIME
As Harry moves away from the window.
HARRY
Jesus . . .
Chili tosses the script on the desk, moves between a pair of
fat red leather chairs.
CHILI
All right, Harry, make sure the limo guys sit here, not over
on the sofa.
Harry is tugging the string to lower the blinds behind the
desk.
CHILI
No leave 'em up, we want the light in their eyes. I'll be at
the desk . . . but don't introduce me, let it go, just start
talking. You're gonna be here, behind 'em when they sit
down.
HARRY
They'll be looking at you. They don't know who you are.
CHILI
That's right, they're wondering, who's this guy? You don't
tell 'em. Understand, Harry? Do not tell 'em who I am.
Harry glances off as we hear RONNIE SINGING down the hall.
RONNIE (O.S.)
In the year 2525 . . . if man is still alive . . .
HARRY
So what do I say to them?
CHILI
You don't say any more'n you have to. You say, 'Well, I'm
glad you assholes stopped by, so I can set you straight.'
HARRY
You're kidding, right?
RONNIE (O.S.)
If woman can survive . . .
CHILI
You tell 'em the movie's been postponed. Say, till next
year, if you want. But don't tell 'em why or what you're
doing. Understand, Harry? You don't tell 'em anything about
Mr. Lovejoy.
And the door opens. Chili sits behind the desk, watching the
two of them come into the office. Ronnie singing . . .
RONNIE
They may find . . .
He looks about the office . . . at the old photographs . . .
RONNIE
Harry, what year is it, man? We enter a time warp? I feel
like I'm back in Hollywood of yesteryear.
Harry waves them right into the two cracked red leather
chairs facing the desk. Chili watches as Catlett comes
first. Sitting down, he nods to Chili who ignores him.
HARRY
Have a seat . . . right over here . . .
Ronnie sits down in the chair and hooks one leg over the
arm, swings it up and down, his motor running on some
chemical. He too stares at Chili.
HARRY
This is my associate, Chili Palmer, who'll be working with
me.
Harry already forgetting his instructions. Chili can't
believe it. The limo guys nod to Chili and Chili nods back,
trying to catch Harry's eye.
HARRY
I want to make sure there's no misunderstanding here.
Despite rumors you might have heard, your investment in
Freaks is as sound as the day you signed your participation
agreement.
Ronnie has his face raised to the ceiling.
RONNIE
I can hear you, but where the fuck are you, man?
BO CATLETT
(looking at Chili)
What I been wondering is where's he been.
RONNIE
Yeah, where've you been? We haven't heard from you lately.
Harry comes around to stand at one side of the desk, his
back to the window . . .
HARRY
I've been off scouting locations. Interviewing actors in New
York.
Chili's gaze moves from Ronnie the fool to Bo Catlett the
dude, the man composed, elbows on the chair arms, his hands
steepled in front of him.
HARRY
The main thing I want to tell you, the start date for Freaks
is being pushed back a little, a few months.
Ronnie stops bouncing his leg.
RONNIE
A few months?
HARRY
Maybe longer. We need prep time.
RONNIE
Hey, Harry? Bullshit. We have an agreement with you, man.
HARRY
We're gonna make the picture. I've just got another project
to do first, that's all. One I promised this guy years ago.
Chili shakes his head, he can't believe he's hearing this.
Ronnie sits up straight.
RONNIE
I want to see your books, Harry. Show me where it is, a two
with five zeroes after it in black and white, man. I want to
see your books and your bank statements.
CHILI
Hey, Ronnie? Look at me.
Boom. Ronnie looks over. So does Bo Catlett for that matter.
CHILI
You have a piece of a movie, that's all. You don't have a
piece of Harry. He told you we're doing another movie first.
And that's the way it's gonna be.
RONNIE
Excuse me. But who the fuck are you?
CHILI
I'm the one telling you how it is. That's not too hard to
figure out, is it?
Ronnie turns to Bo Catlett, the man not having moved or
changed his expression the last few minutes.
RONNIE
Cat?
Bo Catlett takes his time, gives it some thought. He looks
at Harry . . .
BO CATLETT
What's this movie you're doing first?
CHILI
Harry, let me answer that.
Catlett looks at Chili again.
CHILI
But first I want to know who I'm talking to. Am I talking to
you, or am I talking to him?
BO CATLETT
(beat, smiles)
You can talk to me.
CHILI
That's what I thought. So let me put it this way
Now it's between them. The guy studies Chili, thinks about
whether or not to make a move, when Harry steps in, reaches
over the desk and picks up a script . . .
HARRY
This is the project, Mr. Lovejoy. I'm not trying to pull
anything on you guys. This is it, right here.
Chili looks at Harry, wonders if there's a way to shut him
up without punching him in the mouth.
RONNIE
Mr. Loveboy? What is it, Harry, a porno flick?
He reaches for the script. Harry backs away, holds the
script to his chest. Bo Catlett notices this.
HARRY
It's nothing. It's fluff. Nothing you'd be interested in.
Bo Catlett eyes him a beat, then pushes out of his chair . .
.
BO CATLETT
Harry, you think we go to see your movies? I've seen better
film on teeth. Makes no difference to me which one our
money's in. So how 'bout you take our twenty points out of
Freaks and put 'em in this other one, Mr. Loverboy.
HARRY
I can't do it.
BO CATLETT
You positive about that?
HARRY
It's a different kind of deal.
Bo Catlett nods, gets up.
BO CATLETT
Okay. Then be good enough to hand us our money back, or you
think about us coming in on this new one.
RONNIE
By Friday, man, or you're fuckin' dead as disco.
Ronnie opens his coat so that Harry can see a gun tucked in
his belt . . .
RONNIE
You hear me?
Bo Catlett gives Ronnie a look.
BO CATLETT
Take your time, Harry.
(closes Ronnie's jacket)
We're not animals. Are we, Ronnie?
Bo Catlett glances once more at Chili then follows Ronnie
out the door. Harry stares at the door a moment, senses
Chili staring at him . . .
HARRY
What?
CHILI
I don't know, maybe I wasn't clear. But I thought . . . I
told you to keep your mouth shut.
HARRY
I had to tell 'em something.
CHILI
Never say anything unless you have to.
Chili shakes his head as Harry sits down in one of the
chairs, fumbles for his cigarettes.
CHILI
You tell me you want these guys off your back. Next thing I
know, you're saying yeah, maybe they can have a piece of Mr.
Lovejoy. I couldn't believe my fuckin' ears.
HARRY
I said I'd think about it. What does that mean? In this
town, nothing.
CHILI
That's the difference between you and me, Harry. I say what
I mean. I want something from someone, I ask 'em straight
out. I want Martin Weir, I go get Martin Weir. I don't fuck
around with his trainer's shrink.
HARRY
His shrink's trainer.
Chili looks at Harry.
CHILI
Take me back to my car.
EXT. LAX -- DAY
As a plane touches down on the runway . . .
INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL -- SAME TIME
Yayo, now soaked with sweat, is still here. He stands
watching a row of lockers. He stares at one of them . . .
CLOSE ON LOCKER.
The number C-18. We PUSH IN . . .
YAYO
starts to move for it . . . then looks off at . . .
A MAN IN A SUIT
as we quickly TILT DOWN to the guy's ankle, looks like a
bulge there. We then . . .
WHIP PAN TO
A WOMAN, dressed casually in slacks and a blouse. We TILT
DOWN to her ankle, hmmm, is that a bulge? We . . .
