YOU'VE GOT MAIL

 She starts to type a response.

 Suddenly there's harp arpeggio and an Instant Message
 flashes on screen.

 From NY 152

 CLOSE ON KATHLEEN - TOTAL SHOCK

 ON SCREEN AS WE SEE THE MESSAGE

        JOE (V.O.)
  I had a gut feeling you would be on line
  now.

 INT. JOE'S BEDROOM - DAY

 Joe is in bed with his laptop.  And cut back and forth
 between them and their computer screens as they type Instant
 Messages to one another.  Possible split screens.

        JOE (V.O., cont'd)
  I can give you advice.  I'm great at
  advice.

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  I don't think you can help.

        JOE (V.O.)
  Is it about love?

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  My business is in trouble.  My mother
  would have something wise to say.

        JOE (V.O.)
  I'm a brilliant businessman.  It's what
  I do best.  What's your business?

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  No specifics, remember?

        JOE (V.O.)
  Minus specifics, it's hard to help.
  Except to say, go to the mattresses.

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  What?

        JOE (V.O.)
  It's from The Godfather.  It means you
  have to go to war.

 CLOSE ON KATHLEEN - LOOKING AT THE COMPUTER

        KATHLEEN
   (to herself)
  The Godfather?

 She starts to type.

        KATHLEEN (V.O.)
  What is it with men and The Godfather?

        JOE (V.O.)
  The Godfather is the I Ching.  The
  Godfather is the sum of all wisdom.  The
  Godfather is the answer to any question.
  What should I pack for my summer
  vacation?  "Leave the gun, take the
  cannoli."  What day of the week is it?
  "Maunday, Tuesday, Thursday, Wednesday."
  And the answer to your question is "Go to
  the mattresses."
   (continued)

 CAMERA ON KATHLEEN - CONSIDERING WHAT HE SAYS

        JOE (cont'd)
  You're at war.  "It's not personal, it's
  business.  It's not personal it's
  business."  Recite that to yourself every
  time you feel you're losing your nerve.
  I know you worry about being brave, this
  is your chance.  Fight.  Fight to the
  death.

 INT. JOE'S APARTMENT - DAY

 Patricia comes in as Joe is waiting for Kathleen's response.

        PATRICIA
  Look what I bought.

 Joe types "Ciao" and signs off.  Looks up to see Patricia
 showing him a Plexiglas menorah.

        PATRICIA
  I was just passing this store on Columbus
  Avenue and it caught my eye.

        JOE
  What is it?

        PATRICIA
  A Menorah.
        JOE
  It doesn't look like a Menorah.

        PATRICIA
  I know.  I don't know what came over me.
  I don't even celebrate Hanukkah.

 INT. KATHLEEN'S BEDROOM - DAY

 As Kathleen logs off, Frank comes in.

        KATHLEEN
  Frank, I've decided to go to the
  mattresses.  Do you think it would be a
  gigantic conflict of interest if you
  wrote something about us?

 INT. THE SHOP AROUND THE CORNER - DAY

 It's January.  The store is more crowded than we've seen it.
 Frank is there with several copies of the Independent.  The
 phone is ringing off the hook.  Christina and George are
 fielding calls.  Birdie is reading Frank's article.

        BIRDIE
   (reading)
  "Kathleen Kelly and her mother Cecilia
  Kelly have raised your children.  If this
  precious resource is killed by the cold
  cash cow of Foxbooks, it will not only be
  the end of Western civilization as we
  know it, but the end of something even
  dearer: our neighborhood as we know it.
  Save the Shop Around the Corner and you
  will save your own soul."  Frank, that's
  charming.

        FRANK
  You think it's a little over the top?

        BIRDIE
  Just say thank you.

        FRANK
  Thank you.

        CHRISTINA
   (calling to Kathleen)
  Channel 2's outside.

 INT. BACK ROOM - THE SHOP AROUND THE CORNER - SAME TIME

 Kathleen is primping in a tiny wall mirror.  She takes a deep
 breath.

        KATHLEEN
  In a second.

        GEORGE
   (from the other room)
  The Village Voice is coming.

        KATHLEEN
  Omigod.

 Frank sticks his head in.

        FRANK
   (in shock)
  It's him.

        KATHLEEN
  Who?

        FRANK
  God. It is God.

 INT. SHOP AROUND THE CORNER - CONTINUOUS

 Kathleen comes out of the storage room.

 William Spungeon is standing there.

        WILLIAM SPUNGEON
  I'm William Spungeon.

        KATHLEEN
  I'm very pleased to meet you.  I'm
  Kathleen Kelly.

