YOU'VE GOT MAIL

 INT. VINCE MANCINI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

 A publication party for an author named VINCE MANCINI.  A mix
 of book people, journalists and various other media folk.

        FRANK
  Hey, Vince.  Congratulations.  You know
  Kathleen Kelly.

        VINCE
  How are you?

        FRANK
  Guess who I saw today on the subway?
  William Spungeon.

        VINCE
  I thought he was in Mexico.

 They start chatting.

 Across the room, Joe is with Patricia, who is telling two
 other people the story of meeting the rabbi in the taxicab.
 Joe looks over and sees Kathleen.  He suddenly looks
 stricken.

 Shifts his position so Kathleen can't see his face, but
 sneaks a look.

        PATRICIA
  Would you get me another drink, sweetie?
  I'm all out.
   (continues chattering)
  So then the rabbi says, "It's a very good
  place to calm down."  Isn't that
  hysterical?

 They all laugh.  Joe moves over to the bar.

        JOE
  Absolut on the rocks.

 As he is waiting, Kathleen comes up next to him.

        KATHLEEN
  A white wine, please.
   (very friendly)
  Oh, hello.

        JOE
  Hi.

        KATHLEEN
  Remember me, from the bookstore?

        JOE
  Of course I remember you.

        KATHLEEN
  How's your aunt?

        JOE
  Good.  She's good.
   (gets his drink)
  I have to deliver this.  I have a very
  thirsty date.  She's part camel.

 Kathleen laughs.

        KATHLEEN
  Joe.  It's Joe, isn't it?

        JOE
  And you're Kathleen.

 Joe vanishes into the party.

 INT. VINCE MANCINI'S APARTMENT - NIGHT - A MINUTE LATER

        VINCE
  I can't believe you were talking to Joe
  Fox.

        KATHLEEN
  Joe Fox?  As in --

 She can't even finish the sentence.

 INT. VINCE MANCINI'S APARTMENT - A COUPLE OF MINUTES LATER

 Joe is standing at a table of food, his back to the room.

        KATHLEEN
  Fox?  Your last name is Fox?

 Joe spins around, looks at her.

        JOE
  F-O-X.

        KATHLEEN
  God, I didn't realize.  I didn't know who
  you --
   (she trails off)

        JOE
  -- were with.
   (quoting)
  "I didn't know who you were with."

        KATHLEEN
  Excuse me?

        JOE
  It's from the Godfather.  When the movie
  producer realizes that Tom Hagen is the
  emissary of Vito Corleone --
   (continued)

 Kathleen is staring at him.

        JOE (cont'd)
  -- just before the horse's head ends up
  in his bed never mind --

        KATHLEEN
  You were spying on me, weren't you?  You
  probably rented those children.

        JOE
  Why would I spy on you?

        KATHLEEN
  I am your competition.  Which you know
  perfectly well or you would not have put
  up that sign saying "Just around the
  Corner."

        JOE
  The entrance to our store is around the
  corner.  There is no other way to say it.
  It's not the name of our store, it's
  where it is.  You don't own "around the
  corner."

        KATHLEEN
  Next thing you'll be using twinkle
  lights.

        JOE
  Twinkle lights?

        KATHLEEN
  Little white Christmas lights that
  twinkle.  I use them in my window and on
  all my displays, as if you didn't notice.

        JOE
  Look, the reason I came into your store
  is that I was spending the day with
  Annabel and Matt.  I like to buy them a
  present when I see them because I'm one
  of those guys who likes to buy his way
  into the hearts of children who are his
  relatives.  There was only one place to
  buy children's books in the neighborhood
  -- although that will not always be the
  case, and it was yours, and it is a
  charming little bookstore.  You probably
  sell $250,000 worth of book a year --

        KATHLEEN
  How do you know that?

        JOE
  I'm in the book business.

        KATHLEEN
  I'm in the book business --

        JOE
  Oh, I see, and we're the Price Club.
  Only instead of a ten-gallon can of olive
  oil for $3.99 that won't even fit into
  your kitchen cabinet, we're selling cheap
  books.  Me a spy.
   (beat)
  Absolutely.  And I managed to get my hands
  on a secret printout of the sales figures
  of a bookstore so inconsequential and yet
  full of its own virtue that I was instantly
  compelled to rush over and check it out
  for fear it would drive me out of business
  --

 Kathleen stares at him.  She's speechless.

        JOE (cont'd)
  What?
   (off her look)
  What?

 Kathleen shakes her head.

 Frank turns up.

        FRANK
  Hi.  I'm Frank Navasky --

        JOE
  -- Joe Fox.

        FRANK
  Joe Fox?  Inventor of the Superstore,
  enemy of the mid-list novel, destroyer of
  City Books -- tell me something:
  How do you sleep at night?

 Patricia joins them.

        PATRICIA
  I use a wonderful over-the-counter drug,
  Ultrasom.  Don't take the whole thing,
  just half, and you will wake up without
  even that tiniest hangover.  You're Frank
  Navasky, aren't you?

        FRANK
  Yes.

        PATRICIA
  Your last piece in the Independent, the
  one about Anthony Powell, was brilliant.
  I'm Patricia Eden, Eden Books.  Joe, this
  man is the greatest living expert on
  Julius and Ethel Rosenberg --

        JOE
  And this is Kathleen Kelly --

 Kathleen glares at him.

        FRANK
  You liked my piece.  God, I'm flattered.
  You know you write these things and you
  think someone's going to mention them and
  then the whole week goes by and the phone
  doesn't ring, and you think Oh, God, I'm
  a fraud, a failure --

        PATRICIA
  You know what's always fascinated me
  about Julius and Ethel Rosenberg is how
  old they looked when they were really
  just our age.