WHIP PAN TO
A TENNIS SHOE, tapping to some unheard rhythm and what looks
like a bulge near the ankle. We TILT UP this time to reveal
A LITTLE KID, listening to a walkman.
YAYO
obviously losing it now, rubs his eyes and quickly walks off
to a row of payphones . . .
EXT. KAREN FLORES' HOUSE -- DAY
Chili's minivan is parked outfront.
TOMMY (V.O.)
Where you been? I been callin' all over for you . . .
INT KAREN'S HOUSE -- THE STUDY -- SAME TIME
Chili sits at the desk on the phone.
TOMMY
(PHONE)
Ray Bones is looking for you. He's got some kinda bug up his
ass, can't sit still.
INT. BARBER SHOP -- DAY
Tommy on the phone.
TOMMY
I hate to say I told you, but I did. I told you don't start
nothing with him that time.
INTERCUTTING TOMMY & CHILI
CHILI
You said don't say nothing and I didn't.
TOMMY
No, you just broke his fuckin' nose instead.
CHILI
You gonna start that again? You're just like him, all you
got room for in your brain is one fuckin' thing.
TOMMY
All I know is he came by the barber shop, all fuckin'
undone, wanting to know where you were staying in Vegas. I
told him I don't know. I still don't.
CHILI
How'd he know I was in Vegas? You tell him?
TOMMY
He already knew it.
CHILI
Yeah, well, I'm in L.A. now.
TOMMY
Whatta you doing out there?
CHILI
I'm going into the movie business.
TOMMY
What're you talking about? You wanna be a movie star?
CHILI
I'm thinking about producing.
TOMMY
How you gonna do that? You don't know shit about making
movies.
CHILI
I don't think the producer has to do much, outside of maybe
knowing a writer.
TOMMY
Hey, Chil? I think you're fulla shit.
INT. KAREN'S ENTRY WAY -- SAME TIME
As Karen, dressed as a B-movie queen, press kit under one
arm, steps inside, freezes as she hears . . .
CHILI (O.S.)
. . . call me soon as you know when Ray's coming out.
INT. STUDY -- SAME TIME
Chili is scribbling something on a piece of paper as Karen
comes into the room. Chili looks up at her as he hangs up,
smiles at her.
CHILI
Hey . . . Karen. How ya' doin'?
KAREN
What're you doing here?
CHILI
I wanted to come by, apologize for coming into your house
like I did last night.
KAREN
Lemme get this straight, you broke in again to apologize for
breaking in before?
CHILI
No, no . . . you let the patio door open. You gotta stop
doin' that, all the nice things you got around here.
KAREN
Yeah, well make sure you lock it on the way out.
CHILI
Rough day on the set?
KAREN
I spent all day crawling out of a grave. The costumer kept
bitching 'cause I was ripping my nylons --
CHILI
Ripped nylons work. Makes the shot more real.
KAREN
(regarding him)
. . . That's what we finally decided.
CHILI
Like in Bride of the Mutant, when you played the whole end
with that torn top.
She looks at him.
KAREN
You saw that one?
CHILI
Yeah. When you turn to the camera to tell the alien mother
that her time on earth is finished . . . when you give us
all that look, Joan Crawford wishes on her best day she had
that much presence. Not even in Mildred Pierce -- which by
the way was a better book than a movie -- did Crawford even
touch the intensity you had in that look.
KAREN
(beat)
Yeah . . . that was a good scene. I mean, for a horror
movie.
CHILI
For any movie.
KAREN
I know I'm better than what I've been doing the last ten
years, walking around in a tank top and fuck-me pumps,
waiting till it's time to scream.
CHILI
Man, can you scream.
KAREN
Yeah. It's a real gift.
(beat)
I'm just saying it'd be nice, one time in my career to get
the chance to say one great line. You know, like in that
Bette Davis picture, Cabin in the . . .
CHILI
Cotton.
KAREN
Yeah, you know when Bette comes up to the guy on the porch,
gives him a flirty look and says, 'I'd kiss you, but . . .'
CHILI/KAREN
'I just washed my hair.'
KAREN
Yeah.
CHILI
That is a great line.
Chili looks at her.
CHILI
How come you stopped making movies with Harry?
KAREN
I married Martin. That was a full-time job.
CHILI
You read Harry's new one? He says it's the best thing he's
ever read.
KAREN
He must mean after Slime Creature 3.
CHILI
That why Harry came over last night? See if you could help
him get Martin in his movie?
KAREN
Harry's dreaming of a forty-million-dollar production he'll
never get off the ground with a star he'll never sign. With
or without my help.
CHILI
Harry told me Martin loves it, he flipped.
KAREN
Yeah, well Martin is known for his flipping. He flips over a
script, and when the time comes to make a deal, he flips
out.
CHILI
Tell you what, I'll stop by Harry's office and pick up a
copy for you.
KAREN
Don't go out of your way.
They consider each other a moment . . . until Chili finally
checks his watch.
CHILI
Well, I gotta have a talk with Leo, my runaway dry cleaner.
KAREN
Right. See how your story ends.
CHILI
Yeah. Right.
(then)
Listen, Touch of Evil's phying near my hotel. You wanna go
check it out? Watch Charlton Heston play a Mexican?
Karen looks caught, doesn't answer right away.
CHILI
Maybe some other time.
He turns to go, then turns back to her . . .
CHILI
'He tried to make love to me and I shot him.'
(then)
Another great Bette Davis line.
Karen looks at him. Surprised. He smiles at her.
CHILI
See you around.
EXT. BEVERLY HILLS HOTEL -- NIGHT
Leo Devoe, dressed in a sporty plaid ensemble, complete with
little matching hat gets out of a cab, and walks to the
front entrance. He tips the doorman, gives him a grin.
DOORMAN
Evening, sir.
LEO
And a good evening to you, too, sir.
INT. HOTEL HALLWAY -- NIGHT
As Leo the high-rolling dry cleaner bounces down the hall,
unlocks his door . . .
INT. LEO'S HOTEL ROOM -- NIGHT
Dark. Leo enters, heads for the bottle of Chivas on the
desk. Has one straight out of the bottle, ahhh, before
pulling a fat wad of cash out of his jacket, tossing it on
the desk like it's change from the cab fare.
He then takes off the jacket, unbuttons the shirt, reaches
for the Chivas again, when we hear . . .
CHILI O.S.
Look at me, Leo.
Crash. Something glass hits the floor. Probably the Chivas
bottle as Leo nearly has a fucking coronary . . .
Leo looks over as Chili turns on the light behind him. But
what catches Leo's eye is the BRIEFCASE sitting on the couch
beside Chili.
CHILI
I wouldn't think you're that dumb, leave over three hundred
grand in the closet, underneath the extra blanket, but I
guess you are.
LEO
I didn't know where else to keep it.
(then)
Where would you?
CHILI
You're here a while, what's wrong with a bank?
LEO
They report it to the IRS.
CHILI
You don't open an account, Leo, you put it in a safe deposit
box. Dip in whenever you want.
Leo nods in his sporty hat and undershirt, thinking it over,
what to do the next time he scams an airline.
CHILI
You've been losing.
LEO
I'm up twelve grand today.
CHILI
From when? You left Vegas with four-fifty?
LEO
Who told you that?
