Young Frankenstein

BÜRGERMEISTER

That swine!

SECOND VILLAGER

It's in the blood, sir. The whole family is insane.

THIRD VILLAGER

He's got to be put away.

FOURTH VILLAGER

And the monster destroyed!

ASSORTED VILLAGERS

Yes! The monster! Kill the monster! The monster must be destroyed!

BÜRGERMEISTER

Now see here! Before we go running about, killing people, we'd better make damned sure of our facts. A riot is an ugly thing... and once you get one started – there's little chance of stopping it short of bloodshed.

"Groans" of disappointment from assorted Villagers.

BÜRGERMEISTER

So the first thing we'll do, is march calmly up to the Frankenstein castle and have a nice little chat with our good doctor. Now then! Who doesn't have a torch and a dog? All right – follow me!

ASSORTED VILLAGERS

Yay! Down with Frankenstein! Kill the monster!

They all run off ahead of the Bürgermeister.

CUT TO:

INT. INGA'S BEDROOM – NIGHT

Freddy and Inga are under the sheets. Only their faces can be SEEN.

FREDDY

It wouldn't be right... you know that.

INGA

Yes, I know.

FREDDY

It wouldn't be fair to her.

INGA

Yes, I know.

FREDDY

You've got to help me to remain faithful.

INGA

Yes, I will.

FREDDY

... But an intellectual relationship, like this – we could have as often as we wanted. Three times a day –anything!

CUT TO:

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD – NIGHT

The angry Villagers are marching and shouting, gathering up steam on their way to the Frankenstein castle.

CUT TO:

INT. ELIZABETH'S BEDROOM – NIGHT

Elizabeth is just finished brushing her hair, humming quietly to herself. She stands up and blows out the candles near her mirror.

She walks to some French doors that open onto a small balcony. She opens the glass doors and looks at:

ANGLE ON MOON

Bright and full.

BACK TO SEEN

She takes a breath of fresh air, then closes the doors and walks to her large double bed. She slips off her robe – revealing her thin body in delicate nightgown. Suddenly she hears:

"MMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmmmm."

She turns towards the French doors and listens. She decides that it was nothing and gets into bed.

CUT TO:

EXT. THE CASTLE – NIGHT

The Bürgermeister and the Villagers are at the steps of the castle. the Bürgermeister pounds on the front door.

CUT BACK TO:

ELIZABETH'S BEDROOM

Elizabeth lies in bed, illuminated be the flames from her fireplace.

There is the soft SOUND of CURTAINS FLAPPING.

The French doors have been opened – the silk curtains flapping from a breeze outside.

CUT BACK TO:

EXT. CASTLE

The Bürgermeister pounds louder and louder on the front door. Finally the door opens and Freddy appears in his robe. He looks at the angry mob.

BÜRGERMEISTER

Frederick Frankenstein?

FREDDY

You have the wrong house.

BÜRGERMEISTER

And who might you be?

FREDDY

Dr. Frederick Fronkonsteen.

BÜRGERMEISTER

The grandson of Victor 'Fronkonsteen'?

FREDDY

No!

BÜRGERMEISTER

What was your grandfather's name?

FREDDY

Victor Frankenstein.

Pause, as the Bürgermeister tries to fit the pieces together.

CUT BACK TO:

ELIZABETH'S BEDROOM

Elizabeth has a contented smile on her face. Her eyes are closed.

A LARGE SHADOW grows against the wall behind her.

The shadow crosses her face and blots out her key light from the fireplace.

She opens her eyes and looks ahead. Her face freezes in terror.

CUT BACK TO:

EXT. THE CASTLE

BÜRGERMEISTER

Forgive me for intruding so late at night, Herr Baron. But an ugly rumor has it that there are strange goings on in this castle. These good citizens are ready to rip you from limb to limb unless you can offer some rational explanation for their fears. How say you?

FREDDY

Ugly, vicious rumous.

A BLOODCURDLING SCREAM!

ASSORTED VILLAGERS

What was that? Listen! Did you hear that?

BÜRGERMEISTER

They say, also, that you have recreated the horrible monster who, for so many years, has haunted and terrorized the God-fearing people of this village. What say you to that?

FREDDY

Poppycock!

Igor comes running out from inside the castle.

IGOR

He's back! He's back! The monster's back!

Everyone looks at Freddy.

FREDDY

What monster?

IGOR

What d'ya mean "What monster?" You remember... the one we madein the basement.

Everyone looks at Freddy
 

FREDDY

I think we all need a good night's sleep. Why don't we meet next week and thrash this thing out?

BÜRGERMEISTER

Now wait a minute!

IGOR

You don't understand, Master. The big fellow's broken in and kidnapped your fiancée.

FREDDY

What???

IGOR

He's carrying her off now through the woods.

Freddy, the Bürgermeister and Igor run around to the side of the castle. The Villagers follow.

CUT TO:

EXT. SIDE OF CASTLE

The Monster can just be SEEN, far below, disappearing into the woods (SEVEN TREES AND A BACKDROP). Elizabeth is slung over his back.

ASSORTED VILLAGERS

There he is! That's the monster! After him!

Kill him!

The Bürgermeister and all the Villagers run off after the Monster, leaving Freddy an Igor alone.

IGOR

What now, boss? A little something to eat and then join the chase?

FREDDY

No! The only hope now is to get him back here. If I can just find a way to relieve the pressure on his cerebellum...

IGOR

That sound good, boss.

FREDDY

... and equalize the imbalance in his cerebrospinal fluid...

IGOR

I like your style, master. How do we get him here?

FREDDY

There's only one way.

IGOR

I'll bet it's a doozy.

DISSOLVE TO:

EXT. WOODS – NIGHT

The Bürgermeister and the Villagers are on the hunt.

The Bürgermeister is being pulled along by a GREAT DANE.

THE VILLAGERS

Climb little hills and rocks. OTHER DOGS are BARKING ferociously.

BÜRGERMEISTER

There he is!