 Everyone is stopped dead by this observation and looks at
 Patricia, who smiles at them all.

        PATRICIA
   (to Frank)
  I'm so happy to have finally met you.  We
  will talk.  Have you ever thought about
  doing a book?

        FRANK
  Oh sure, it's passed through my head.
  Something really relevant for today like
  the Luddite movement in 19th century
  England.

 At the same time:

        JOE
  Patricia --

        KATHLEEN
  Frank --

 INT. KATHLEEN'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

 As Kathleen and Frank get into bed.

        FRANK
  I really like Patricia Eden.  She's a
  very nice person.

 Kathleen doesn't respond.  Frank turns out the light.

        FRANK
  She needs educating, that's all.

 A beat.

        FRANK
  She's hopelessly driven by money and
  power, but there's a hope for anyone
  who's that familiar with my work --

 On Kathleen, as she turns away from Frank and lies there,
 eyes open.

 INT. JOE'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

 As Joe and Patricia get into bed.  Brinkley is already on the
 bed.

        PATRICIA
  I had no idea that Frank Navasky was so
  down-to-earth.

 Joe doesn't respond.  Patricia turns out the light.

        PATRICIA
  You read his stuff, you think he's going
  to be so obscure and abstruse.

 A beat.

        PATRICIA (cont'd)
  He's always talking about Heidigger and
  Foucault and I have no idea what any of
  it's about, really.

 Joe gets up.  Brinkley follows.

        PATRICIA (cont'd)
  Where are you going?

        JOE
  I'm not really tired.

 INT. JOE'S DEN - NIGHT

 Joe writes on his computer.  Brinkley on the floor next to him.

 And cut between Joe and his computer screen.

        JOE (V.O.)
  Do you ever feel you become the worst
  version of yourself?  That a Pandora's
  Box of all the secret hateful parts --
  your arrogance, your spite, your
  condescension -- has sprung open.
  Someone provokes you, and instead of
  just smiling and moving on, you zing
  them.  Hello, it's Mr. Nasty.  I'm sure
  you have no idea what I'm talking about.

 INT. KATHLEEN'S COMPUTER SCREEN - DAY

 And cut between screen and

 INT. KATHLEEN'S BEDROOM - DAY

 As Kathleen reads the end of Joe's letter.

 Kathleen hits the Reply key and starts to type:

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  I know what you mean and I'm completely
  jealous.  What happens to me when I'm
  provoked is that I get tongue-tied.  My
  mind goes blank.  Then I spend all night
  tossing and turning trying to think of
  what I should have said.

 INT. JOE'S COMPUTER SCREEN AND JOE'S DEN - NIGHT

 As he replies:

        JOE (V.O.)
  Wouldn't it be wonderful if I could pass
  all my zingers to you and then I would
  never behave badly and you could behave
  badly all the time and we'd both be
  happy?  On the other hand, I must warn
  you that when you finally have the
  pleasure of saying the thing you mean to
  say at the moment you mean to say it,
  remorse inevitably follows.  Do you think
  we should meet?

 INT. KATHLEEN'S COMPUTER SCREEN AND BEDROOM - DAY

 Kathleen stares at Joe's letter in her computer.

 She's frozen.

        KATHLEEN
  Meet?  Omigod.

 She sits staring at the letter.  She has no idea what to do.

 EXT. 75TH STREET & COLUMBUS - DAY

 As the iron gates on all the stores start to open, just the
 way we saw them open in the opening sequence of the movie.
 The pharmacy.  The optician.  The cosmetics supply store.
 The video store.

 And now, finally, we see the new grate on the new Foxbooks
 Superstore start to open upwards.  This is the finest grate
 on Broadway, no question of it.  It's electric and almost
 soundless.  We see a sign saying, OPENING DAY.  35% OFF ON
 ALL BEST-SELLERS.

 People on the street notice the store.  One walks in...

 CAMERA follows him...

 INT. FOXBOOKS SUPERSTORE - DAY

 The inside is beautiful.  Gleaning staircase, a cafe,
 comfortable chairs to sit, a bank of cashiers, everyone
 decked out in gray alligator shirts with a fox where the
 alligator should be, a rope for the checkout line, and seven
 cash registers with seven cashiers.  Of course, books, books,
 books, as far as the eye can see.

 MATCH DISSOLVE TO:

 INT. SAME SCENE - LATER THAT DAY

 The store is jam-packed.  Joe with his father Nelson, his
 grandfather Schuyler, and Kevin, the store manager.

        JOE
  No pickets, no demonstrations.

        KEVIN
  The neighborhood loves us.

        NELSON
  They're wondering where we've been all
  these years.  They're wondering how they
  ever did without it.

        SCHUYLER
  It's a hit.

 They admire their own store, walk through the downstairs and
 start up the staircase to the second floor.

        NELSON
  How's the children's book department?

        JOE
  It's early yet.  School isn't out.  And
  there's that children's bookstore nearby
  --

        SCHUYLER
  Cecilia's store --

        JOE
  Her daughter's --

        NELSON
  We'll crush it --

        SCHUYLER
  She was enchanting.

 And as they walk on upstairs, several mothers with children
 come up the stairs behind them.

 EXT. BROADWAY - MORNING

 A little group of children dressed as Pilgrims walk down the
 street as Kathleen comes around the corner to buy her morning
 paper.  Joe is at the newsstand.  She turns and pretends to
 be staring at a wall until he finishes buying his paper and
 walks on.

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  I don't think it's a good idea for us
  to meet...

 INT. STARBUCKS - ANOTHER DAY

 Joe is putting sugar into his coffee at the sugar counter as
 Kathleen comes in.  He pretends he didn't see her.