CHILI
Now you're down to three-ten in the case. You must've cooled
off quite a bit since you got here.
LEO
How'd you know I was here?
CHILI
Here's another tip
Leo looks away, raises his preshaped plaid hat and recocks
it, then. . .
LEO
It was Fay, wasn't it, told you about the money. She tell
you my whole life history, for Christ's sake?
CHILI
I wouldn't let her if she tried. Why I'm here, Leo,
basically, is to save your ass.
LEO
How? By taking my money?
CHILI
You can keep what you won today. That's yours.
LEO
It's all mine.
CHILI
Sit down, Leo.
Leo sits down in the arm chair, stares sadly at the
briefcase.
CHILI
I don't know how you got this far, you're so fuckin' dumb.
But now you're through. I'm gonna explain to you why and I
hope you're not too dumb to understand what I'm saying.
Okay?
Leo nods.
CHILI
Ray Bones is now the man you're dealing with. Ray Bones
finds out what you did, he's gonna want everything you have.
And when I say everything, I mean even that sporty little
hat if he wants it. Then after he takes all you got, he'll
most likely hit you with some kind of heavy object if he
doesn't shoot you, just so you won't tell on him.
Chili lets that sink in a minute.
CHILI
I won't do that. Take your stuff or hurt you. You have
three-ten in the case, right? I'm gonna take the three
hundred you scammed off the airline, but the rest of it, the
ten grand? I'm gonna borrow that and pay you back sometime.
Leo's squinting at him now . . .
LEO
You take all my money, but you're borrowing part of it?
CHILI
At eighteen percent, okay? And don't ask me no more fuckin'
questions. I'm leaving.
He picks up the briefrase as he rises from the sofa and Leo
gets out of his chair.
LEO
But you won't know where I am. I don't even know where I'll
be.
CHILI
I'll find you, Leo . . .
Chili reaches for the door, opens it and looks back at Leo .
. .
CHILI
You leave a trail like a fuckin' caterpillar.
INT. HALLWAY -- SAME TIME
As Chili starts for the elevator. Leo steps into his doorway
. . .
LEO
Wait a minute. What's this eighteen-percent-a-year shit? You
want to borrow ten, the vig's three bills a week. Fifteen
for the vig plus the ten, that's twenty-five big ones you go
a whole year, buddy! You hear me?
Chili stops, turns around. As he starts back, he sees Leo's
scared look just before he slams the door shut. Chili shakes
his head, starts back for the elevator.
EXT. GRIFFITH PARK -- NIGHT
Chili drives a dark road up into the park. He rounds a
corner, and we see an explosion of light up ahead as we come
upon . . .
A MOVIE SET
Chili pulls in behind a row of trailers. He gets out of the
car and heads for the set where Harry is now looking up at
the sky and yelling at someone . . .
HARRY
How's anyone gonna see anything from way up there?
CHILI
Hey, Harry.
HARRY
Yeah, Chili. Hi.
(looking up)
You're fifty feet in the air!
The DIRECTOR -- early twenties, dressed like a frat boy --
sits on a crane about fifty feet above the set . . .
DIRECTOR
Harry. I'm gonna boom down real fast, get a subjective
p-o-v.
CHILI
Listen, I talked to Karen. She's gonna think about helping
you out.
HARRY
Yeah, but whose point of view?
DIRECTOR
Whatta you mean, whose point of view; The audience's point
of view.
HARRY
Get down here. I wanna talk to you. Come on . . . right now
. . .
(to Chili)
She's gonna talk to Martin?
CHILI
She's thinking about it. I just need the key to your office.
I just told her I'd pick up a script.
Harry tosses Chili a key-ring.
HARRY
It's the red one. Take it off the ring.
Chili sits down in one of the director's chairs that sits
off to one side. He starts to take the key off the ring . .
.
VOICE
Your name Vicky Vespa?
Chili looks up at a bored-looking ACTRESS standing there in
a blood-soaked nightie.
CHILI
Excuse me?
ACTRESS
I asked you, is your name Vicky Vespa?
CHILI
No.
ACTRESS
Then get the fuck outta my chair.
Chili sits forward, sees her name printed on the back. He
gets up. As she sits down, we see an ICE PICK sticking out
the other side of her head. Chili sits back down next to her
in the chair with HARRY ZIMM on the back.
HARRY
(to the director)
What're you doing? I thought I told you to get down here?
The kid nods to the camera operator who lowers the crane as
we BOOM WAY UP. . .
HARRY
All these camera moves and weird angles and shit are gonna
distance us from the emotion of the scene.
DIRECTOR
What 'emotion?' Girl just got stabbed in the ear with an ice
pick.
HARRY
She's scared! Fear is an emotion!
(then)
Look, kid, if you remember anything from your time working
with Harry Zimm, let it be the three key words to
filmmaking.
The kid fiddles with the crane controls.
DIRECTOR
Yeah? What three words, Harry?
HARRY
Pick 'n' Save.
DIRECTOR
Hm?
HARRY
You heard me, Pick 'n' Save.
Harry turns so the rest of the crew can hear him . . .
HARRY
Now I'm gonna tell you a little story, happened to me years
ago when I was so broke I had to go to the Pick 'n' Save
over on Vine to buy a lousy candybar for my dinner.
Chili watches the crew stop what they're doing and listen.
HARRY
I'm standing in line waiting to pay my two bits when I
overhear this lady, call her Mildred, talking to the cashier
about a movie.
The Director gives a look to his assistant like 'Jesus, you
believe this shit?'
HARRY
So Mildred says to the cashier, 'I saw the new Streisand
picture.'
(gets into it the way Mildred did)
'God, I just love it at the end when she brushed Robert
Redford's hair off his forehead the way she did when they
were together, and the way they gave each other this look
that said they still loved each other, but knew they
couldn't be together. That look was so . . . romantic.'
DIRECTOR
That's great, Harry. So what's the --
HARRY
What she did not say was, 'I just loved the way the director
moved the camera so much it made me fuckin' seasick.' All
she cared about was that look. All she remembered was that
look. And why do we remember things in movies? Because we
can see them.
Harry's right in the guy's face now . . .
HARRY
So . . . keep this fuckin' camera down here on the ground
and shoot this scene, so we can see what the fuck is goin'
on, before I get someone over sixteen to fuckin' shoot it
for you!
Harry walks over to Chili, sees Chili sitting there. Chili
tosses Harry his key ring.
CHILI
Here's your keys, Harry.
HARRY
Get the fuck outta my chair.
EXT. HARRY ZIMM'S OFFICE -- NIGHT
As Chili pulls out front, gets out of the minivan, he looks
up, sees a light on in Harry's office.
INT. CORRIDOR -- NIGHT
Chili walks down the hallway, dark except for a light on at
the end of the hall . . .
INT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- NIGHT
Bo Catlett, reading glasses, script open in front of him,
looks up from Harry's desk as Chili steps into the office.
BO CATLETT
This ain't bad, you know it? This Mr. Lovejoy. Needs a
better ending but yeah, I can see why Harry wants to do it.
Chili says nothing, sits down in one of the red leather
chairs.
BO CATLETT
You understand I knew Harry was lying, saying this wasn't
any good, but holding on to it, man, like you have to break
his fingers to get it from him.
CHILI
That's funny, I was just wondering what I was gonna break of
yours to get it away from you.
Bo Catlett smiles at him, doesn't give up the script.