 Frank is practically levitating.

        SPUNGEON
  I knew your mother.  Although she knew me
  only as W.  That enormous bookstore is
  obscene.

        FRANK
  I'm Frank Navasky.  I carry your picture
  in my wallet.

 He pulls it out.  Spungeon looks at him like he's crazy.

        KATHLEEN
  We've organized pickets.  Channel 13 is
  doing a special.

        SPUNGEON
  I'd be glad to talk to the press if it's
  all right with you.  They've been trying
  to interview me for years.

        FRANK
  The press?  I'm the press.

        KATHLEEN
  You'd allow that?  For me?  For the
  store?  That's incredible.  Although you
  wouldn't have to be photographed.  I
  respect that.  If it's television, they
  could just put one of those blurry dots
  in front of your face.

        SPUNGEON
  No television.

        CHRISTINA
   (referring to the TV crew)
  They're waiting for you --

        FRANK
  I know all your books.  Phaelox the
  gnome, the little man who comes from
  nowhere... and is going nowhere...
   (quoting)
  "Where did you come from?"  "Nowhere."
  "Where are you going?"  "Nowhere."

        SPUNGEON
  Cool it.  I'm starting to break out in
  hives.
   (to Kathleen)
  Here's my phone number.

        KATHLEEN
  I had no idea William Spugeon had a
  phone.

        SPUNGEON
  Adios.

 He gives a little wave and leaves.

        FRANK
  This is historic.
   (beat)
  Do you realize what I've done?  By
  writing that piece, do you realize?
  I've brought William Spungeon in from
  the cold. Holy shit.  I am completely
  amazing.

 At that moment a TV REPORTER sticks her head into the store.

        TV REPORTER
  Kathleen Kelly?

 Kathleen takes a deep breath, walks out the door.

 EXT. SHOP AROUND THE CORNER - A FEW MINUTES LATER

        CHANNEL 2 TV REPORTER
  Are you ready, Miss Kelly?

        KATHLEEN
  Luca Brasi sleeps with the fishes.

        CHANNEL 2 TV REPORTER
  What?

        KATHLEEN
  Never mind.  I'm ready.  Shoot.

 INT. TELEVISION SCREEN - THAT NIGHT

        CHANNEL 2 TV REPORTER
  We're here in front of the Shop Around
  the Corner, the famous West Side
  children's bookstore now on the verge of
  having to close its doors because the big
  bad wolf, Foxbooks, has opened only a few
  hundred feet away, wooing customers with
  its sharp discounts and designer coffee.

        KATHLEEN
  They have to have discounts and lattes,
  because most of the people who work there
  have never read a book.

 And pull back now to reveal that we're in:

 INT. GYM - NIGHT

 Five TV sets are on, over adjoining treadmills, Joe and
 Kevin are on two of the treadmills, walking and watching.

        JOE
  She's not as nice as she seems on
  television.

        KEVIN
  You've met her?

        JOE
  She's kind of a pill.

        KEVIN
  She's probably not as attractive as she
  seems on television either.

        JOE
  No, she's beautiful.  But a pill.

        KEVIN
  So you don't feel bad about basically
  destroying her livelihood not to mention
  her legacy not to mention her raison
  d'etre.

        JOE
  It's not personal --

        KEVIN
  It's business.

        JOE
  Right.  Exactly.

 They look up at the television.

 INT. TELEVISION SCREEN - CONTINUOUS

 Joe onscreen, with a super: Joe Fox, Vice-President Foxbooks.

        JOE
  I sell cheap books.  Sue me.  I sell
  cheap books, and as a result -- listen
  to this, because it's really bad --
  more people can buy books.

 The show immediately cuts back to the newscaster.

 On Joe and Kevin.

        KEVIN
  That's what you said?

        JOE
   (outraged)
  That's not all I said.  I said -- I can't
  believe those bastards -- I said we were
  great, I said people can come and sit and
  read for hours and no one bothers them, I
  said we stock 150,000 titles, I showed
  them the New York City section.  I said
  we were a goddamn piazza where people
  could mingle and mix and be.

        KEVIN
  A piazza?

        JOE
  I was eloquent.  Shit.  It's just
  inevitable, isn't it?  People are going
  to want to turn her into Joan of Arc --

        KEVIN
  -- and you into Attila the Hun.

        JOE
  Well it's not me personally, it's more
  like it's the company --

        KATHLEEN
   (on the television)
  And I have to say, I have met Joe Fox,
  who owns Foxbooks, and I have heard him
  compared his store to a Price Club and the
  books in it to cans of olive oil.

 On Joe, reacting.