Young Frankenstein

Inga operates two "INTAKE" – "OUTPUT" gauges.

IGOR

It's the waiting I can't stand.

CUT TO:

INT. PRIVATE LIBRARY

Frau Blucher sits in a chair, bare-chested.

She is flaggelating herself with a handful of thin branches.

She mumbles some mysterious prayer in German – occasionally looking out through a crack in the door to see what is happening to "her" monster and Freddy.

CUT BACK TO:

INT. LABORATORY

IGOR

How do you know they're done?

INGA

The doctor said to allow seven minutes: no more and no less – or else they could both become hopelessly paralyzed.

CUT TO:

A GIANT CLOCK ON THE WALL

With a "sweep" second hand. It is FOUR MINUTES AFTER TEN.

BACK TO SCENE

IGOR

How long is it so far?

INGA

Four

IGOR

Three minutes to go!

INGA

Yes.

IGOR

What d'ya want to do to kill time?

INGA

Oh, Igor – I'm so afraid! I just hope this all ends well.

Igor looks into the LENS of the CAMERA.

CUT TO:

EXT. COUNTRY ROAD – NIGHT

The Bürgermeister and the Villagers are almost at the front door.

CUT BACK TO:

INT. LABORATORY

Inga and Igor watch over the two bodies.

CUT TO:

THE CLOCK

It is FIVE MINUTES AFTER TEN.

CUT TO:

EXT. CASTLE – NIGHT

The Villagers are pounding on the front door.

CUT TO:

INT. PRIVATE LIBRARY

Frau Blucher is at the height of her self-flagellation. She is almost in ecstasy.

FRAU BLUCHER

Oh, yes! Oh, yes, yes, yes!

CUT TO:

THE CLOCK

It is FIVE AND A HALF MINUTES AFTER TEN.

CUT TO:

EXT. CASTLE – NIGHT

The villagers are RAMONG THE FRONT DOOR DOWN with a giant pole.

CUT TO:

INT. LABORATORY

INGA

Igor – are you sure the monster has a good brain? Are you absolutely certain that you took the brain of Hans Delbruck that night?

IGOR

Absolutely! May my mother grow two heads if I'm not telling the truth.

CUT TO:

A TWO-HEADED OLD LADY

Rocking in a chair.

CUT TO:

EXT. CASTLE – NIGHT

The front door gives way. The Bürgermeister and the Villagers burst into the castle.

CUT TO:

INT. RECEPTION HALL

The Villagers scatter every way, in search of the doctor and the monster.

CUT TO:

THE CLOCK

It is SIX MINUTES AND TWENTY SECONDS AFTER TEN.

INT. LABORATORY

INGA

(looking up as she hears the Villagers)

What's that noise?

IGOR

Sounds like visitors. It's all right – Frau Blucher will show them in.

CUT TO:

INT. PRIVATE LIBRARY

Frau Blucher is dripping wet from the passion of her climax.

FRAU BLUCHER

Victor. Victor! I'm coming. I'm comming, Victor!

CUT TO:

INT. LABORATORY

Villagers come pouring down the stairs and into the laboratory.

FIRST VILLAGER

There they are!