BO CATLETT
I'm just explaining to you what I'm doing here. Case you
think I come to rob the place, rip off any of this dusty old
shit the man has.
CHILI
I'd never make you as a burglar, not in that outfit.
Bo Catlett sits back in the chair a moment, watches Chili
light a cigarette . . .
BO CATLETT
Harry called you his associate, but what does that mean? I
never heard your name or read it in Variety or The Reporter
or anyplace.
CHILI
It's what he said, I'm his associate.
BO CATLETT
You must bring something heavy to the deal.
CHILI
That's right, me.
Bo Catlett picks up a piece of paper off the desk . . .
BO CATLETT
Says here you're getting Martin Weir for the part of
Lovejoy.
CHILI
Yeah, we're getting Martin.
BO CATLETT
No shit, come on. How you gonna do that?
CHILI
I put a gun right here . . .
(touches the side of his head)
. . . and I tell him, 'Sign the paper Marty or your fuckin'
dead.' Like that.
BO CATLETT
I wonder, would that work?
(then)
You know who I see for Al Roxy? Harvey Keitel. The man could
do it in his sleep.
CHILI
Harvey Keitel. Yeah. Maybe. He was pretty good in the movie
Fingers.
BO CATLETT
I missed that one. Or, hey, you know who else? Morgan
Freeman. You know Morgan?
CHILI
Yeah, Morgan Freeman. But he's a colored guy.
BO CATLETT
So what? Where's it say in this script he's white? Color is
what the part needs, man, somebody to do it has some style.
The way it is now, Ronnie could do it, play himself, some
cracked out asshole.
(then)
So whatta you think of the script?
Bo watches as Chili picks up a copy of the script, begins
flipping through it.
CHILI
Title's the first thing's got to go. And the guy's name. I
mean, even this writer's name, Murray Saffrin is better than
Lovejoy.
BO CATLETT
I'm with you on that. And don't you think it needs a good
female part? Increase the romance angle.
Chili flips through the script, sees a name . . .
CHILI
There's Ilona.
BO CATLETT
What about her?
CHILI
Get something going there.
BO CATLETT
With Ilona? You know how old Ilona is?
CHILI
She's . . . young.
BO CATLETT
Young? She's fuckin' nine-years-old, same age as Lovejoy's
kid. Bernie. One she calls Bernard. Have you read the
script?
CHILI
Yeah, I read it. I was just thinking you could make her
older. We might even be able to get Karen Flores.
BO CATLETT
Who?
CHILI
She's been out of movies a few years, but she's good. Real
good.
Bo Catlett studies Chili a moment, smiles . . .
BO CATLETT
You know what I'm thinkin'?
(leans forward)
You wanna make the girl older. I don't like the ending. We
could do that, you and me, sit down and write the script
over where it needs it.
Chili fips through the script a moment . . .
CHILI
You know how to write one of these?
BO CATLETT
There's nothin' to know. You have an idea, you write down
what you wanna say. Then you get somebody to add in the
commas and shit where they belong, if you aren't positive
yourself. Maybe fix up the spelling where you have some
tricky words . . . although I've seen scripts where I know
words weren't spelled right and there was hardly any commas
in it at all. So I don't think it's too important. Anyway,
you come to the last page you write in 'Fade out' and that's
the end, you're done.
CHILI
That's all there is to it, huh?
BO CATLETT
That's all.
Chili sits forward, stabs out his cigarette, exhales into Bo
Catlett's face . . .
CHILI
Then what do I need you for?
Bo Catlett starts for the door.
BO CATLETT
I really think I can be of service on this one.
CHILI
Yeah, well, we need a ride somewhere, we'll let you know.
EXT. NUART THEATER -- NIGHT
As Karen walks up to the box office. A Touch of Evil on the
marquis.
INT. MOVIE THEATER -- NIGHT
Not so full. Chili sits in the middle, watching the final
scene as Orson Welles gets blown away, falls into the oily
river. He can't take his eyes off the screen . . .
Karen comes in, starts up the aisle, looking for Chili. She
spots him, just as he mouths the dialogue along with Marlene
Dietrich . . .
MARLENE DIETRICH (O.S.)
He was some kind of man.
Karen smiles, decides to wait a moment. Chili, lost in the
movie . . . keeps mouthing the dialogue.
MARLENE DIETRICH (O.S.)
What does it matter what you say about people?
MORT MILLS (O.S.)
Good-bye, Tanya.
MARLENE DIETRICH
Adios.
As Tanya/Marlene Dietrich resumes her slow walk away, Karen
sits down at the end of the row. People start getting up to
leave. Chili turns to a GUY a few seats away from him . . .
CHILI
Wow, huh?
The guy gives Chili a look, puts his arm around his DATE,
and quickly starts up the aisle so that Chili can now see
Karen sitting there at the end of the row . . .
CHILI
You been here the whole time?
KAREN
I just caught the end.
She gets up, they start up the aisle together . . .
CHILI
You know, Welles didn't even wanna do that one. Some studio
made him do it. He owed 'em one and all his own movies lost
money.
(walking out now)
But, hey, sometimes that's when you do your best work, you
got a gun to your head . . .
EXT. NUART -- NIGHT
As Karen and Chili exit the theater, stand there a moment.
CHILI
I got you a copy of the script.
KAREN
I already read it. Harry left a copy at the house.
CHILI
What do you think?
She starts walking.
KAREN
I think it's not horrible.
CHILI
I don't like the title. Or the main guy's name.
KAREN
Then you've read it?
CHILI
Not yet.
KAREN
You and Harry'll make a great team.
(then)
I'm gonna make a deal with him.
CHILI
There a part in it for you?
KAREN
I don't want to act in it, I want to produce it with Harry.
Especially if I help him get Martin.
CHILI
Sounds fair.
KAREN
What do you get out of it?
He stops, looks at her.
CHILI
That why you came over here, to ask me that?
KAREN
I want to know.
CHILI
Why does anyone want to be in movies?
KAREN
Yesterday, you were a loan shark.
He starts walking again . . .
CHILI
I was never much into it. All that bullshit having to do
with respect. It's bad enough having to treat those guys
like they're your heroes, having to smile when they make
some stupid remark they think's real funny.
KAREN
And you think the movie business is any different?
CHILI
Yeah well . . . I like movies. I figure if I help Harry make
one, I'll find out what you have to do outside of have an
idea and raise the money. That doesn't sound too hard. I was
in the money business and I get ideas all the time.
They stop at her car.
KAREN
I'm talking to Martin tomorrow morning. I told Harry I'd
meet you and him at Abiquiu afterward.
(opens her door)
This might work, you never know.
He stands there, watching her drive away.
EXT. HARRY'S APARTMENT BUILDING -- NIGHT
Just above Franklin in the Hollywood Hills. A realtor might
call it Chandleresque. We call it old and cheap.
INT. HARRY'S APARTMENT -- NIGHT
Continuing on the old and cheap theme. Harry stands behind
the wet bar pouring himself a strong one. He looks at
himself in the smoke-tinted mirror squares, downs the drink
in one and pours himself another.
A KNOCK AT THE DOOR.
Harry looks at the door.
HARRY
Who is it?
WOMAN'S VOICE
Me.
HARRY
(lower)
Fuck.
WOMAN'S VOICE
I heard that.
Harry moves to the door and opens it to reveal DORIS SAFFRIN
-- fiftyish, fur coat, hair up so that we can see the nifty
necklare. She leans in the doorway . . .
HARRY
Hello, Doris.
DORIS
Harry Zimm. You look like a wet kiss.
And she plants one on him. Walks into the apartment. Looking
good for her age. Hell, for any age.
DORIS
Well, aren't you gonna offer me whatever it is you taste
like?
HARRY
Come on in.
Doris goes to the window. Harry goes to the bar, pours them
each a drink . . .
DORIS
What a spectacular view.
HARRY
Yeah, lovely. Last night I watched two guys carjack a Camero
down on the corner of Argyle there.
(hands her the drink)
What do you want, Doris?
She drinks, never taking her eyes off him.
DORIS
I miss Murray, Harry.
HARRY
Yeah, me too. He was a helluva good writer. And I would
know. I discovered him. Made him what he was.
DORIS
What he was, was a hack, couldn't get a job writing for
anybody but you.
(off Harry)
I'm being honest. He was a lousy writer, but he was a good
husband. I just didn't know it until too late.
Harry finishes his drink, pours himself another . . .
HARRY
Yeah, well, twenty-twenty hindsight and all that.
Harry takes a big, noisy pull off his drink as she moves to
the bar . . .
DORIS
I hate being alone. The house is so quiet. So lonely. It
needs . . .
(studies him)
A man's touch.
And with that, she opens up the fur coat to reveal that
she's wearing nothing but a garter belt and high heels.
HARRY
Nice garter.
She sets her drink down, moves in, wraps her arms around his
neck . . .
HARRY
I'm not sure how I feel about this, Doris.
DORIS
(reaching down)
You seem to feel fine about it.
HARRY
I mean morally. Murray was my friend.
DORIS
Murray's dead.
She kisses him . . . Harry pulls back . . .
HARRY
So this means you've reconsidered our deal on Mr. Lovejoy?
DORIS
No. But now that you mention it, I did talk to a handsome
executive at Paramount the other day . . . who just happened
to get his hands on the script.
HARRY
Yeah, what'd he have to say?
DORIS
He said if Martin's interested, I could get a half a million
for it easy. But don't worry, Harry, I'm still giving you
until Friday.
HARRY
How honorable of you.
Now she backs away, gives him a hurt look.
DORIS
Harry. If you want me to go, just say the word.
Harry looks at her a moment, decides . . .
HARRY
What the hell . . .
. . . And pulls her as close as we then . . .
DISSOLVE TO
EXT. HOLLYWOOD HILLS HOME -- NIGHT
We hear laughter, rock and roll as a NUDE WOMAN dives into a
blue-lit swimming pool and swims the length . . .
We then TILT UP to a HOUSE ON STILTS above this one and see
the lone figure of Bo Catlett standing on his deck.
EXT. BO CATLETT'S HOUSE -- NIGHT
The shimmering yellow grid of the city in the b.g., Bo
Catlett, barefoot, bathrobe, leans on the rail of his deck,
watching the folks frolic twelve stories down.
YAYO (V.O.)
Listen to me, man, I don't wan' no focking key. I wan' the
money.
EXT. BO CATLETT'S DECK -- NIGHT
Bo Catlett looks inside where Yayo paces back and forth. The
Bear reclines on a chaise lounge.
BO CATLETT
Hey, Yayo? You gonna smoke, get the hell off my
seventy-bucks-a-yard carpet.
Yayo steps out on to the deck . . .
BO CATLETT
I told you where the money is. All you gotta do is go get
it.
YAYO
No. I'll tell you something
BO CATLETT
That's all you know, huh? Wait here a minute, Yayo, I be
back directly.
Yayo leans against the railing, cuts a 'now that's the way
you get things done' look at the Bear. He lights a
cigarette, looks o.s. and freezes . . .
YAYO
The fock you doing with that?
Bo Catlett holds a big .45 out in front of him . . .
BO CATLETT
I'm taking you out, Yahoo.
. . . and shoots Yayo in the chest, the gun going off loud,
the round knocking the little Latin man back against the
railing.
BO CATLETT
Dead focking center, man.
Yayo, a stupid look on his face, stumbles backwards, over
the railing. The Bear reaches for him, but it's too late . .
.
EXT. HOUSE DOWN BELOW -- SAME TIME
The group down here is too stoned to notice the little
Colombian who falls from the deck high above like a sack of
dirt, then slides partway down the slope.
EXT. BO CATLETT'S DECK -- SAME TIME
The bear looks over at Bo Catlett . . . who now calmly
stares down at the motionless form of Yayo.
BO CATLETT
Shit, now someone's gotta climb down there and get him.
BEAR
You didn't have to shoot him, Bo. We coulda just beat him up
some.
BO CATLETT
You see that? The way the man just went right over?
Bo Catlett takes a sip of his drink, looks at the railing.
BO CATLETT
Maybe we can get Chili Palmer up here. You fix my railing to
give way like they do in the movies. Then I invite the man
out here, have a look at my view. Get him to lean over the
railing, see all the naked people down there . . . a tragic
accident, officer . . .
Bear looks at him.
BEAR
Cat, that's the lamest idea I've ever heard.
BO CATLETT
Yeah, well, I'm bored, Bear. I wanna make movies.
Bear looks at him.
BO CATLETT
I mean, what's the point of living in L.A. if you're not in
the movie business?
Bo Catlett leans on the railing, looks down at Yayo again.
BO CATLETT
And I mean high up in it.
(turns to Bear)
That's why Harry's gonna make Mr. Lovejoy with me, not Chili
Palmer.
BEAR
Mr. Lovejoy? That's cute, Bo.
BO CATLETT
Doesn't matter what it's called, Harry's got Martin Weir and
it's gonna be big.
BEAR
They all sound big at the talking stage.
EXT. MARTIN WEIR'S HOUSE -- MORNING
Karen pulls into the driveway in a convertible BMW. As she
checks her make-up in the REARVIEW MIRROR, we see Chili pull
up behind her in his rented minivan. She turns aronnd,
frowns, and quickly gets out of her car.
He gets out of the van . . . holds up a Star Map . . .
CHILI
This thing's actually accurate. I bought it for ten bucks
from a kid in a lawn chair on Sunset . . .
KAREN
You were supposed to wait for me with Harry at the
restaurant.
Chili points to a star on the map . . .
CHILI
See, here it is . . . Martin Weir's house . . . right across
the steet from George Hamilton.
VOICE
Chili, Jesus!
They both look to the front door where a tall, skinny WOMAN
with wild, jet black hair stands.
WOMAN
It is you . . .
She comes bounding down the steps, runs over and gives him a
hug . . . Karen can't believe what she sees.
CHILI
Nicole?
WOMAN
It's Nicki now. I don't believe this.
CHILI
Me neither.
(to Karen)
We know each other.
Karen smiles
'How 'bout that.' Then looks at Nicki.
KAREN
Hello, Nicki.
NICKI
Karen. Shit. I didn't see you there. How are you?
Karen starts to answer, but Nicki's already hustling Chili
inside . . .
INT. MARTIN WEIR'S HOUSE -- DAY
White everything. Way off in the b.g., a view on to the huge
backyard. A pool man cleans the pool. A gardener blows the
leaves.
Martin's extensive photography collection lines the walls.
Chili steps inside, checks some of them out
most of the photographs are of Martin.
NICKI
Martin will be out in a minute.
(to Karen)
Chili was the only one at Momo's didn't hit on me.
KAREN
What a gentleman.
NICKI
You like my hair?
(reaches up, touches it)
Black like this?
CHILI
It's nice. Especially under your arms.
Somehow this makes Karen feel better.
NICKI
Martin won't let me shave. I guess I fill some need. Brings
him back to the sixties or something.
Karen turns as we hear a TOILET FLUSH somewhere o.s.
NICKI
(looks o.s.)
Speak of the devil . . .
Chili follows her gaze and we see . . .
MARTIN
as he comes down the stairs, checking the front of his
trousers. He and Karen spot each other. Both look
uncomfortable for a fraction of a second, then Martin
hurries over to her . . .
MARTIN
Karen. Wow. Look at you . . .
KAREN
Hello, Martin.
He hugs her and hangs on, leaving Nicki and Chili standing
there like idiots.
MARTIN
Mmmmm. You smell terrific.
(to Nicki)
She always smelled so good.
NICKI
(thrilled)
Neat.
(then)
Martin, this is Chili Palmer.
MARTIN
Chili is it?
CHILI
Yesh, a pleasure, Martin.
NICKI
Chili's a gangster. Ran a club I used to play at for another
gangster back in Miami. How is Momo these days anyway?
CHILI
Dead.
Karen fights a smile. Nicki nods solemnly . . .
NICKI
Bummer.
(then)
Well, I'll let you all get to your movie talk. Chili, make
sure you say good-bye before you leave.
CUT TO
A PORTRAIT OF MARTIN WEIR
Done in cracked oils, the whole bit.
PULL BACK TO REVEAL
MARTIN'S LIVING ROOM
Martin, Karen and Chili all sit on white couches. Martin is
checking out Karen, nodding . . .
MARTIN
I'm sitting here, I'm looking at you and I'm having these
flashes. You know, flashbacks, of memories.
(touches her hair)
Of us.
KAREN
Really.
MARTIN
Yeah and I'm wondering, how did it go wrong? How did it all
. . . slip away?
KAREN
'It' didn't slip away, Martin, you did . . . when you went
off to fuck Nicki in the middle of my birthday party.
Martin brings his hand back, nods, lost in thought . . .
MARTIN
Yeah. That was a good party.
CHILI
You know, Marty, you were good in The Cyclone.
MARTIN
Martin. It was a beautiful role. All I had to do was find
the character's center, the stem I'd used to wind him up and
he'd play, man, he'd play.
Karen looks like she wants to throw up.
CHILI
Well, you had it down cold. Watching you in the movie, if I
didn't know better I'd have to believe you were a made guy
and not acting. Even the fink part. I never met a fink and I
hope to God I never do, but how you did it must be the way
finks act.
MARTIN
A few weeks before shooting, I went back to Bensonhurst,
just to listen to you guys. See, I'm Italian, but I grew up
in Tarzana. So I wanted to pick up your rhythms of speech.
CHILI
We talk different?
MARTIN
It's more like your attitude. Your tone, your speech
patterns demonstrate a certain confidence in yourselves, in
your opinions, your indifference to conventional views.
CHILI
You mean like we don't give a shit.
MARTIN
Yeah. Kinda. Anyway, once I have the authentic sounds of
speech, the rhythms, man, the patois, I can actually begin
to think the way those guys do, get inside their heads.
Chili exchanges a look with Karen who sits back now. Ready
to give up.
CHILI
Okay, I'm one of those guys you mentioned. I'm actually one
of 'em. What am I thinking?
Martin looks at Chili . . .
MARTIN
Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying an actual metamorphosis
takes place. That wouldn't be acting.
Karen looks at Martin, shakes her head.
CHILI
So you don't know what I'm thinking.
MARTIN
No, I don't. Though I have to say I'm curious.
CHILI
So you want to know.
MARTIN
If you'd like to tell me, yeah.
CHILI
I'm thinking of a movie.
MARTIN
One of mine?
CHILI
One we're producing.
MARTIN
With what? Wiseguy money?
Martin cracks himself up. Karen and Chili crack up with him,
Karen leaning into Chili . . .
KAREN
Maybe this was a bad idea.
But Chili keeps looking at Martin.
CHILI
Martin, I'm not connected to those people anymore. Not since
I walked out of a loan-shark Operation in Miami.
MARTIN
What happened? The pressure got to you?
CHILI
Pressure? I'm the one applied the pressure.
Chili sits back. Karen is starting to enjoy Chili's handling
of Martin . . .
CHILI
You're an actor, you like to pretend. Imagine you're the
shylock. A guy owes you fifteen grand and he skips, leaves
town. What do you do?
Chili watches as the movie star hunches over, narrows his
shoulders. For a few moments he holds his hands together in
front of him, getting a shifty look in his eyes. Karen
shakes her head . . .
KAREN
Oh, for Christ's sake --
MARTIN
I know. I'm doing Shylock instead of a shylock. Okay, what's
my motivation? The acquisition of money. To collect. Inflict
pain if I have to.
Karen watches as Martin stares at Chili, his expression
gradually becoming deadpan, sleepy . . .
MARTIN
Guy owes me fifteen large and takes off, I go after him. The
fuck you think I do?
CHILI
Martin, look at me.
MARTIN
I'm looking at you.
So is Karen, for that matter.
CHILI
No, I want you to look at me the way I'm looking at you. Put
it in your eyes, 'You're mine, asshole,' without saying it.
MARTIN
Like this?
CHILI
What you're telling me, you're tired? You wanna go to bed?
MARTIN
Wait. How about this?
CHILI
Now you're squinting like you need glasses.
Karen looks away now, fighting a smile.
CHILI
Look at me. I'm thinking, You're mine. I fuckin' own you.
What I'm not doing is feeling anything about it one way or
the other. You understand? You're not a person to me, you're
a name in my collection book, a guy owes me money, that's
all.
Martin nods, gives Chili a nice dead-eyed look. Karen is
thoroughly enjoying Chili's manipulation of Martin.
MARTIN
How about this?
CHILI
That's not bad.
MARTIN
That's what I think of you, asshole. Nothing.
CHILI
I believe it.
MARTIN
I turn it on when I confront the guy.
CHILI
Yeah, but you haven't found him yet.
(then)
The guy took off for Las Vegas.
MARTIN
How do I know that?
Karen looks at Chili as he sits back . . .
CHILI
The guy's wife tells you . . .
INT. ABIQUIU RESTAURANT -- DAY
Two floors, the upstairs with a railing overlooking the bar.
Harry, a drink in front of him, sits in a big corner booth
upstairs. He checks his watch . . .
VOICE
Harry, how you doing?
Harry looks up to see Bo Catlett, dressed up as usual,
standing there with the Bear, wearing a Hawaiian shirt.
HARRY
Bo. I'm great. Listen, I'm expecting some people --
BO CATLETT
You must be makin' some big deals, doin' lunch in a place
like this?
HARRY
I'm working on a few things.
BO CATLETT
Yeah, I hear you bagged Martin Weir for Mr. Lovejoy.
HARRY
Boy, this town. Word gets around, doesn't it?
Harry chuckles, takes a sip of his drink.
BO CATLETT
Chili Palmer told me.
Harry's smile goes away.
BO CATLETT
Last night. When he called me over to your office to talk
about it.
HARRY
Chili Palmer showed you my script?
BO CATLETT
Yeah, I was wondering why he should do that.
INT. MARTIN WEIR'S HOUSE -- SAME TIME
Martin is leaning forward . . . Hooked . . .
MARTIN
The wife sues the airline.
(nods)
This is a gutsy babe.
CHILI
Good-looking, too.
(turns to look at her)
Like Karen.
Chili smiles at her. Martin leans forward.
MARTIN
So when do I meet up with the husband and give him the look?
CHILI
It's not that simple. You have to be careful. There's
another guy that comes along, a hard-on you owe some money
to. A mob guy. Wants to take you out anyway, on account of a
past situation.
MARTIN
Okay. I'm listening.
Chili stops; he doesn't know what else to say. Martin waits,
then looks at him a moment . . .
CHILI
At that point, basically, that has to be it.
MARTIN
You're not going to tell me the rest?
KAREN
Well actually, Martin the movie we came to talk about is Mr.
Lovejoy.
CHILI
Yeah. We understand you read the script and like it . . . a
lot.
MARTIN
Refresh my memory . . .
CONTINUED
INT. ABIQUIU -- SAME TIME
Harry drains his drink. Bo Catlett exchanges a look with the
Bear, then . . .
BO CATLETT
Listen, Harry, how would you like to get your hands on five
hundred grand? You pay me back at your convenience, no
interest.
HARRY
You serious?
BO CATLETT
All I want in return is to work on the movie with you. Fact
I already got some ideas on how to fix it up.
Bo Catlett signals the waiter . . .
BO CATLETT
How 'bout another one for Mr. Zimm. A double.
HARRY
You're gonna just give me five hundred grand?
BO CATLETT
We'll talk about that, Harry. But first I gotta know, how'd
you hook up with Chili Palmer.
EXT. MARTIN WEIR'S HOUSE -- DAY
Karen, Martin, and Chili walk out to the driveway.
MARTIN
Lemme talk to Buddy, set up a meeting.
CHILI
Buddy?
KAREN
Lufkin. His . . . agent.
MARTIN
Yeah, Karen knows him.
KAREN
But you are interested?
MARTIN
I'm intrigued, yeah. You know what might help you, take a
look at the Cylone again, the way a visual fabric is
maintained even while the metaphor plays on different
levels. Hey --
(nods to minivan)
This your ride, Chili?
Chili follows Martin over to the minivan, opens the door for
him.
MARTIN
Very nice . . .
CHILI
Yeah, I like it, I'm high up, I can see everything, you
know? It's the Cadillac of minivans.
MARTIN
What's that?
CHILI
Compass.
MARTIN
Wow.
(then)
Mind if I take it for a spin?
INT. ABIQUIU RESTAURANT -- DAY
Bo Catlett and Harry are laughing as Harry, very drunk now
finishes another drink . . .
BO CATLETT
He was watching Letterman, huh? Sneaky, that Chili Palmer.
(signals the waiter, then)
So, he ever find this dry cleaner, the one with all that
money on him?
HARRY
Leo, I don't know.
Bo Catlett and the Bear look at each other.
BO CATLETT
I bet he did and he ain't givin' you a penny of it, help you
out. Not the way I am.
Harry looks at Bo, can't believe what's happening to his
life, thinks a moment, then . . .
HARRY
Assuming I go along with this, when can I have the five
hundred?
BO CATLETT
Whenever you want it. The money's in hundred dollar bills
inside one of those jock bags, you know? In a locker at the
airport, waiting to be picked up.
HARRY
The airport.
BO CATLETT
It was waiting out there on another deal, one that didn't go
through; one you don't want to know about.
Harry shakes his head, looks around the restaurant. Bo and
the Bear exchange looks, then . . .
HARRY
I don't know.
BO CATLETT
It's not the kind of thing you do.
Another glance at the Bear, then . . .
BO CATLETT
That's why I was thinking you could send your boy Chili
Palmer. He gets busted or hit on the head you aren't out
nothing.
And with that, Bo Catlett calmly slides an ORANGE KEY across
the table to Harry. Harry stares at it. It has the number
C-18 printed on the flat orange part.
HARRY
C-18.
BO CATLETT
That's the magic number.
BEAR
Cat . . .
And they all look . . .
DOWNSTAIRS
as Chili and Karen enter the restaurant. Chili checks out
the bar, sees they aren't there, then looks up at the
railing . . . keeps his eyes up there as he says . . .
CHILI
Wait here.
Chili moves to the staircase, now sees the Bear in his
Hawaiian shirt standing a few steps from the top.
Chili gets within three steps of the guy and stops, but
doesn't look up, keeps his eyes fixed on the man's gut.
BO CATLETT
I'd like you to meet my associate, the Bear. Movie stuntman
and champion weightlifter, as you might've noticed. Picks up
and throws out things I don't want.
Chili doesn't move, keeps his eyes on the man's crotch.
BEAR
We think you ought to turn around and go back to Miami.
Chili slowly moves his gaze up through hibiscus until he's
looking at the man's bearded face . . .
CHILI
So you're a stuntman. Are you any good?
The Bear grins and turns his head to the side, as if too
modest to answer and will let Bo Catlett speak for him.
This makes the next move easier . . . the guy not even
looking as Chili grabs a handful of his crotch, steps aside
and yanks him off the fucking stairs.
The Bear yells out of pain and fear as the beefy guy rolls
all the way down the stairs to land on the main floor, a few
feet away from where Karen now stands.
Chili keeps watching until he sees the guy move, then looks
up at Bo Catlett who's now coming down . . .
CHILI
Not bad for a guy his size.
Chili continues up the stairs to where Bo Catlett stands
beside the table. Chili unbuttons his coat . . .
CHILI
I'll make you a deal. If you can get out of here before I
take my coat off, I won't clean the floor with you, get your
little costume all messed up.
Karen watches now as Bo Catlett puts a hand in his coat
packet, steps right up to Chili . . .
BO CATLETT
You don't know me. You only think you do.
Bo walks past Chili, goes down the stairs. Chili watches as
Bo Catlett helps the Bear get to his feet. They leave the
restaurant, the Bear looking over his shoulder at Chili.
Even Karen is looking at him differently now as they slide
into the booth with a now shocked, rapidly sobering Harry.
CHILI
Rough business this movie business. I may have to go back to
loan sharking for a rest.
Harry doesn't say anything. Karen looks at him.
KAREN
Harry, what're you still doing with those guys?
HARRY
He happens to be loaning me five hundred grand, no strings,
I write any kind of agreement I want.
CHILI
Is he giving you a check or cash?
HARRY
Cash. It happens to be waiting right at this moment in a
locker at the airport.
KAREN
A locker at the airport? Jesus Christ, Harry. Tell me you're
not really that stupid.
CHILI
The guy's setting you up. You pulled out of their Freaks
deal so he's paying you back.
HARRY
Oh, is that right? I'm being set up? Then how come Catlett
said I should send you out to get it, since you haven't done
a fucking thing for me since you got into this . . . except
showing Bo Catlett my script?
Chili looks at Karen, smiles, shakes his head . . .
CHILI
Okay, Harry, I'm wrong. You're not the one he's setting up.
HARRY
I mean, at least Bo's invested in three of my movies.
KAREN
Harry, we spoke with Martin.
HARRY
'We?'
KAREN
Chili and me.
Harry looks at the two of them, differently now . . .
HARRY
Really.
CHILI
Yeah, he wants us to talk to Buddy, set up a meeting.
HARRY
A meeting with who? You and Karen?
KAREN
Harry --
HARRY
Man's in town two days, thinks he's David O. fucking
Selznick.
Karen and Chili look at each other as Harry finishes his
drink.
HARRY
So how 'bout it, Mr. Selznick, do I make my deal with Bo? Or
you gonna finally help me out, have a word with your dry
cleaner when you find him.
CHILI
I found him.
Harry looks at him.
CHILI
Forget about Leo's money, Harry.
HARRY
You have it?
CHILI
Harry, if I gave you Leo's money you'd have Ray Bones all
over your ass and then you'd be in a whole new kinda
trouble.
HARRY
Who?
CHILI
Ray Barboni. Guy from Miami, owns Leo now that Momo died.
HARRY
Who the fuck is Momo? Jesus, these fucking names . . .
CHILI
Tell you what, Harry, tomorrow morning, when the airport's
crowded, I'll go check it out. If I don't see a problem,
I'll pick up the money . . .
KAREN
I wouldn't get my hopes up, Harry.
Harry thinks a moment, lays the key on the table, but keeps
his hand on it.
HARRY
Maybe I oughta talk to this Ray Bones character myself. See
if he wants to invest in my movie.
CHILI
Don't waste your time, Harry. The guy's not much of a movie
fan. Now c'mon, gimme the key.
Harry finally lifts his hand.
EXT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- NIGHT
A light on upstairs . . .
HARRY (V.O.)
Bones. B-O-N-E-S.
INT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- SAME TIME
Harry sits at his desk, the phone cradled to his ear, a
half-empty bottle of scotch in front of him.
OPERATOR
(PHONE)
I show a 'Dem Bones Barbecue' in Dade County, but that's
all.
HARRY
Oh. Wait a minute. That's not his real name. It's uh . . .
uh . . . yeah -- try Barboni. B-a-r-b-o-n-i.
INT. RAY BONES' APARTMENT -- NIGHT
We start CLOSE ON A TELEPHONE . . . THE PHONE RINGS and we
BOOM UP to reveal a CLOSED DOOR across the room . . .
INT. BATHROOM -- SAME TIME
Ray Bones nests on the can, humming off key, reading Weir'D
Tales, Martin Weir's autobiography. He looks up, listens to
the PHONE RING.
BONES
Fuck.
The phone KEEPS RINGING. Bones thinks about it a moment,
then tosses the book aside . . .
BONES
Fuck fuck fuck fuck . . .
INT. FRONT ROOM -- SAME TIME
As Bones bursts out of the john and grabs the phone.
BONES
What?
INTERCUTTING HARRY & RAY BONES
Phone to his ear, Harry downs another drink, sits up.
HARRY
Ray Barboni?
BONES
Who is this?
HARRY
Are you the guy they called Ray Bones?
BONES
Depends. Who's this?
HARRY
Who is this? I'm the one telling you the way it is, okay,
asshole? That's who I am. Now you want your three hundred
grand or don't you?
BONES
What three hundred grand?
HARRY
The three hundred grand a guy named Leo Devoe scammed off an
airline. The three hundred grand Chili Palmer now has in his
possession.
Okay. This gets Bones' attention.
HARRY
Hello? You there?
BONES
Yeah, I'm here. I just don't like the anonymous crap. It
means your either chickenshit or not for real.
HARRY
Yeah? Well, trust me. I'm very for real.
BONES
Okay. So who are you?
HARRY
I work for Harry Zimm, alright?
BONES
Who?
HARRY
Harry Zimm. The man happens to be a major Hollywood player.
BONES
Never heard of him.
HARRY
Maybe that's because you've never been out've fuckin' Miami,
dipshit. Maybe it's time you got on a plane, flew out to
L.A. and took a meeting with Mr. Zimm.
Bones sits down, trying to put this together . . .
BONES
So, what, this Zimm guy asking for some kinda finders fee,
that what we're talking about here?
HARRY
Hey, Zimm doesn't ask for dick. Zimm tells you the way it is
. . . or else.
BONES
Or else what?
HARRY
Or else use your fucking imagination.
Harry hangs up at the other end. Bones stares at the phone.
CONTINUED
INT. HARRY'S OFFICE -- SAME TIME
He sits there a moment, also staring at the phone.
HARRY
Motherfucker.
He then realizes his hands are shaking, grabs the bottle and
pours the rest of the scotch down his throat.
EXT. LAX -- SOVEREIGN TERMINAL -- MORNING
Busy. Travelers moving along the sidewalk. Here comes Chili
. . . he enters the terminal and we . . .
INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL -- DAY
CUT TO
A ROW OF LOCKERS
All with keys sticking out of them except one. We push in on
that one . . . C-18.
CHILI
stands between rows of lockers on either side of him. He
studies them a moment longer, then looks up at the ARRIVALS
MONITOR. He starts writing something on a CARD as we push
past him . . . pushing in on #83 from NEWARK . . .
INT. AIRPORT GIFT SHOP -- DAY
As Chili buys an L.A. LAKERS T-SHIRT and a BLACK CANVAS
ATHLETIC BAG. He pauses to check out the magazine rack,
Martin Weir is on the cover of everything including his
hardback autobiography "WEIR'D TALES". He grabs a copy . . .
Chili puts the book and the T-shirt inside the athletic bag,
puts that inside the papergift shop bag, and then looks
around . . .
A SCRUFFY LOOKING KID
Eighteen or so, checking out the skin magazines as Chili
comes up behind him.
CHILI
You want to make five bucks, take you two minutes?
The kid looks at him, but doesn't answer.
CHILI
You go over to those lockers over there and put this in
C-17.
The kid still doesn't say anything.
CHILI
It's a surprise for my wife. But you have to do it quick,
okay? While she's in the can.
That sonuds like it makes sense, so the kid nods . . .
KID
Yeah, okay.
Chili gives him the paper bag with his purchases, a five
dollar bill and three quarters. He watches as . . .
The kid walks over to the row of lockers . . . puts the
quarters into C-17, opens it, puts the stuff inside, pulls
the key and then walks back over to Chili, and hands him the
key . . .
CHILI
Thanks.
EXT. AIRPORT -- DAY
As a plane touches down . . .
INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL -- DAY
As Chili watches the last few passengers come off the plane.
He watches them come through the gate until he's standing
there by himself.
Okay, he turns and walks down the aisle now to the bank of
lockers three high where C-18 is just about in the middle.
He looks both ways, takes his time until a group of people
pass behind, giving him a screen, giving him just time
enough to open C-17, grab the black athletic bag, and close
the locker.
Chili gets about ten yards down the aisle, heading for
daylight, when a BLACK GUY IN A SUIT comes towards him and
stops right in his path . . .
BLACK GUY/CURTIS
Excuse me, sir . . .
Now there's a BIG GUY IN A PLAID WOOL SHIRT next to him, the
same guy we saw when Bo Catlett was here. And Christ,
ANOTHER GUY now, this one down the aisle, talking on his
hand radio. The Black Guy has his I.D. folder open . . .
BLACK GUY/CURTIS
Curtis. Drug Enforcement. These are Agents Dunbar and
Morgan, would you come with us, please?
CHILI
What's wrong? What's this about?
Agent Curtis turns and starts off
DUNBAR
Let's follow him and behave ourselves. What do you say?
As Chili w